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undergroundsea -> RE: struggles submitting to women (9/17/2006 8:30:06 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Lashra
I think for some of us it is just engrained that we won't submit to the opposite sex and you can try to work around that if you can.
Your comment brings to me an interesting thought.
I am a male sub and do not submit to men. I imagine part of the reason is that I am simply straight, and part of the reason is an ego matter. I do not wish to take a secondary role to another man.
While an ego matter can have negative connotations, I use the term without any negative connotations.
I can see the want by a woman to not submit to a man to also be an ego matter--to not want to take a secondary role to the other gender. Perhaps also relevant is a question of with which gender one feels more competitive.
Thus, I think the ego influence on submission may be different for different people. For some people the ego is not comfortable to submit to the same gender, for some the ego is not comfortable to submit to the opposite gender.
My fascination with psychology and my curiosity has me pondering the responses.
In general (outside of BDSM), I do not wish to be treated as if I am a lesser person by men or women. With the BDSM response invoked, my sexual and psychological response to female dominance trumps or even removes the discomfort I otherwise feel when put in a subordinate role. With men, there is no such response to trump the first.
Cheers,
Sea
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