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[Poll]

Who would be interested in a TPE forum?

Yes, a TPE forum would be useful.

71% (27)

No, we have enough forums already.

28% (11)

Total Votes : 38

(last vote on : 7/25/2007 10:02:51 PM)
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Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 9:59:59 AM

Lordandmaster

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Question: How many people would want to see a TPE forum on Collarme? OK, I know that TPE is a Totally Pointless Expression, but I think you know what I'm talking about. I'm talking about a board where we wouldn't have to keep arguing about whether "no limits slaves" exist or should exist; where we wouldn't have to keep arguing about why "safe, sane, consensual" doesn't provide a very useful guide to master/slave relationships; where we wouldn't have to keep explaining that people who don't share these views aren't being coerced into accepting them in their own lives. That way, the members of CM who understand these kinds of relationships, and may even be currently engaged in them, can discuss topics that affect their lives, without constantly having to explain to the self-righteous masses that it's a valid way of life too.

Edited to add: Of course, everyone would be free to post in the forum. At first I thought that would go without saying, but I suppose it's better to add that disclaimer right at the start.

< Message edited by Lordandmaster -- 9/4/2006 10:09:57 AM >

Post #: 1

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 10:15:17 AM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
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I don't think either poll answer applies to me. I think that it wouldn't change much. Just as male subs sometimes answer the "Ask a Mistress" questions, people are inclined to input their wisdom and questions wherever they see fit.

TPE is how a lot of online idiots fantasize, with 24/7 caging, Mistresses who never get tired of wearing 8" heels, and who beat them for the slightest infraction. They would all ask their online TPE questions there.

Even if you guys got a different forum, you'd still have the "self-righteous masses" poking in and adding their opinions, regardless of how similar the opinions are to the accepted ones.

You'd still have the pedantic ones who insist on you defining "no limits," "TPE," and "consent."

You'd still have those in there for a lark. You'd still have flamers in there. You'd have all the forum undesirables there that you seek to avoid.

Granted, you'd have a place for you to discuss certain issues amongst peers, but this haven you want to create, free of all internet stupidity, would not come to be.

Just my opinion.

Yours,

benji

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(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 2

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 10:20:29 AM

Lordandmaster

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Well, yeah, I don't expect to create a haven free of internet stupidity, but at least it would be a forum where the disbelieving mainstreamers could SEE that there are real flesh-and-blood human beings living in relationships that they might otherwise dismiss as pure fantasy. When ONE person in a thread brings this up, everyone always pounces on him or her--you're sick, you're lying to yourself, you're doing something horriby wrong. If there were a place where several people openly stated that this was the life they're living, it would be harder to take the "Oh you're just one deluded voice drowned out by all us right-thinkers" line.

Obviously I don't believe that TPE relationships are right for everyone, and I don't expect a new forum to make people set aside their deeply held objections to it. But at least it would be some kind of indication to neophytes that there are other people who have the same needs. Remember how we all felt when we first discovered that there were OTHER people into BDSM? I think it might help some people to discover that there are OTHER people who choose TPE.

quote:

ORIGINAL: gooddogbenji

Granted, you'd have a place for you to discuss certain issues amongst peers, but this haven you want to create, free of all internet stupidity, would not come to be.

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 3

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 10:34:44 AM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
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From: Toronto
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Alright, that's fair enough. However, if you want to show people that there are others into TPE, then should there not also be a scat forum, to show people that there are others who are into scat, and that it is not just fantasy? And what about just tops and bottoms? Should S&M not get its own forum? And daddydoms? To show they're not pedos? I think the same argument could be made for any number of kinks/fetishes/lifestyle choices, and then we would really have too many forums.

Yours,

benji

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 4

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 10:40:10 AM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
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I would agree with you if we had been having one unproductive conversation after another about scat. But we haven't. I think most people accept scat as a very bizarre fetish that they don't share, but that isn't inherently immoral or insane.

Look, I don't see too many people on a crusade to protect neophytes from scat. But you see all kinds of people with their militant attitudes about TPE, and they usually justify themselves by saying that they're just protecting the newbies (among other reasons, of course). Well, I'd like the newbies to be able to decide for themselves.

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 5

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 10:43:37 AM

BrutalAntipathy

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Joined: 7/8/2005
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While I would love to see a forum that was free of weekend ass slappers, I have to agree with Benji. We already cater to multiple tastes, including the ones that refuse to admit that they are just variants of BDSM. And just because you have a dedicated forum doesn't mean that the know it all poseurs aren't going to be flaming you on it.

