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Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 1:56:37 PM   
Samwhiplash


Posts: 191
Joined: 10/5/2005
Status: offline 		Ive been Domme all my life, but only came to proper realisation what it is all about in the past few years.

Just wondering, keen to hear if other Dommes also find Dom men hugely attractive? It puts me at cross purposes, I will never switch - its not in my nature, but rules so many out of bounds for me (wont do vanilla anymore and I dont switch).

All thoughts welcome.

Mistress Sam
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 2:00:40 PM   
MsKatHouston


Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline 		I find a lot of men attractive and I am typically attracted to strong personalities.  I choose strong submissives because it allows me to indulge in my kink with a person I am attracted to.  I have several Male Dom friends...while I won't have a D/s relationship with them (I too will not switch) I can have some great banter and the occasional wild romp with a particular one.

What qualities about Dom men do you like?  Those same qualities can be found in submissives...their kink is just a bit different.

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to Samwhiplash)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 2:05:38 PM   
LaTigresse


Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
Status: offline 		I completely understand what you mean. The two women that I have had any sort of serious relationships with have always been dominant in their other relationships and I was attracted to their strong confident personalities. I still enjoy that interesting dynamic, it makes the private life more special somehow.

_____________________________

My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

(in reply to Samwhiplash)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 2:28:46 PM   
TheShadows


Posts: 403
Joined: 9/16/2004
From: Southern Illinois
Status: offline 		Yes, I find one Dominant Man to be hugely attractive.  He also happens to be my husband. LOL.  Regardless of scene orientation, we connect very deeply on a personal level.  We call each other "Partners in Crime", and have a wonderfully fulfilling relationship. 

An idea would be to seek out Dominant Men who're interested in a partnership/relationship with a Female Dominant, based on a very personal, even vanilla, level, who you also have Lifestyle interests/goals in common with.  That's my best advice, as it's worked wonderfully for us.

Best of Luck,

MrsShadows

_____________________________

"The reason the mainstream is thought of as a stream is because of it's shallowness." - George Carlin

"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most..." - Ozzy Osbourne

(in reply to Samwhiplash)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 2:43:42 PM   
WildnWicked


Posts: 50
Joined: 2/26/2004
From: Lancaster, California
Status: offline 		I will concur that they are a hugh turn on. I enjoy that my partner isn't what I would call "Dominant" but rather a Sadist.. and I am more into Dominance than Sadism. We complement each other when we aren't fighting for the remote. lol

_____________________________

We live in a society of victimization, where people are much more comfortable being victimized than actually standing up for themselves.-- Marilyn Manson

(in reply to TheShadows)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 2:49:48 PM   
TheShadows


Posts: 403
Joined: 9/16/2004
From: Southern Illinois
Status: offline 		Exactly.  Which, we're secure enough in ourselves, our personal abilities, and our relationship that we're able to own a slave together, which may or may not be true for the OP or her potential Dominant partner.  That's a whole other issue, though.  Sorry, got off on a tangent there.

MrsShadows

_____________________________

"The reason the mainstream is thought of as a stream is because of it's shallowness." - George Carlin

"Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most..." - Ozzy Osbourne

(in reply to WildnWicked)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 3:03:28 PM   
mp072004


Posts: 381
Joined: 12/22/2005
Status: offline 		I'm a dominant woman, I live with and love a dominant man. So...yeah, I found at least one I like.

I've found other people who identify as dominant--men and women, het, bi, and gay alike--attractive as friends and as lovers. There are characteristics I like in people's personalities that often occur in good dominants' personalities--ambition, responsibility, honor, legitimate pride, a capacity and taste for polemic--and there are characteristics I like that don't really correlate with dominance, but can occur in people who identify as dominant--blue eyes, nice delts, appreciation for good literature. It doesn't strike me as odd that I like some other people who are dominant--after all, I like me, and I'm dominant. However, I think I'm attracted to particular characteristics, some of which associate with dominant behavior. I'm not attracted to people who identify as dominant as such--while I like some dominants, I've known some het men who identify as dominant who I disliked, and many dominants of both sexes who I was indifferent to.

