How Common is This???

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How Common is This??? - 1/16/2005 9:23:26 PM

submom2

Posts: 62
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I was recently punished for something simple. The punishment wasn't harsh at all. Yet, the emotion it created in me was wierd. Though it wasn't very painful, I cried. I was brought to tears within minutes. Then, the emotion was anger. The punishment was warranted. I didn't obey simple instructions. I have never been punished before. As most of you know, I'm still new to the lifestyle. All I've ever had before, was play sessions. It hurt my feelings to be punished in the first place. Then, I ended up pissed at myself for not following such a simple request. I even started to think, I might not be cut out for it. Has anyone else had such feelings? I know, this might sound a bit silly. Though I had experienced a couple play sessions, I had never experienced the "reality" of D/s in real time. In play sessions, there's never a "down" (not so fun) time. At the first hint that I'm being made learn something, I freak out like that.

Can anyone shed some light on this one, without making me feel like a complete moron??

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RE: How Common is This??? - 1/16/2005 10:05:06 PM

Moleculor

Posts: 189
Joined: 5/23/2004
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That's just the alien parasite in your brain releasing various mood altering neuro-chemicals just prior to its exploding out of your left eyeball. Nothin' to worry about at all.

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RE: How Common is This??? - 1/16/2005 11:32:00 PM

liljoy

Posts: 577
Joined: 3/25/2004
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ahh it's the ups and downs of living the life. It's not always fun and games and it's not always easy. It does get easier as you settle into your role and learn the rules.

Only you can decide if it's worth it to you and something that you really want

lil_joy

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RE: How Common is This??? - 1/17/2005 12:28:10 AM

conflicted

Posts: 140
Joined: 10/31/2004
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~giggle~ Moleculor.

submom2, i get punished for simple little errors or oversights, dont get me wrong, im not complaining, but in the jist of things, i do actually deserve them.
i cry during them, though not from pain. i used to stress about it, and go through all the emotions you had, but at the end of it, though it may sound a little silly, i felt really good. So for me, i now just go with the flow, and the crying part seems to be some sort of a release for me, and truly, when Master gives me a cuddle etc. after my punishment, i feel on top of the world!
Hopefully your Master gave you a cuddle and explained to you why you were punished, that part for me early on, was what really helped me through.

*hugs*

n

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RE: How Common is This??? - 1/17/2005 4:00:24 AM

nella

Posts: 1243
Joined: 12/30/2004
From: Norway
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We learn in our sosiety aboute correct and noen corect behavior, we learn from we are infants. Much aboute a punishment in a D/s realtionship go against the things we have been indoctrinaeded whit sinse werry smal, when those triggers are pushed, natrualy we react.

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RE: How Common is This??? - 1/17/2005 1:34:44 PM

BeachMystress

Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
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*hugs* You're not strange or weird or unusual even. New subs often go through a period of adjustment to being submissive. Everything you mentioned is familiar to me. D/s is an emotional roller coaster.

Since you have only done a few scenes, and seem to be an emotional person, have a look at the following links. They are about aftercare and subdrop. I'd hate for you to experience it for the first time and not understand what is going on. As someone who experiences Topdrop, I can attest you want prior knowledge of the phenomenon
http://www.leathernroses.com/generalbdsm/jerseyaftercare.htm
http://www.domsview.com/issue20/feature20a.htm
http://www.iron-rose.com/IR/docs/aftercare.htm

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RE: How Common is This??? - 1/17/2005 6:27:48 PM

liltxsubby

Posts: 328
Joined: 11/18/2004
From: TX
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I'm farily new too and have experienced the same things. Aftercare is crucial.

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RE: How Common is This??? - 1/17/2005 8:35:19 PM

phoenix52

Posts: 179
Joined: 12/9/2004
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i had experiences much like this when i was new to 24/7.... mine was a little different, my Master and i disagreed about a piercing he wanted me to have, and i just could NOT accept that He wanted things a certain way, they were going to be that way.

The good news is that your mindset should change fairly quickly as you get used to your new lifestyle. Just be patient with yourself and give it time. As another poster said, what we do goes against everything you are programmed for by society, it does take time to adept to the new situation.

Good luck!

shannon

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RE: How Common is This??? - 1/18/2005 5:14:40 AM

submom2

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quote:

That's just the alien parasite in your brain releasing various mood altering neuro-chemicals just prior to its exploding out of your left eyeball. Nothin' to worry about at all.

I KNEW it!!!!

Thanks all for the support.

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RE: How Common is This??? - 1/18/2005 5:34:09 AM

submom2

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Thanks for the links. They were very informative.

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RE: How Common is This??? - 1/18/2005 4:27:08 PM

emeraldgreeneyez

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Joined: 1/15/2005
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Thank God you posted that as I too, have felt the exact same thing. I must admit, the only times I've been punished it was quite painful. Painful to the point that I am no longer with that particular Master. One time I wasn't even told why I was being punished. I later determined he was a sadist rather than a Master, which changed the whole reality of my life. The submissive in me made me stand and take it, but I knew that if I wasn't hugged and loved after, it wouldn't be for me. Without the heartfelt comforts that come after, there really isn't anything but the act of punishment. Be very careful and know that we all feel exactly as you from time to time. Although leaving a Master is much more difficult than leaving a vanilla relationship, there are times when it is necessary. Your emotional safety as well as your physical safety should be his priority. Take care of yourself and then taking care of him will come naturally. If he resists your need for after-care, he may not be worthy of what you are offering from the heart. emeraldgreeneyez

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RE: How Common is This??? - 1/18/2005 9:21:16 PM

realophelia

Posts: 168
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quote:

I was recently punished for something simple. The punishment wasn't harsh at all. Yet, the emotion it created in me was wierd. Though it wasn't very painful, I cried. I was brought to tears within minutes.

I find it much easier to cry when I'm being punished than I do during regular play. Even though regular play may sometimes hurt more.

quote:

It hurt my feelings to be punished in the first place. Then, I ended up pissed at myself for not following such a simple request.

For me, it's also about getting my feelings hurt. And I do get mad at myself sometimes as well.

~Ophelia

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