Ill sub/slave

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

Ill sub/slave

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Ill sub/slave

Page: [1]

Login

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

Ill sub/slave - 10/15/2006 5:39:43 PM

aurora31

Posts: 266
Joined: 8/18/2005
Status: offline

First off let me say that this is not an attempt for attention or a poor little me type post.

I little over a montha ago I was diagnosed with stage 4 arenocortical carcinoma. It is a rare and extremely deadly cancer. I do intend tend to beat it but I am also a realist and know the odds are stacked against me. The five year survial rate is less then 10%.

Being a realist I also realize that my dream of being owned 24/7 may never come true. It is hard enough to find one who you are compatable with, one who shares the same views, goals, and interests. Let alone to ask a potential Dom/Master to take me on to invest the time, energy, and emotions to train me to be theirs knowing that they will lose me.

I understand this and have accepted this...but I have had many people tell me they think I am wrong in my thinking. That to alot it would not matter. So I ask how many Dom/Masters out there would take on a terminally ill slave? And I guess I could ask the same of the sub/slaves out there how many would choose to serve a terminally ill Master? Also for the sub/slaves out there how many of you would feel comfortable in asking a Dom?master to take on the burden of a treminallt ill sub/slave?

aurora

Post #: 1

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/15/2006 5:45:15 PM

sweetnurseBBW

Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

I don't know if there are Dominants that would take a terminally ill slave or not. I think you should not give up on yourself. Yes it is a very aggressive form of cancer but some have beat it. Concentrate on healing yourself and if one comes along just be upfront and honest about your condition. Good luck to you.

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to aurora31)

Post #: 2

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/15/2006 6:13:32 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

first off... aurora.. we are a bit shocked at the news and we send our best to you. Things have been going really good for you ever since you made the move and this is something that is indeed difficult to face. Just the thought of your little one makes me ache and pray that you come out as one of the lucky ones.

But to your question.

I think you being realistic. Your right in my opinion that few would want to engage themselves in a relationship with want one could consider as being a terminally ill individual. As much as I would love to say that you can have that 24/7 dream etc... personally I think it is just filling your head with false dreams and hopes. Your focus should not be on this dream... but take care of yourself and your little girl.

Yes it might be possilbe that you will find the right kind of guy... but each and every time we add things to your already complicated lives we will limit the size of the pool we get to fish in. You made an important move to St.Louis to increase the size of your pool.... and I have no doubt that in so doing you have increased the pool you fish in. Ironically, your condition being in the larger centre, you have a better chance at recovery than you did in the small place you came from. In a very real way.. your passion to live this lifestyle might be the very reason you saved you life or at least prolonged it. I would also say that you can find a way to live it very happily to the best of your ability.

Lastly, thou I think you are being realistic... that doesn't mean the odds are nil. Yes, you just might meet someone that wants to spend you days with you... no matter how short they may and do say May appear to be. I suspect your attitude and courage in facing this challenge will and does reflect extremely well of your character... but then.. I always thought well of your character.

we pray and hope for the best for you.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to aurora31)

Post #: 3

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/15/2006 6:23:57 PM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: aurora31

First off let me say that this is not an attempt for attention or a poor little me type post.

I little over a montha ago I was diagnosed with stage 4 arenocortical carcinoma. It is a rare and extremely deadly cancer. I do intend tend to beat it but I am also a realist and know the odds are stacked against me. The five year survial rate is less then 10%.

Being a realist I also realize that my dream of being owned 24/7 may never come true. It is hard enough to find one who you are compatable with, one who shares the same views, goals, and interests. Let alone to ask a potential Dom/Master to take me on to invest the time, energy, and emotions to train me to be theirs knowing that they will lose me.

I understand this and have accepted this...but I have had many people tell me they think I am wrong in my thinking. That to alot it would not matter. So I ask how many Dom/Masters out there would take on a terminally ill slave? And I guess I could ask the same of the sub/slaves out there how many would choose to serve a terminally ill Master? Also for the sub/slaves out there how many of you would feel comfortable in asking a Dom?master to take on the burden of a treminallt ill sub/slave?

aurora

I think there are people out there who believe that 5 minutes of something special is better than 50 years of mediocre. (Paraphrased from Steel Magnolias). I'd take the 5 minutes if it's all I was given and it would be 300 seconds of unsurpassed joy and I know that I'm not the only one who'd take it and feel blessed to have had it either.

Do what you need to do.. fight the good fight.. stay realistic, but also, stay positive. Attitude counts for a lot.

