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Aileen68 -> BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 4:37:56 AM)
I may have the opportunity, in the not too distant future, to go to Paddles in NYC. Is it safe for a submissive female to go to a club alone? And what on Earth would be appropriate to wear, being that I would be alone. I don't expect to play...not something I would be comfortable with, but it would be more for viewing. Where does one learn the proper protocol for a club?

Arastella -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 4:50:43 AM)
In my opinion, it may not be safe at all because there is no one to protect you, and a lot of creepy guys go to those kinds of clubs. Find a friend to go with or something, anyone.

LordODiscipline -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 4:51:45 AM)
quote: I may have the opportunity, in the not too distant future, to go to Paddles in NYC. Is it safe for a submissive female to go to a club alone? *As safe (if not safer) than it is for a single female to go out on the street. Michael runs a decent place and puts up with no "shenanagans".* quote: And what on Earth would be appropriate to wear, being that I would be alone. Anything you would wear on the street... or, anything you would like to wear to the club under a coat for the street... there is no dress code there. quote: I don't expect to play...not something I would be comfortable with, but it would be more for viewing. Where does one learn the proper protocol for a club? No protocol - just rules - and those are posted inside the place and are common for such clubs - -DO NOT touch other people's things (including their submissive) -Watch all you want, but stay out of the way of the scenes. -Clean up the stations after you use them -No wanking off -No penetration -If something is disturbing to you - walk the freak away. -If someone is disturbing you or violating the rules, let Michael or the staff know -Etc. ~J

topcat -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 5:06:54 AM)
Midear A.- Paddles is, IMO, safer than Disney, about as clean, but not as well lit... Wear what you find comfortable, anything you like, though if you are traveling alone, low-key and causual might be best. Go, see, have fun- Stay warm, Lawrence

LadyEllen -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 5:10:37 AM)
LoD said it all I think, but I'll add to be prepared for anything! Sounds like this is a pretty safe and sane club, but even so, staring wide eyed with your jaw hanging open at something "weird" is not a good look! LOL! E

LadyHugs -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 5:20:35 AM)
Dear Aileen68, Ladies and Gentlemen; I cannot add much to what those have posted previously, in regard to Paddles and Michael running a good club and reasonable rules. That said, I find it a good idea to take with you a key ring flash light or a small flashlight, so you can check on your footing inside the club if it gets to dark. I find it handy when roaming through my toy bags and have had an occassion where loss of power, comes in handy to light the way. Another thought, would be to inquire where the emergency exits are. If you have a staff member show you, it is a pleasant way to meet someone on staff and they have a chance to meet you, as to come to them if there is a need and, you'll be prepared in case of an emergency to exit the building in case of fire. You can always ask for advice as to who to watch or not. Respectfully submitted for consideration, Lady Hugs

deltadawn -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 5:28:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LordODiscipline quote: I may have the opportunity, in the not too distant future, to go to Paddles in NYC. Is it safe for a submissive female to go to a club alone? *As safe (if not safer) than it is for a single female to go out on the street. Michael runs a decent place and puts up with no "shenanagans".* quote: And what on Earth would be appropriate to wear, being that I would be alone. Anything you would wear on the street... or, anything you would like to wear to the club under a coat for the street... there is no dress code there. quote: I don't expect to play...not something I would be comfortable with, but it would be more for viewing. Where does one learn the proper protocol for a club? No protocol - just rules - and those are posted inside the place and are common for such clubs - -DO NOT touch other people's things (including their submissive) -Watch all you want, but stay out of the way of the scenes. -Clean up the stations after you use them -No wanking off -No penetration -If something is disturbing to you - walk the freak away. -If someone is disturbing you or violating the rules, let Michael or the staff know -Etc. ~J Ditto. We have only been able to get up to Paddles 4 times but each time it has been a pleasureable experience. Just take your common sense with you and enjoy. dawn

MstrssPassion -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 5:55:48 AM)
I would suggest to you what I would suggest to anyone going to a club for the first time, even a single male dom... first decide if you plan to leave alone before going. Once there...find a staff member, introduce yourself, inquire as to who else is on the floor if you have any questions/concerns as the night goes on & ask if they provide escort to your car at the end of the evening. Knowing that you plan to leave alone & letting the staff know may prevent someone tagging along on your way out. Often the hosts/managers of clubs will know regulars & make a quick introductions between them & a new person. I wouldn't go so far as to trust this group without question but it does at least give you a chance to familiarize yourself with others & give you a moderate safe zone to hang out in.

