I'm the father of one of her kids! (Full Version)

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subfever -> I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/7/2006 12:39:39 PM)

I went into the supermarket the other day and noticed a stunning, blond haired, blued-eyed woman in the produce section waving at me. 

I walk towards her, taken aback, because I can't place from where I know her. So I ask, "Do you know me?" 

She replies, "I think you're the father of one of my kids."

Oh shit! Now my mind travels back to the only time I've ever been unfaithful to my wife. And we dated for many years before we got married.

I said, "Oh my God!!! Are you the young stripper from my bachelor party whose toes I sucked and ass I licked before doing it with you on the pool table while your partner whipped my butt with a cat-o-nine tails in front of all my buddies???"

She looked into my eyes quizzically, and softly said "No, I'm your son's math teacher."




swtsouthernsub -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/7/2006 12:43:53 PM)

ctfu =cracking the fuck up i loved it thanks for the laugh sorry for your possible  embarassment though lol thats to funny




subfever -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/7/2006 3:41:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: swtsouthernsub

ctfu =cracking the fuck up i loved it thanks for the laugh sorry for your possible  embarassment though lol thats to funny


It's just a joke, SSS. I've been divorced for over a decade, and my kids are all grown up... well chronologically, anyway... [;)]




LTRsubNW -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/7/2006 3:51:54 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever

I went into the supermarket the other day and noticed a stunning, blond haired, blued-eyed woman in the produce section waving at me. 

I walk towards her, taken aback, because I can't place from where I know her. So I ask, "Do you know me?" 

She replies, "I think you're the father of one of my kids."

Oh shit! Now my mind travels back to the only time I've ever been unfaithful to my wife. And we dated for many years before we got married.

I said, "Oh my God!!! Are you the young stripper from my bachelor party whose toes I sucked and ass I licked before doing it with you on the pool table while your partner whipped my butt with a cat-o-nine tails in front of all my buddies???"

She looked into my eyes quizzically, and softly said "No, I'm your son's math teacher."


Look pal...you may think you're being funny here but...I am the father of that child.

You think all this shit with Anna Nichole and two fathers is just fodder for the press? 

That boy is my son.

I want a paternity test.

My attorney will be in contact.




subfever -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/7/2006 3:59:04 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LTRsubNW

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever

I went into the supermarket the other day and noticed a stunning, blond haired, blued-eyed woman in the produce section waving at me. 

I walk towards her, taken aback, because I can't place from where I know her. So I ask, "Do you know me?" 

She replies, "I think you're the father of one of my kids."

Oh shit! Now my mind travels back to the only time I've ever been unfaithful to my wife. And we dated for many years before we got married.

I said, "Oh my God!!! Are you the young stripper from my bachelor party whose toes I sucked and ass I licked before doing it with you on the pool table while your partner whipped my butt with a cat-o-nine tails in front of all my buddies???"

She looked into my eyes quizzically, and softly said "No, I'm your son's math teacher."


Look pal...you may think you're being funny here but...I am the father of that child.

You think all this shit with Anna Nichole and two fathers is just fodder for the press? 

That boy is my son.

I want a paternity test.

My attorney will be in contact.


B-but she even mentioned our child during the nupitals! ... [sm=confused.gif]




LTRsubNW -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/7/2006 6:46:55 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever
B-but she even mentioned our child during the nupitals! ... [sm=confused.gif]


Accept it...my sperm outraced yours bud....it's All American stuff.

Deal with it...or I'll call TIME magazine.




impishlilhellcat -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/7/2006 7:05:52 PM)

Omg this is hilarious thanks for the much needed laugh




subfever -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/7/2006 11:26:30 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LTRsubNW

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever
B-but she even mentioned our child during the nupitals! ... [sm=confused.gif]


Accept it...my sperm outraced yours bud....it's All American stuff.

Deal with it...or I'll call TIME magazine.


Are you trying to tell me that I'm a malesub cuckold??

Okay, I've had just about enough of this. I challenge you to a DNA showdown! ... [sm=boxer.gif]




LTRsubNW -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/8/2006 6:09:02 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever

quote:

ORIGINAL: LTRsubNW

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever
B-but she even mentioned our child during the nupitals! ... [sm=confused.gif]


Accept it...my sperm outraced yours bud....it's All American stuff.

Deal with it...or I'll call TIME magazine.


Are you trying to tell me that I'm a malesub cuckold??

Okay, I've had just about enough of this. I challenge you to a DNA showdown! ... [sm=boxer.gif]


Petri dishes at 20 paces.




magpies -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/8/2006 10:51:59 AM)

That teacher uses the logarithm method of contraception.




subfever -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/8/2006 3:13:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: LTRsubNW

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever

quote:

ORIGINAL: LTRsubNW

quote:

ORIGINAL: subfever
B-but she even mentioned our child during the nupitals! ... [sm=confused.gif]


Accept it...my sperm outraced yours bud....it's All American stuff.

Deal with it...or I'll call TIME magazine.


Are you trying to tell me that I'm a malesub cuckold??

Okay, I've had just about enough of this. I challenge you to a DNA showdown! ... [sm=boxer.gif]


Petri dishes at 20 paces.


Well... if you can shoot it into a Petri dish at 20 freaking paces, I concede... [sm=whiteflag.gif]




Saratov -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/8/2006 4:34:26 PM)

What would you expect from someone with an alge-bra? [;)]




magpies -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/8/2006 7:29:32 PM)

No multiplication.




magpies -> RE: I'm the father of one of her kids! (10/8/2006 11:43:53 PM)

There's no danger of pregnancy now that she's the head -mistress.




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