What exactly is an online romance?

What exactly is an online romance? (Full Version)

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openmindedslave -> What exactly is an online romance? (9/4/2006 3:51:44 PM)
I know I am asking a very simple question ...but I find the wording sort of strange to me. In that , when I think of romance , I think of the personal contact (in person ) that we make when we are "courting " someone. I clearly understand looking for friends here or even the type of people you want to meet. But could someone explain to me how you can "romance "someone on the internet. I am not being cruel in my question. I think its just the expression I may be having problems with ...thank you for your understanding

Celeste43 -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/4/2006 4:15:43 PM)
Think of two centuries ago, when people communicated by letter. Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen as I recall has a letter romance. The courtship of Robert Browning and Elizabeth Barrett Browning was by letter. If you can't afford to go visit every weekend, you write, chat and phone.

sophia37 -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/4/2006 6:51:08 PM)
celeste said it as well as I could.

Donnalee -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/4/2006 7:02:39 PM)
Maybe if you thought of how couples who are separated in the military keep up their romance, it would give you some ideas. Or how non-custodial parents keep their relationship alive with their children while they're separated. You use emails, IMs, cams, computer phone calls, cell phones, pictures, videos, text messages, phones, and letters. My husband and I met overseas and corresponded (before the internet) by letter and phone in between twice monthly visits. We were married within 8 months of the first meeting, and have been for 16 years. It's not something new with the internet! [:)] I think you'll find some biases against anything but full time face to face relationships on these boards and others, but there are plenty of people that are heavily invested in them and feel the full range of emotions associated with any other form of romance.

Noah -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/4/2006 7:08:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: openmindedslave I know I am asking a very simple question ...but I find the wording sort of strange to me. In that , when I think of romance , I think of the personal contact (in person ) that we make when we are "courting " someone. I clearly understand looking for friends here or even the type of people you want to meet. But could someone explain to me how you can "romance "someone on the internet. I am not being cruel in my question. I think its just the expression I may be having problems with ...thank you for your understanding What, exactly, is an offline romance?

porcelaine -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/4/2006 8:24:43 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: openmindedslave I know I am asking a very simple question ...but I find the wording sort of strange to me. In that , when I think of romance , I think of the personal contact (in person ) that we make when we are "courting " someone. I clearly understand looking for friends here or even the type of people you want to meet. But could someone explain to me how you can "romance "someone on the internet. I am not being cruel in my question. I think its just the expression I may be having problems with ...thank you for your understanding I think your question is centered around relationships that are purely relegated to the cyber realm. If I'm correct I can understand your confusion because these situations have not been solidified in the flesh. As we all know it is easy to become emotionally and mentally beholden to someone, but the lack of physical contact does not provide the validation of these feelings on either side. For some this is an ideal way of relating that fits into their particular circumstance without complication. I believe it is possible to develop a connection, but I would never trade a look, touch, or the comfort of someone's arms for random keystrokes and conversation on the internet. porcelaine

Noah -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/4/2006 9:36:23 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: porcelaine ... I believe it s possible to develop a connection, but I would never trade a look, touch, or the comfort of someone's arms for random keystrokes and conversation on the internet. porcelaine Never? That was the word you used. If your beloved partner was across the state on business or confined to a foreign hospital you would actually prefer to take physical comforts with some third person who happened to be in arm's reach rather than, say, talk to your lover on the phone or via chat if that was the most intimate option available? That's your business, I guess. But what do "random keystrokes and conversation" have to do with the question? In what way are the words and letters of any romance--near at hand or far--profitably seen as random? As for me, when my girlfriend is not with me I would--and in fact often do-- gladly trade away (random or otherwise) physical strokes and conversation off of the internet with someone else for the chance to conduct my relationship with her at a distance by phone or in chat. In fact she would not now be my girlfriend but for the romance we first conducted over the internet, through the mail and on the phone. We all like rubbing, porcelaine, but isn't romance a meeting of hearts and souls first of all?

mnottertail -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/4/2006 9:46:10 PM)
Noah, do you recall the name of the movie where hannibal lector and mrs robinson kept up this long correspondence over the pond and they were booksellers? Winston Churchill and his old lady traded a couple posts. Et Al. In fact, before the internet there were many long distance love affairs carried out with no or little physical contact. if myron kant were here today, he could wax long and eloquent about these things., why don't you Noah? LOL, Mycroft Kant, esq. capitalist and philosopher.