MisPandora -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 6:02:41 AM)
Yes, it is safe. You may be creeped out by the guys who approach you, but they're not going to accost you (well, unless you want them to.) If you're really concerned, talk to the person at the soda bar or coat check inside and tell them you're new. They're very good with novices. You could also go on a night that there is a group event like Dom Sub Friends there and make yourself known to the group hosts. Their website has a calendar.

MisPandora -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 6:03:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Arastella In my opinion, it may not be safe at all because there is no one to protect you, and a lot of creepy guys go to those kinds of clubs. Find a friend to go with or something, anyone. That's downright alarmist. Have you BEEN to Paddles or are you just speculating from afar?

MisPandora -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 6:05:40 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion Knowing that you plan to leave alone & letting the staff know may prevent someone tagging along on your way out. If she drives, there is a WELL lit parking lot literally at their door, and they have staff outside that will monitor you going to your car. We walked the several blocks back to Penn Station on the times that I've trained it up there and it's not bad at all (albeit cold when we go!) It's a well-lit area that is full of pedestrian and car traffic, and literally, every 5 minutes there's an NYPD car that seems to cruise around.

MstrssPassion -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 6:23:52 AM)
Well there ya go... inside a club, most any club... there is very little to fear. The only time I personally have had any issues with attending a place on my own was getting back to my car. That joker got the shock of his life when I popped a four footer in his direction... well that or he suddenly decided that he had somewhere else to go in the other direction & with a measure of urgency by the speed of his step. Every since that I have made it a point to check that there was an outside staff or an escort. Inside the clubs... sure there might be some creepy folk but for the most part the people there are good people & if they are alerted that someone is in distress they will intervene but it is better to turn to the staff than the patrons... patrons may actually think they are interfering with someone's scene & hesitate... the staff is always the best people to involve with any "sticky/uncomfortable" situations.

MisPandora -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 6:29:42 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion Every since that I have made it a point to check that there was an outside staff or an escort. Inside the clubs... sure there might be some creepy folk but for the most part the people there are good people & if they are alerted that someone is in distress they will intervene but it is better to turn to the staff than the patrons... patrons may actually think they are interfering with someone's scene & hesitate... the staff is always the best people to involve with any "sticky/uncomfortable" situations. Even the old Hellfire Club in the Triangle Building in the meat packing district used to be seedy/creepy, but not "dangerous". Lenny's staff there would make sure you were ok and would kick guys out the moment someone made a complaint. I miss those days when you could go to that underground, dark, damp, gross old place where you never knew what you were stepping on, seeing people doing dark deeds in dark corners. I found it put slaves in a really great space with little effort, and that's a little different than the clean clubs like Paddles and the beautiful Bacchus Studios there in NYC now.

jamesthehumanrug -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 6:30:11 AM)
greetings ;ive been to paddles or i must have; i know bell dejour didnt like it ;and a few doms dont like it for some reason i forgot;women escourt the men in ;its the men who need the escourt ,otherwise.... i totally forgot;i remember i liked it....if i can recall the rite place; quote: ORIGINAL: Aileen68 I may have the opportunity, in the not too distant future, to go to Paddles in NYC. Is it safe for a submissive female to go to a club alone? And what on Earth would be appropriate to wear, being that I would be alone. I don't expect to play...not something I would be comfortable with, but it would be more for viewing. Where does one learn the proper protocol for a club?

MisPandora -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 6:40:15 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: jamesthehumanrug greetings ;ive been to paddles or i must have; i know bell dejour didnt like it ;and a few doms dont like it for some reason i forgot;women escourt the men in ;its the men who need the escourt ,otherwise.... i totally forgot;i remember i liked it....if i can recall the rite place james, A pro femdom not liking a place is going to be a totally different subject....entirely. She probably doesn't like it because she can't troll for business! I know a number of the pros who are lifestyle (at least one who is on this board) who play there or teach there and enjoy the space.

Aileen68 -> RE: BDSM Clubs (9/25/2006 7:04:30 AM)
Thanks all for the responses. I used to go to school right around the corner so I'm very familiar with the area. I was more concerned with what it's like inside. I'm a little less nervous due to your answers.

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