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littlesarbonn -> RE: "no strings housework" (9/25/2006 11:24:49 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: LaTigresse
Please note: If there is ANYONE that gets their kink on cleaning house.....SEE ME!
As I've mentioned numerous times before (but this issue keeps coming up like it's a brand new one...every two weeks), I'm one of those service-oriented submissives who serves with the sole purpose of pleasing the woman to whom he's dedicated himself to. I really don't think too many people have a "kink" for cleaning someone's house, but sincere submissives of this nature probably have a strong necessity to do whatever is necessary to make their controller as happy, satisfied and better off as possible. I started my very first serious relationship of this nature with a professional dominant who recognized through sessions that I was much more interested in serving her in whatever way made her happy than in getting "session benefits." So, when I mentioned after a few years that I didn't really think this was serving either one of us (doing sessions) and that I was going to probably find some other avenue where I might be of benefit (like marry a vanilla woman and make her life as pleasant as possible, even without any pursuit of bdsm elements), she offered to have me become her houseboy, instead of someone who did sessions. It was a really bizarre change (for me) to go from a paying customer to someone who came over two or three times a week and cleaned or did whatever else she needed done for her. 90 percent of the time, she hardly even touched me, or did anything that could be construed as "slave"-like other than direct me as to what needed to be done. And I did that for about a year, never really questioning the arrangement because I didn't know anything else, and she was so wonderful that just doing anything for her was the greatest reward I could imagine.
Like I said, she was a professional dominant, and this was the period where a lot of pro dommes were realizing that they could get paying customers to do the houseboy thing, too, so she actually was entertaining potential clients of this nature concerning this kind of thing (although I wasn't really aware this was the case at the time). I knew that other submissives were around doing chores from time to time, but it always seemed that they were chores intituted with an attitude, sparking punishments for "failure" and that sort of thing. What I didn't realize at the time was that my mistress and the other women working at her establishment were always seeking the "customer" who could also be the houseboy. I even started to notice that I was being asked to come fewer and fewer days a week, which I discovered through other channels had more to do with submissives who were paying customers who were pretty much doing the kind of thing I was.
One evening, I was there cleaning the entire upstairs floor (a huge, long task as the place was huge), and I kind of got the impression at the time that one of these "regulars" was in the basement area doing cleaning like usual. I was beginning to suspect that I might not be needed much longer, so I was savoring the bit I was doing, although as it started to feel I wasn't really necessary to her and her place anymore, I was getting close to reconsidering the whole relationship and focusing on my writing 24/7, realizing that there were just too many people like me that I was essentially a dime a dozen and easily replaced. That was when there was a huge commotion going on in the house, that I could even hear upstairs while I was running the extremely noisy vacuum. Then I heard the main door slamming a few minutes later, and after a few moments, my mistress came rushing up the stairs to where I was still working. She told me to stop working and put the vacuum away. After I did, she indicated to me that I was going to become her personal slave from this point forward.
It took me awhile to figure out what happened, but I really think she was working on replacing me back then, figuring that getting someone like me was easy because I had been so easy to find. She worked with this other guy, who was the latest attempt of many to find what she was seeking, and he had been doing what was desired for quite some time until he finally did something (which I don't know what it was) that revealed that he wasn't there for her or her needs, but he had been masking an ulterior motive the entire time. I think what finally pissed her off completely was that she had completely fallen for his routine.
And then she realized I'd been there all along. I didn't have ulterior motives. Sure, I would have loved to have been courted by her and would have married her on the spot, but she was my mistress, not my girlfriend, so that was never going to happen, and I was satisfied with where I existed in her life. I think every slave wants to be as significant to his or her mistress as possible, and once you realize that it's probably not going to go any further than where you are at a certain moment, if what you have right then and there is enough of what you seek, then everything is as perfect as it is ever going to be.
Unfortunately, a decade later, I find myself an outsider to the community again, and I suspect that I will probably not find what I've always been looking for. It seems like a lot of dynamics have changed, but I haven't really, other than to repair some of the baggage I've carried around in some previous relationships that was never necessary in the first place; you just need some time to figure that out.
So, finding someone who needs someone like me is difficult, even though I keep hearing conversations from dominant women who claim to be wanting to find exactly what I am. I don't really know how to approach people anymore. I try blunt honesty and a positive disposition, indicating my positives, which are many, and I try to show how I fit the categories of what they're seeking. But it rarely even garners a response, which leaves me often thinking that either they aren't really sure what it is they're seeking, but hear something and think that's it, but forget to incorporate that into their searching criteria, or I've outlived my usefulness in this capacity because the foundation of what I think I am has evolved, and I just never saw it happen as this type of submissive is different than what it used to be, and I'm some sort of dinosaur in the eyes of fundamental criteria.
I was going to just pass on this thread, as it seems to keep resurfacing over and over again, but I thought I'd comment at least one last time on it, because I still feel there's a relevancy issue that keeps getting missed.
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