CrappyDom -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/4/2006 10:45:24 PM)
Noah, Give us all a break, you are intelligent enough to know what she meant, in fact, she clearly spelled it out. I read all of the Harry Potter books, all of the Tolkien books, all of the Narnia series, and even an obscure series called The Stainless Steel Rat and a couple of others over the phone to my pet while she was away at school. However, we had and did spend time with each other and had a "real" relationship prior and even during the time apart. Of course I would rather spend time with her on the phone than cheat on her, but that isn't what porcelaine meant and she clearly spelled it out.

AAkasha -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/4/2006 10:50:53 PM)
I met my husband, quite accidently, via an online romance. Mostly it was over the phone, to be honest, with very little online after we got to that stage. Except for the nasty photos and videos of course. When you spend 4 - 5 hours a night on the phone for a year you get to know someone pretty well. Once we met in person and confirmed the chemistry was the same, we were married a couple of months later. Usually, though, online romance does not transfer to real life. It's a huge risk. I strongly recommend people that have online romances to meet immediately so you don't spend years of your life on a fantasy. Akasha in the case of my "online romance" - I was still dating men in real life because I didn't think the online thing would ever stand the test of real life. Oops. my bad.

marieToo -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/4/2006 10:53:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Noah What, exactly, is an offline romance? This is just a stab in the dark on my part. But Im guessing that an offline romance, is a romance that is conducted.....ummm....offline. This question is even worse than "what is a farm supply store?". lmaooo...Sorry, I couldnt resist. :)

mnottertail -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/5/2006 6:46:25 AM)
Well, WTF? Don't leave us hanging here, M2.........what is it? Ron

marieToo -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/5/2006 6:53:34 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mnottertail Well, WTF? Don't leave us hanging here, M2.........what is it? Ron Its my practice to never leave good men 'hanging'. lol

kitty2MLoneWolf -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/5/2006 6:53:45 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: CrappyDom Noah, I read all of the Harry Potter books, all of the Tolkien books, all of the Narnia series, and even an obscure series called The Stainless Steel Rat and a couple of others over the phone to my pet while she was away at school. Falls in lust over CD once again.. Damn man.. you ARE the perfect male! LOL

MsKatHouston -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/5/2006 7:22:29 AM)
I think in many ways online romance can be a lot more thrilling and prolong the oooh ahhh factor awhile. On the Internet you don't deal so much with the reality of daily living and can concentrate on one another and all those things that you adore about each other. It is romantic and a lovely fantasy. When that type of situation compliments a real time situation in the example of a long distance relationship or temporary separation, it can be a lot of fun. For example, when we were moving to Houston from Cali, my husband left 4 months before I did. We had a pretty healthy internet romance going on during that time. Romantic, hot and although online it was based in reality. But, when online is all you have and all you ever will have, it is only fantasy. The feelings of romance can still be there much the same as when you have a crush on a star after watching a great movie or you dream about the hero in your favorite book. Pleasurable, sure. Will that translate to the same feelings in real life? Maybe, maybe not. I am with Akasha here with if you meet someone online, try to meet in person sooner than later. If all you want is the fantasy, entertain yourself, knock yourself out. But if you want someone there with you, at some point fantasy must meet reality and better sooner than later.

openmindedslave -> RE: What exactly is an online romance? (9/5/2006 7:22:47 PM)
Then , if I may ask this question concerning online romancing here. So if someone states this in their profile interest that they are seeking "online romance", then is it another way of saying "a longterm relationship."Or is it differnt. I really am trying to figure out if the two terms should mean the same thing so that I am clear on their meanings.

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