I wish you wellness and peace.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

(in reply to aurora31)

Post #: 4

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/15/2006 6:57:49 PM

TemptingNviceSub

Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline

My heart goes out to you and yours..In response to your question, although the odds of finding a Dominant willing and able to take on such a daunting task,there is always room for hope,sometimes one in a million will step up, and because you are you ,will be enough for him to take whatever time allows and count himself the better for it....My prayers.....Tempting

(in reply to BitaTruble)

Post #: 5

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/15/2006 7:49:34 PM

Rayne58

Posts: 746
Joined: 2/22/2005
From: Sydney Australia
Status: offline

quote:

And I guess I could ask the same of the sub/slaves out there how many would choose to serve a terminally ill Master?

My Master has end stage renal failure. We do not know how long we will have together but we intend to make the most of the time we do get.

He was diagnosed in 2001 and we met online in 2002. I moved to be with Him in January of 2004. We love each other very much and have a lot of fun together. He was totally honest with me about His health and has said He would not blame me one bit if I decided to leave. However that isn't going to happen. We take things one day at a time. We are getting married in less than 2 months.

Why should we deny ourselves this happiness, simply because one partner will have a shorter life span than the other.....I would rather have this time with Him than not have experienced how wonderful a loving caring relationship is.

Best of luck to you aurora, both in your fight and in your quest

(in reply to aurora31)

Post #: 6

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/15/2006 8:00:32 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

My former dominant's best friend lost his fiance to cancer, she had been in remission for three years when they met, and was diagnosed with reoccurance right before her 5 year window closed. I never had the honor of knowing her, although having been to this friend's home pictures of her were everywhere, even pictures of the two of them bald (he shaved his head when she lost her hair). He loved her deeply, and he stated over and over again how lucky he was to have her for the 3 years he did, even though he had to say goodbye to her.

I am sending you all the good thoughts I can, and I related the above because I do not think we should place limits on the human heart or doubt it. Someone may just walk through that door, and if you shut them out to keep them from feeling pain that may never even come, well they would not get the honor of knowing you or loving you. That is a decision that every dominant you talk to can make for himself, and if I know dominants, they do not like us making decisions for them.

Life has some incredible twists and turns and magical things happen every day if we can just stay open for those things (and I am talking to myself as much as anyone else). God speed and good luck.

julia

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 10/15/2006 8:01:38 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to aurora31)

Post #: 7

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/15/2006 8:02:48 PM

toservez

Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline

I know you didn't ask for it but my heart goes out to you and I wish you nothing but the best. Every person that I have known to beat something like you have was a fighter and had a great attitude and from what I inferred in your message is something you have. So you are off to a great start.

I do not really have anything new to say about your question. I would think finding someone will be difficult but nothing is impossble. It certainly would be tough for a person to sign up for something like that when the emotional level will be so great, but I do believe there are always people out there for every ocaison. Can never hurt to look and pursue and to find one how special would that Master be!

Good luck in both fronts.

Lin

(in reply to Rayne58)

Post #: 8

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/15/2006 8:07:28 PM

SlaveAkasha

Posts: 726
Joined: 9/30/2006
From: Indiana
Status: offline

I am sorry to hear this, aurora. I agree with everyone and hope that someone that will give you all of the happiness you deserve will come into your life. A short time of true happiness, cannot be measured against never having it. As long as there is life, there is hope, and you have tons of both left.

I wish you all the best, prayers and thoughts are with you.

Akasha

_____________________________

Look, if you want to torture me, spank me, lick me, do it. But if this poetry shit continues just shoot me now please.
~ Tank Girl

www.peta.org
www.goveg.com

(in reply to juliaoceania)

Post #: 9

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/15/2006 8:10:20 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

I understand this and have accepted this...but I have had many people tell me they think I am wrong in my thinking. That to alot it would not matter. So I ask how many Dom/Masters out there would take on a terminally ill slave? And I guess I could ask the same of the sub/slaves out there how many would choose to serve a terminally ill Master? Also for the sub/slaves out there how many of you would feel comfortable in asking a Dom?master to take on the burden of a treminallt ill sub/slave?

aurora

If the relationship is there, then it's there. I can understand why someone would choose not to embark on a relationship with someone knowing that they really wouldn't be around in the future, but I also know that if the relationship is simply there, then to deny it would be very wrong.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to aurora31)

Post #: 10

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/15/2006 9:37:01 PM

MistressTheaZ

Posts: 155
Joined: 7/17/2005
Status: offline

As others have expressed, I wish you the brightest blessings, strength and hope toward being able to face this and battle through it, despite any percentages indicating how difficult it may be. Having been ill at one time Myself, I can understand the crushing weight of considering dreams perhaps unrealized...

but I personally believe that experiences are judged by how deeply and intensely they touch and move us, not how long they last or what end result may be realized. While there are some who undoubtedly view a relationship as a journey toward something - marriage, a family, a life built together - there are many who instead place their value upon just finding a complementary heart. Concerns of where it may go or what it may be lie by the wayside when one is thoroughly consumed with love and affection; every day, every week, every month and every year one has with such a love is a blessing, indeed.