Monica

(in reply to Samwhiplash)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 3:09:11 PM   
Contesaluv


Posts: 173
Joined: 3/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Samwhiplash

Ive been Domme all my life, but only came to proper realisation what it is all about in the past few years.

Just wondering, keen to hear if other Dommes also find Dom men hugely attractive? It puts me at cross purposes, I will never switch - its not in my nature, but rules so many out of bounds for me (wont do vanilla anymore and I dont switch).

All thoughts welcome.

Mistress Sam


I am so glad you wrote this post.  I have definitely seen quite a few Doms on here that are quite attractive and  I don't think this means that I now have to become a switch just because they are so attractive.  I look at them and say "nice eye candy" and, some of them  prove to write very intelligently and eloquently also, makes it hard not to be attracted to them as I am attracted to intelligence in conjunction with good looks.  However, that being said, I am still very much a Domme and if a Dom approached me it would have to be with the understanding that we would be relating to each other as Dom/mes.

I don't think they're off limits, I just respect that they've chosen a status that I can't control <wink, wink> so it would be a harder relationship to establish and maintain but it is doable.  Many have proven it.



_____________________________

Mistress C.

It is not in the stars to hold our destiny but in ourselves.
William Shakespeare
------------------------
In a world of so many variables, why do you have to be the norm? Anonymous

(in reply to Samwhiplash)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 4:08:59 PM   
thetammyjo


Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		I'll be the weirdo then.

No, I don't find dominant men attractive in any sexual or romantic way.

I've been great friends with some dominant men but am not the least bit interested in them beyond friendship.

A lot men who call themselves dominant actually turn me off to even friendships with them. Dominant seems to be a term loosely used by too many folks and covers things like horny or sexist or shallow.

By the way, I feel the same about women, too, but the question was specifically about men.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to Samwhiplash)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 4:29:00 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline 		I find some Dominant men attractive just as I do submissive men. The problem with the Dominant ones is if they try to infict that dominance upon me it totally ruins things and ends in conflict. So I will stick with my submissive men as my own personal preference.

~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to thetammyjo)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 4:33:15 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Lashra

I find some Dominant men attractive just as I do submissive men. The problem with the Dominant ones is if they try to infict that dominance upon me it totally ruins things and ends in conflict. So I will stick with my submissive men as my own personal preference.

~Lashra



We have a nice chat... on an equal basis.. then it comes.... he wants to "explore his sub side"

_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to Lashra)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 4:53:55 PM   
amayos


Posts: 1553
Joined: 6/2/2004
From: New England
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Samwhiplash

Ive been Domme all my life, but only came to proper realisation what it is all about in the past few years.

Just wondering, keen to hear if other Dommes also find Dom men hugely attractive? It puts me at cross purposes, I will never switch - its not in my nature, but rules so many out of bounds for me (wont do vanilla anymore and I dont switch).


I have met several dominant females who, while relegating submissive males to the status of servants, clients or slaves, reveal a preference to only date dominant males.

(in reply to Samwhiplash)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 4:58:09 PM   
Lashra


Posts: 4900
Joined: 2/9/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LotusSong

We have a nice chat... on an equal basis.. then it comes.... he wants to "explore his sub side"

Tell him to explore his subs side all he wants, just make sure she's tied down good

~Lashra


_____________________________

“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It's one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it's another to think that yours is the only path.”






(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 5:00:36 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		I have found Dom men attractive.  Physically, they are not judged by a different standard than the sub men I find attractive.  The thing that usualy puts me off to them in relationships is their attitudes. I am perfectly happy to be someones equal in a relationship if we are both Dom.  However, the second they suggest I sub for them, even once, I am gone.  If they want to expolre their sub side, thats cool.  Me, I have no interest in finding out if I have a sub side or not.  Never have and never will... I have met a few Doms that understnad that and we have had a great time together.  Others it has been a power struggle from day one and it never lasted long.
But I think I'l stick to my subbie boy.  Ive finally found someone who makes me happy... Dom or sub, thats what counts.

DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to amayos)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 5:37:26 PM   
Skier


Posts: 52
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I like to see people meet worthwhile goals - either kinky or vanilla. Dominance in Females is continually undermined in the world and for some Women it's an integral part of their lives. I try not to make it more difficult. I also respect any guy who can make a woman happy. Seeing women meet their goals, e.g. career, education, fitness, relationships, etc and knowing that I helped in some way is gratifying to me and this extends to Dominant Women as well. And, yes, I find many Dommes sexy.

(in reply to DiurnalVampire)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 5:40:18 PM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Samwhiplash

Ive been Domme all my life, but only came to proper realisation what it is all about in the past few years.

Just wondering, keen to hear if other Dommes also find Dom men hugely attractive? It puts me at cross purposes, I will never switch - its not in my nature, but rules so many out of bounds for me (wont do vanilla anymore and I dont switch).

All thoughts welcome.

Mistress Sam

Depends on who they are, how they carry themselves and how respectful of my "don't try and dom me" rule I have!  I've dated enough really toppy, powerful men to be able to handle their dominance, even if it were in a LTR, so long as they're ok with the poly realm of me keeping a submissive or adding to the household with what suits me.  (And he's welcome to as well!)

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to Samwhiplash)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 7:06:25 PM   
porcelaine


Posts: 5020
Joined: 7/24/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Samwhiplash

Ive been Domme all my life, but only came to proper realisation what it is all about in the past few years.

Just wondering, keen to hear if other Dommes also find Dom men hugely attractive? It puts me at cross purposes, I will never switch - its not in my nature, but rules so many out of bounds for me (wont do vanilla anymore and I dont switch).



I switch and find that I prefer dominant men in my relationships. The characteristics I'm most attracted to are typically more prominent in successful powerful men. I don't mind submitting to them but I will not switch at all.

However, the opposite is true when I'm engaging female companionship. I find that my dominant side is far more evident. I will not submit to them. I do believe that it is possible to have a full dominant partnership where both parties share of explore their own needs for ownership with a submissive. In fact, it can be a wonderful way to grow together and share a common interest.

porcelaine

_____________________________

His will; my fate.

(in reply to Samwhiplash)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 7:22:53 PM   
MstrssPassion


Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline 		For me... if I find someone attractive... I'll make a move. I don't care if they are dominant or not. I have actually made advances toward a few dominant men & they responded in a way that I would expect any submissive man to respond.

As for on here... ladies, don't let the dom profile stop ya, might as well go for it because a large number of men with dom profiles are contacting the ladies & speak of bottoming or subbing desires/curiosity.

The way I look at it...everyone is fair game, they'll either say yes Ma'am or WTF are you thinking. At that point you know whether to turn up the charm or back off & laugh it all off as a joke.

Happy Hunting!!

_____________________________

MstrssPassion


(in reply to Samwhiplash)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 7:37:26 PM   
MistressLorelei


Posts: 997
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline 		A Dominant male, like any male, can be attractive in appearance, or even personality or charm.... but I know that having a relationship with one, wouldn't work for me.  So should I ever become attracted to one, I wouldn't bother pursuing anything beyond friendship.  Attraction is a wonderful thing, but if not coupled with similar relationship goals, the relationship is destined to fail.

The Doms who have contacted me about exploring their sub side are of no interest to me.  I am seeking the whole package for something long-term, not someone who yesterday was seeking a submissive female to dominate.

(in reply to MstrssPassion)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Being Domme... finding Dom men attractive - 9/5/2006 10:47:38 PM   
WildnWicked


Posts: 50
Joined: 2/26/2004
From: Lancaster, California
Status: offline 		Come to think about it.. it makes sense for an alpha to be attracted to another alpha.

Why wouldn't I want the best the pack has to offer? Why wouldn't I want another leader to be by my side.

Funny thing is, on another site there is this compatibility checklist.. we are 100% compatible.

_____________________________

We live in a society of victimization, where people are much more comfortable being victimized than actually standing up for themselves.-- Marilyn Manson

(in reply to MistressLorelei)
Profile   Post #: 20
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