(in reply to gooddogbenji)

Post #: 6

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 10:47:58 AM

angelic

Posts: 1807
Joined: 1/24/2005
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Last i looked CM was an open forum... those that disagree have just as much right to respond there as anywhere.

i mean, c'mon... there are STILL those that respond every time jessicapower posts... ~shrugs~ we are all human (regardless of how some view themselves)

< Message edited by angelic -- 9/4/2006 10:54:28 AM >

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(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 7

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 10:49:07 AM

Homestead

Posts: 1005
Status: offline

I can only see it as useful if there is a moderator who can limit acess. That way the conversations would not be interrupted by those who's only real interests seem to be as flame trolls.

(in reply to BrutalAntipathy)

Post #: 8

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 10:51:02 AM

Tikkiee

Posts: 1099
Joined: 4/6/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BrutalAntipathy

While I would love to see a forum that was free of weekend ass slappers, I have to agree with Benji. We already cater to multiple tastes, including the ones that refuse to admit that they are just variants of BDSM. And just because you have a dedicated forum doesn't mean that the know it all poseurs aren't going to be flaming you on it.

I would love to see a place where a person could go and discuss things of this nature without fear of the 'holier than thou, we must save you from yourself' types. However, with it being an open forum, you would naturally get those who would still be trying to convert, trying to convince that their way is the only way, and those who are just plainly so enamoured of their own way of doing things that anyone who does different, is a fake or a poser.
A good idea, but one that I doubt would work,unless you could find a way to limit the posters to just those of the particular forum.

An example would be the Gorean forums here. A wonderful place to find information on a variety of topics, and from a vast group of differing opinions...and yet, you still get those who go in there and flame anyone who does not agree with how they do things.
/shrug

Opinions are very much emotional things; when attacked, we respond with emotion and not logic ( not saying that this is the majority, just making a general comment )

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(in reply to BrutalAntipathy)

Post #: 9

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 10:53:25 AM

Lordandmaster

Posts: 10943
Joined: 6/22/2004
Status: offline

Of course they would. I wouldn't want a forum where only certain people were permitted to speak or only certain opinions could be expressed. (That would never fly on Collarme anyway.) But at least we'd clear up, once and for all, the question of whether such relationships "really" exist. "Those who disagree" would be talking to a group, not to isolated individuals, and would have to abandon the revolting pretense that they speak for all sane and right-thinking BDSM lifestylers.

Look at the "Do slaves have the right to say no?" thread (over in "General BDSM Discussion"). How many times do you see someone saying "You took the words right out of my mouth!" or "You've just expressed exactly what I was trying to say!" It's as though all kinds of people never realized that others feel exactly the same way that they do. A forum would brings those people together.

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelic

Last i looked CM was an open forum... those that disagree have just as much right to respond there as anywhere.

(in reply to angelic)

Post #: 10

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 10:59:14 AM

angelic

Posts: 1807
Joined: 1/24/2005
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yes, LordandMaster, that is true... may be i look at it differently (i'm sort of odd that way)... if there is a raucus (sp?) discussion going on in one of threads... i enjoy the thread that much more... i LEARN from it...i truly get bored with threads where everyone is agreeing with everyone else... i don't learn because i don't get to see both sides... and that is what i truly enjoy most here...

some things are just very emotional for people... and not all respond in 'logical' ways... that doesn't mean the one responding from an emotional side is wrong... just different...

_____________________________

~....and once you have tasted flight, you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been and there you long to return.~ -- Leonardo de Vinci

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 11

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 11:04:47 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

I can see the benefits of it. I am in a TPE type yahoo forum and it is a bit refreshing and DOES seem to cull out a bit of the fluffiness and you won't get bonked on the head by saying you're being abused because you sleep on the floor.

But it can be kinda boring too- people who make the Ms relationship work in the long term tend to be pretty normal people who just understand the basics- know what you're getting into before you get into it, and work together within the dynamic when issues come up.

And the no limits issues still would exist- not all masters and slaves are in agreement on that.

_____________________________

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(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 12

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 11:05:03 AM

BrutalAntipathy

Posts: 412
Joined: 7/8/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Of course they would. I wouldn't want a forum where only certain people were permitted to speak or only certain opinions could be expressed. (That would never fly on Collarme anyway.) But at least we'd clear up, once and for all, the question of whether such relationships "really" exist. "Those who disagree" would be talking to a group, not to isolated individuals, and would have to abandon the revolting pretense that they speak for all sane and right-thinking BDSM lifestylers.

Look at the "Do slaves have the right to say no?" thread (over in "General BDSM Discussion"). How many times do you see someone saying "You took the words right out of my mouth!" or "You've just expressed exactly what I was trying to say!" It's as though all kinds of people never realized that others feel exactly the same way that they do. A forum would brings those people together.

quote:

ORIGINAL: angelic

Last i looked CM was an open forum... those that disagree have just as much right to respond there as anywhere.