To have loved and felt such a depth of emotion? I personally would value each of those days together, each week, each month, every year. All of our lives will one day end, but I would be happier to have known such a love than to go without.

Best,

~Thea

(in reply to aurora31)

Post #: 11

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/15/2006 10:24:30 PM

diamonddreamlove

Posts: 770
Joined: 5/19/2006
Status: offline

Your post struck a nerve for me. My vanilla husband died unexpectedly in July. He never complained of feeling unwell and was to everyones understanding healthy. Even our family doctor was shocked that he died instantly from a massive heart attack. I guess what i am saying is that life does not come with guarantees other than that it will eventually end for us all. Had i known 10 years ago that my husband would die leaving me alone with our son i would still have married him because he was a good man and i loved him very much. He changed a lot in the last year and was not always very nice to be around but i would have given anything to have known his days were numbered so that we could have shared them at a deeper even more loving level. I would have taken the time to make sure his favorite meal was prepared and that his needs were met before he even knew they existed but that is just me. I don't know if there is a Master out there that will find you and love you and give you what you seek but i still have (perhaps naively) the belief that good things can happen with the bad. I am not saying that anyone turning you away because of your illness is bad because i would hope that a Master would know himself well enough to know if he could handle the responsibility or not. And the illness certainly adds to the responsibility but it also adds something else to the relationship and that is the intensity of living in the moment. I can not help but believe that there is a Master somewhere that would love you intensly if He is only fortunate enough to meet you. But in the mean time fighting for your life and taking care of your child will take much of your time and energy. Don't close your eyes to that responsibility and don't close your mind to the possibilities of finding One who is willing and happy to know you for who you are, not for what the illness does. I realise this is simplifying things but i still believe in good winning over bad. Keep in mind i am not saying anyone is bad for not feeling they can deal with the illness because i believe they are wise to know themselves that well.

< Message edited by diamonddreamlove -- 10/15/2006 11:01:29 PM >

_____________________________

"Many attempts to communicate are nullified by saying too much." Robert Greenleaf

(in reply to MistressTheaZ)

Post #: 12

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/16/2006 5:08:20 AM

AnAtlantaDom

Posts: 98
Joined: 7/13/2006
Status: offline

Aurora,

I add my empathy, well wishes, positive thoughts, and prayers with all the others. I also agree that because the future is unknown there is always that tiny dot of light out in the distance called HOPE. Keep your faith and hopes as high as possible and continue forward to the best of your ability.

As you can see by the posts you many who care for you here as I suspect you have in your daily life. Allow us and your other frieds to help you maintain a positive attitude! Remember the mind is more than the greatest sex organ you have. It is also an additional means to recovery in an illness.

I would suggest you seek counselling as well as medical help. There are many support groups, find one in your area.

Best wishes
AD

(in reply to diamonddreamlove)

Post #: 13

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/16/2006 5:54:06 AM

becca333

Posts: 1050
Joined: 4/11/2006
Status: offline

My thoughts and prayers are with you - I'm so sorry this is happening to you, and I admire your strong and positive attitude.

I really hope you find a Dom who will understand, and meet your needs. Don't give up on that hope, you never know what's coming your way.

(in reply to AnAtlantaDom)

Post #: 14

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/16/2006 7:08:40 AM

aurora31

Posts: 266
Joined: 8/18/2005
Status: offline

Thank you all for your kind words and suport. I fully intend to beat this thing and if not atleast give it one hell off a fight. Right now things are good as far as we can tell we got everything out and I won't be doing chemo or radition yet either so I feel great other then a little tenderness in my belly.

I have been very lucky in my friends and the suport I have found with in the local comunity here. They are the best.

To KoM I have thought many times over the last sevral weeks how lucky I was that I finally got brave enough to explore the lifestyle and to of found the courage to move to St Louis. And I know that it most likely did save my life. When the tumor was removed it was 15 cm and had invaded my liver. And even being in a major metropolitain area the type of cancer I have is so rare the my doctors have only seen a couple of cases of it. I can't imagine what it would be like if I had not moved or the miles I would be putting on my car to seek treatment. I do not intend to give up on my dream to be owned but it is not my only focus nor is my battle I fully intend to live my life to the fullest no matter how long or short it may be. And on that note I do believe there was a challange issued a while back that I would still love to win, and I WILL win it.....*weg*

Again thank you all for your words of encouragement and I look forward to hearing everyones opinions on this matter.

aurora

(in reply to becca333)

Post #: 15

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/16/2006 8:08:40 AM

HalloweenWhite

Posts: 1028
Joined: 6/20/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: aurora31

First off let me say that this is not an attempt for attention or a poor little me type post.

