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Intensity - 9/13/2006 8:31:55 AM

becca333

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Recently my Master and I had the most intense session I've ever experienced - I seemed to reach a whole new level of emotion and sensation. (Btw it was amazing, and wonderful, and I enjoyed every moment, even the very ouchie bits.)

Usually after special time together I'm on a total high for a while, but this time I felt different - I'd lost my equilibrium and it took almost 24 hours to feel settled again. I was so happy about the things we did, but I felt off balance emotionally.

What I'd like to know is... can you go too far? Not physically, that'd be easy to judge, but emotionally. Is there any danger in exploring new peaks of experience? How do you keep your psyche together - and should you try to? Or should you just go with it?

I like to keep pushing my limits, moving further one small step at a time, but now I'm wondering if there's some point at which I need to pull back.

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RE: Intensity - 9/13/2006 8:35:40 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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Unless you've got past abuse issues to worry about, as long as you have a strong and solid relationship together, you shouldn't have anything to worry about as far as damage goes.

And if you do have past abuse issues or an insecure relationship, you can still heal and move on and be functional, it will just take more time and work.

In a scene space, I say to just go with it. If in the scene space you become freaked out, you should communicate that as best as you can, but it's really not damaging.

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"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

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RE: Intensity - 9/13/2006 8:58:14 AM

ownedgirlie

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I have reached depths I did not know existed. Sometimes they were cathartic, sometimes frightening, sometimes simply glorious. It usually takes a day or two to recover, although there have been times it has taken me up to a week to recover, but I always find my way home. Enjoy the experiences and communicate your thoughts afterwards. I always journal mine and share them with him, so that he knows what's going on inside. I have discovered some wonderful places inside myself as a result.

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RE: Intensity - 9/13/2006 9:14:53 AM

Amaros

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The best drugs are in your head.

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RE: Intensity - 9/13/2006 10:24:53 AM

Mercnbeth

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quote:

What I'd like to know is... can you go too far? Not physically, that'd be easy to judge, but emotionally. Is there any danger in exploring new peaks of experience? How do you keep your psyche together - and should you try to? Or should you just go with it?

becca,
How GREAT for you and your Master!
No you can't go "too far". I look forward to those types when beth gets to that point. When they happen I encourage her with a whisper in her ear to "go deeper".

I don't know if anyone ever achieves a level of self awareness that eliminates all barriers and boundaries created by society, upbringing, religion, or just personal embarrassment. Each of us have a 'core'. These cathartic experiences help us reach that core. beth and I find them liberating.

Sometimes it is a scary process, but sharing the experience with someone who you have a emotional connection brings you closer to that person.

You don't have to worry about "keeping your psyche together". I'd argue that you are experiencing and discovering your 'true' psyche.

Be well!

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RE: Intensity - 9/13/2006 11:23:28 AM

ExSteelAgain

Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
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quote:

ORIGINAL: becca333

Recently my Master and I had the most intense session I've ever experienced - I seemed to reach a whole new level of emotion and sensation. (Btw it was amazing, and wonderful, and I enjoyed every moment, even the very ouchie bits.)

Usually after special time together I'm on a total high for a while, but this time I felt different - I'd lost my equilibrium and it took almost 24 hours to feel settled again. I was so happy about the things we did, but I felt off balance emotionally.

What I'd like to know is... can you go too far? Not physically, that'd be easy to judge, but emotionally. Is there any danger in exploring new peaks of experience? How do you keep your psyche together - and should you try to? Or should you just go with it?

I like to keep pushing my limits, moving further one small step at a time, but now I'm wondering if there's some point at which I need to pull back.

It sounds like it was fun. Can you tell us more about it? What toy or thing did it mainly?

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You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

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RE: Intensity - 9/13/2006 3:24:59 PM

submaleslaveuk

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Joined: 7/21/2006
From: Manchester UK
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i personally dont think there is a possibility of going too far emotionally. Just lay back and enjoy the ride hun!!!

Sometimes i think we try to analyse our feelins too much instead of just going with the flow! If you enjoy it, your partner enjoys it and no one is getting seriously hurt then just enjoy it!!

Take care and may more highs be coming your way soon!

Hugs

submaleslaveuk
darren

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RE: Intensity - 9/14/2006 6:34:03 AM

becca333

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You're right, it was fun - in a wild way.

I can't remember all the things we used, it was a long session. Mostly crop (short and long), cane, hand, tawse, a variety of paddles, restraints, butt plugs of varying sizes (from mmmyes to ouchohgodno), a footstool (kneel on it and put your arms and shoulders down onto the floor - it's a very interesting position that allows all sorts of fun things to happen.) And the rubber paddle most of all, hard and loud and long. That rubber paddle can send me to heaven and back. And long moments of waiting, not knowing what was coming next, not knowing where he was or what was being prepared. And the way he touched me, and how he'd just quietly say what he wanted - not ordering, just saying it so quietly, and I'd scurry to obey and get into the next position. He becomes the whole world, all there is around you is sensation and emotion, and he's the lifeline to security.

Oh, and some bloody brilliant sex now and then - he knows how to keep me on the boil, so to speak, for ages.

I'm very fortunate, I can trust him completely, he was the one who always knew when to stop; I was so deep in subspace I wanted it harder, more, keep going... he always knew just when I'd had enough.

But afterwards... I was surprised at how I felt, not the way I usually do, which is on top of the world and flying high. I was so quiet, and shaken, but satisfied. And sort of serene and calm.

I thought I'd reached my level, after years of doing this I'd peeled away the layers, found myself, rejoiced in my sub-ness, revelled in the sensations.

And then I hit this new, totally different kind of level, which I never even knew existed. Can't wait to go for it again!

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RE: Intensity - 9/14/2006 6:40:36 AM

becca333

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Joined: 4/11/2006
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Thank you all for the advice - I really did feel rocked off kilter and slightly lost. But I'm bouncing back now, and looking forward to next time.

When I first started in all this, I found the confidence to tap into part of my personality that I'd always ignored or suppressed. Now I'm wondering what's going to happen with this next big step deeper.

But that's part of the fun, isn't it - the personal growth as we experiment.

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