What are "tops" and "bottoms"?

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What are "tops" and "bottoms"? - 8/30/2006 11:08:15 AM

Chloelicious

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Joined: 8/10/2006
From: belgium, Brussels, Forest
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Hello A/all,

First i hope that i' m not posting something that has been explained 1000X.

My question is: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? As we dont use this title in French/Belgian Bdsm, it's sound strange to me.

Thank you in advance for your explanations.

Chloé

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RE: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? - 8/30/2006 11:15:46 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Chloelicious
My question is: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? As we dont use this title in French/Belgian Bdsm, it's sound strange to me.

As always, there are no universals here (yes I like the conflict in that too).

Top and bottom are also highly contextual words.

IN GENERAL, top = decider/giver, bottom = agreer/receiver. If you stick with those broad generalizations, you'll be fine.

In gay male culture, top and bottom are used to describe the sort of orientation a person takes within a relationship, as well as what position sexually they prefer. Tops almost never are penetrated, while bottoms almost always are.

In kink culture, top/bottom used to be the main terms. Sub/slave/switch/mistress/master/mentor/etc etc came later as the culture evolved.

Nowadays, top/bottom in the kink culture is used to define a specific play relationship, positions people take within scenes, but is not part of their day to day relationship dynamic or foundations.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_126254/mpage_1/key_bottom%252Cdefinition/tm.htm#126255
Top vs Dom Bottom vs Sub

< Message edited by LuckyAlbatross -- 8/30/2006 11:19:16 AM >

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RE: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? - 8/30/2006 11:42:10 AM

Bearlee

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From: South Central CO
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WOW... very good job, LA! Well put! Thank you (again!!!)

beverly

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RE: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? - 8/30/2006 1:41:22 PM

Satyr6406

Posts: 820
Joined: 3/27/2006
From: New Brunswick, N.J.
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Firstly, Chloe;

       Si vous etes "francophone"; Bien venue!

       If you're flemmish; Goie avond (It's afternoon, here, right now)!



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Former Vice-President Gore didn't invent the internet but, he DID make up global warming!

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RE: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? - 8/30/2006 2:01:31 PM

MissyRane

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oh man and I thought top/Dom(me) bottom/sub/slave was the same I've been living in a lieeeeeeeeeee

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RE: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? - 8/30/2006 5:07:30 PM

TopCurious0

Posts: 35
Joined: 12/2/2005
From: West Lafayette, IN
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

Nowadays, top/bottom in the kink culture is used to define a specific play relationship, positions people take within scenes, but is not part of their day to day relationship dynamic or foundations.

As I understand it Top and Bottom are action oriented, who does stuff, or has stuff done to them. Master/Dom/Domme and sub/slave is power dynamic oriented, who controls what.

Thus a Dom who is a bottom might be found saying "Whip me harder slave!" or "Tie me tighter girl".

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RE: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? - 8/30/2006 7:26:35 PM

hizgeorgiapeach

Posts: 1672
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MissyRane

oh man and I thought top/Dom(me) bottom/sub/slave was the same I've been living in a lieeeeeeeeeee

Most people make the (mistaken) assumption that Tops are always Dominant, and Bottoms are always Submissive.

Primarly Top/Bottom are used these days in the SM/scene sense - ie the Top being the person who holds the whip, the Bottom being the person who gets whipped.

I'm a bottom. I am Not submissive, and have little (if any) use for power exchange outside of SM scening.

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RE: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? - 8/30/2006 9:17:34 PM

Homestead

Posts: 1005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Chloelicious

Hello A/all,

First i hope that i' m not posting something that has been explained 1000X.

My question is: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? As we dont use this title in French/Belgian Bdsm, it's sound strange to me.

Thank you in advance for your explanations.

Chloé

In genral,it means people more into bsdm bondage and sensation play than D/s.

(in reply to Chloelicious)

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RE: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? - 8/31/2006 2:34:09 AM

darkinshadows

Posts: 4145
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: UK
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quote:

ORIGINAL: hizgeorgiapeach

quote:

ORIGINAL: MissyRane

oh man and I thought top/Dom(me) bottom/sub/slave was the same I've been living in a lieeeeeeeeeee

Most people make the (mistaken) assumption that Tops are always Dominant, and Bottoms are always Submissive.

Primarly Top/Bottom are used these days in the SM/scene sense - ie the Top being the person who holds the whip, the Bottom being the person who gets whipped.

I'm a bottom. I am Not submissive, and have little (if any) use for power exchange outside of SM scening.

I wanted to also add to peach's statement that not all D-types are tops and s-types arent always bottoms. I am submissive, but I can top if its desired. And usual response to those thinking - no I am not a switch.

Peace and Rapture

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RE: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? - 8/31/2006 2:45:26 AM

Chloelicious

Posts: 1078
Joined: 8/10/2006
From: belgium, Brussels, Forest
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Satyr,

Hello and thank you for the welcome. I'm french speaking/ francophone.

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If the Evil spirit arm the Tiger with Claws, Brahman provided wings for the Dove...... Guns and roses

If global warming continue, we will have SOLAR bears !!!
( unknown)

If love is blind......I guess I will buy myself a cane (guns and roses

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RE: What are "tops" and "bottoms"? - 8/31/2006 2:47:00 AM

Chloelicious

Posts: 1078
Joined: 8/10/2006
From: belgium, Brussels, Forest
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LA;

Thank you for your piece of enlightment, you are always really helpfull. I think i understand better.

Chloé

_____________________________

If the Evil spirit arm the Tiger with Claws, Brahman provided wings for the Dove...... Guns and roses

If global warming continue, we will have SOLAR bears !!!
( unknown)

If love is blind......I guess I will buy myself a cane (guns and roses

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

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