I little over a montha ago I was diagnosed with stage 4 arenocortical carcinoma. It is a rare and extremely deadly cancer. I do intend tend to beat it but I am also a realist and know the odds are stacked against me. The five year survial rate is less then 10%.

Being a realist I also realize that my dream of being owned 24/7 may never come true. It is hard enough to find one who you are compatable with, one who shares the same views, goals, and interests. Let alone to ask a potential Dom/Master to take me on to invest the time, energy, and emotions to train me to be theirs knowing that they will lose me.

I understand this and have accepted this...but I have had many people tell me they think I am wrong in my thinking. That to alot it would not matter. So I ask how many Dom/Masters out there would take on a terminally ill slave? And I guess I could ask the same of the sub/slaves out there how many would choose to serve a terminally ill Master? Also for the sub/slaves out there how many of you would feel comfortable in asking a Dom?master to take on the burden of a treminallt ill sub/slave?

aurora

aurora,

First let Me say I'm very sorry about your illness and that, despite that you show amazing streangth and determination. Cancers can be beaten, even rare ones; Jamie Gertz was in a movie about a woman with a very rare form of cancer. The move was called "Silence Like Glass" ans also starred Martha Plimpton;Keanu Reeves' wife in the movie Parenthood.

It's a true story and the women it was about beat the cancer and went on to have a normal happy and productive life.

As for your main question, none of us actually knows how long we have-I have a condition called Spina Bifida, which is a broken spine and have almost no sensation from the waist down, I was 37 on 24 sept. because of the nerve damage I cant feel My kidneys so I dont know if anything is wrong, Ive seen most of My school friends with the same condition die-one died a few months ago just after announcing he was getting married. An old college fiend died a year or two ago-he was in his early 30's.

I'm not beaten yet, nor do I intend to be; I'm sticking around to bug the hell out of as many people as I can lol.Ive set up My own business and I'm writing a play. I would be amazed if someone said they thought it was to much to be My submissive in case I pop My clogs, afterall, no-one expects you to just give up on things and live in a card-board box "cos you might die".

What matters is the time on earth and how we use it, I think. You seem very serious about being with someone, it would be foolish to ignore your honesty and determination.

HalloweenWhite.

(in reply to aurora31)

Post #: 16

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/16/2006 11:10:37 AM

jesskitty

Posts: 185
Joined: 9/4/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross

quote:

I understand this and have accepted this...but I have had many people tell me they think I am wrong in my thinking. That to alot it would not matter. So I ask how many Dom/Masters out there would take on a terminally ill slave? And I guess I could ask the same of the sub/slaves out there how many would choose to serve a terminally ill Master? Also for the sub/slaves out there how many of you would feel comfortable in asking a Dom?master to take on the burden of a treminallt ill sub/slave?

aurora

If the relationship is there, then it's there. I can understand why someone would choose not to embark on a relationship with someone knowing that they really wouldn't be around in the future, but I also know that if the relationship is simply there, then to deny it would be very wrong.

i like this sentiment. love is something that can happen regardless of what a person is. the person could be poor or rich, sick or healthy, overall 'good' or 'bad' personality. i think there is someone out there for everyone that searches it. therefore i think it's possible for someone to love and be in a relationship with someone that is termainly ill, of course i belive not everyone will, but i think taking the time to get in a relationship is better therfore when you find someone it will be better because the bond will be stronger accepting both the situation and circumstances. good luck.

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 17

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/16/2006 11:26:11 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

I want to say to you that I am sorry that you are being forced to play with this hand that you've been dealt. I am indeed glad though that you have decided to play and not fold. I don't put alot of stake in odds myself. If there is one person who has ever survived what you are dealing with, then to me, no matter what those figures say you have every bit as much of a chance to beat it as they did. Cancer is a tough thing, we are dealing with it right now in my family too.....but it's not an unbeatable thing.

Would I take a chance on loving someone who is classified as terminal? Well....life itself is terminal isn't it? None of us have any guarantees of a tomorrow....or even of a later on today. I find life much more fulfilling to look at what I have rather than what I might not.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to aurora31)

Post #: 18

RE: Ill sub/slave - 10/16/2006 11:44:05 AM

freyjasdottir

Posts: 253
Joined: 8/29/2006
From: PA
Status: offline

Best of luck to you. Your attitude will serve you well not only with beating cancer but in finding the perfect person for you.

(in reply to mistoferin)

Post #: 19

Page: [1]

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> Ill sub/slave

Page: [1]

Jump to:

New Messages	No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages	Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages	Locked w/o New Messages

Post New Thread

Reply to Message

Post New Poll

Submit Vote

Delete My Own Post

Delete My Own Thread

Rate Posts

Collarchat.com © 2025

Terms of Service

0.078