Good point. As I was once flamed by multiple people for stating my opinion ( in a thread that asked if we thought that part time D/s'ers were ' lifestyle ' ), I know first hand how it feels to have 50 part timers, including one supposedly respectable author on the subject of D/s, spewing their fluff bunny gibberish and mantras while I tried to pretty much single handedly defend my right to an opinion. It would be nice to know that there are others that realize that TPE has more to it than wearing leather 24/7, as the unnamed author implied with his flame. Still though, if you cater to every whim and fetish it will take 10 minutes to scroll to the bottom of the message board page.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 13

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 11:10:56 AM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
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I like the idea, although wouldn't there then be arguments of what the definition of TPE is? Still, I agree there would be less squabble about right, wrong, abuse, and "you are completely insane because you would do that" statements.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 14

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 11:12:11 AM

MistressWolfen

Posts: 578
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline

I think I would enjoy that LaM, and would gladly participate.

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Post #: 15

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 11:25:13 AM

Level

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I wouldn't have a problem with it, Lam. I tend to not believe in genuine slavery, but I'm the first to admit that I may very well be wrong, and I'd enjoy sitting back and listening to those with a different pov, and maybe learn a thing or two.

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to MistressWolfen)

Post #: 16

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 11:33:13 AM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

I wouldn't have a problem with it, Lam. I tend to not believe in genuine slavery, but I'm the first to admit that I may very well be wrong, and I'd enjoy sitting back and listening to those with a different pov, and maybe learn a thing or two.

Ya want a disingenuous slave, do ya?

(you know I'm teasing)

(in reply to Level)

Post #: 17

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 12:07:31 PM

Level

Posts: 25145
Joined: 3/3/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ownedgirlie

quote:

ORIGINAL: Level

I wouldn't have a problem with it, Lam. I tend to not believe in genuine slavery, but I'm the first to admit that I may very well be wrong, and I'd enjoy sitting back and listening to those with a different pov, and maybe learn a thing or two.

Ya want a disingenuous slave, do ya? (you know I'm teasing)

lol, no, I want an ambidextrous one! ...... I tell you, owned, as long as she does what I want and makes me happy (which might be slightly different than what some may think), I will be content.

And I hope you're having a good Labor day, sweet friend.

< Message edited by Level -- 9/4/2006 12:08:00 PM >

_____________________________

Fake the heat and scratch the itch
Skinned up knees and salty lips
Let go it's harder holding on
One more trip and I'll be gone

~~ Stone Temple Pilots

(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 18

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 12:41:51 PM

BeingChewsie

Posts: 1633
Joined: 10/27/2005
Status: offline

I would very much like one. I tend to hang out on the gorean forum a lot because at least there slaves are generally slaves. You are right it would give us a place to discuss issues related to relationships of total power. I would certainly particpate. If you didn't believe in it, you would have no reason to post there unless you were trying to be argumentative. I wish they would..it is sorely lacking here. The idea that we would argue over meaning is not really true. The majority of us who live this way and have for a number of years are extremely close in theory and practice. The gorean fourm occasionally gets some naysayers and shit stirrers but overall the forum is dedicated to gorean issues and stays that way. I think it would work.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lordandmaster

Question: How many people would want to see a TPE forum on Collarme? OK, I know that TPE is a Totally Pointless Expression, but I think you know what I'm talking about. I'm talking about a board where we wouldn't have to keep arguing about whether "no limits slaves" exist or should exist; where we wouldn't have to keep arguing about why "safe, sane, consensual" doesn't provide a very useful guide to master/slave relationships; where we wouldn't have to keep explaining that people who don't share these views aren't being coerced into accepting them in their own lives. That way, the members of CM who understand these kinds of relationships, and may even be currently engaged in them, can discuss topics that affect their lives, without constantly having to explain to the self-righteous masses that it's a valid way of life too.

Edited to add: Of course, everyone would be free to post in the forum. At first I thought that would go without saying, but I suppose it's better to add that disclaimer right at the start.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 19

RE: Who would be interested in a TPE forum? - 9/4/2006 1:42:15 PM

sleazybutterfly

Posts: 2801
Joined: 5/15/2006
Status: offline

i think it's a good idea, LaM, Sir. It would be nice to know there are others that feel the same way i do, and have at least the same foundational outlook on things. Of course there will be disagreements, but that is to be expected in an open forum where people from all walks of life participate.

andrea

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~Curvylicious
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, she became a butterfly.
Life is not a popularity contest, it's better to be hated for what you believe, than loved for a lie.

(in reply to Lordandmaster)

Post #: 20

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