RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (Full Version)

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MasterNdorei -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (10/29/2006 9:32:59 PM)

i am willing to wager he is married, but even if he is not... 

If a Dom is managing to make other things happen in their life, but can not manage to meet a submissive who has already proven herself, the sub will never be a priority to this man.

If the Dom is unable to make time for anything else in his life, and the sub is falling into that category, chances are they do not have the kind of time a relationship would need anyway.

There is no easy way out. i am sending best wishes and hugs your way...

Master's dorei



toservez -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (10/29/2006 9:50:08 PM)

Personally I cannot see a reason that is good enough for him not to have seen you. Seven hours away just is not far enough for most of the legit reasons that others have mentioned and experienced. Unless there is some very legit reason that you know of but have not shared. I cannot believe that you or him cannot afford to hop in a car and drive that and that niether of you have had a weekend off or two other days or even met half way.

Respect is a two way street and him making you jump through hoops like this when it seems that you have done plenty and communicated your need to see him in real time. Like Juliaoceania said if your needs are not being met then you need to fix that one way or the other and quite frankly if this person cannot take your needs and desires into consideration you are probably better off without him. There is just something way wrong here. Sorry for being so blunt.





Owned1 -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (10/29/2006 9:51:45 PM)

I have a couple of questions that should shed a bit of light,  do you have his home phone number, full name and address?
Do you know more about him other than online Dom, for example what he does for work, what his hobbies are, what he does in his spare time, information about his past, relationships, kids family etc?

Are you able to contact him at anytime at his home?

I would suggest unless, after a year you have most of this information if not all then he is married or simply playing online.  With no intention of meeting real time.

If you do have all of this information and yet still you wait, if it is too long for you then perhaps it is time to have an honest open discussion with him and state your feelings.

At the end of that discussion then it may be up to you to make a decision that works for you.  You are a submissive not a door mat. 

I wish you the best in this difficult time

Owned



MasterRobert1 -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (10/30/2006 3:40:01 AM)

Lots of people playing games online. And this Dom sounds like one of them. I think it's time to move on.



Kalira -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (10/30/2006 4:50:37 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Imsosly4u

it has been almost a year and i've yet to see my Master face to face.
when i have talked to Him about this, He says that i have to earn it,
okay, i have completed every task and am still waiting.  How long is to
long?  i never was seeking an internet Dom, and that was not supposed to
be how would be. 

What utter BS. Cut him loose. Master and I waited a whole three days, and we live in seperate states.



MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (10/30/2006 5:21:02 AM)

You're getting the run around.  But you know that already. 

If this person wanted a real life relationship with you, he'd have taken steps to make that happen long before this.

I basically have a 75-mile radius of distance where I'd consider someone - this is dictated by my living arrangements and also by a hectic school/work schedule.  If I'm going to meet someone, I'm going to meet them fairly quickly - no longer than a month after first contact, and for nothing more than coffee or lunch.  An hour conversation face to face tells me much more about about a person than months and months online will ever tell me.  I also think it's a numbers game - the more people you meet, the more likely you'll meet someone that clicks with you.   But you won't find that endlessly typing online.



Aubre -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (10/30/2006 5:22:48 AM)

I'd say move on. You obviously want r/t and he doesn't. Move to someone who does - but make it clear that you won't wait that long before a r/t meeting. Save time, life is short.



MasterTonyS -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (11/1/2006 7:44:15 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: toservez

Personally I cannot see a reason that is good enough for him not to have seen you. Seven hours away just is not far enough for most of the legit reasons that others have mentioned and experienced. Unless there is some very legit reason that you know of but have not shared. I cannot believe that you or him cannot afford to hop in a car and drive that and that niether of you have had a weekend off or two other days or even met half way.

Respect is a two way street and him making you jump through hoops like this when it seems that you have done plenty and communicated your need to see him in real time. Like Juliaoceania said if your needs are not being met then you need to fix that one way or the other and quite frankly if this person cannot take your needs and desires into consideration you are probably better off without him. There is just something way wrong here. Sorry for being so blunt.




That's the whole thing in a nutshell. Speaking personally, I have met a few people here after spending a number of weeks talking and after a couple of days. There are also a few whom I have yet to meet because of either distance or an economic issue or work committments, etc.

What it comes down to is that you need to decide whether or not He's really interested in you for real, or if you're just an online distraction for him.

My thought? He's a player. Drop him...



popeye1250 -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (11/1/2006 10:06:54 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: toservez

Theoretical answer: What two people are comfortable with.

Realisitical answer: Sooner than later if the people are serious. Measured more in weeks then months.

My guess in your situation: Married person having fun on the Internet.





I agree with toserve. If the guy doesn't want to meet he's married or has a girlfriend.
If, after two months they don't want to meet (Male or Female)  you should cut off contact.
Two months is a very reasonable time for anyone.
Move on.



amuzingtoyou -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (11/1/2006 10:18:14 AM)

i have a hard time understanding how you can call someone your "master" that you have never met. What is it exactly he is a master of? I wish you luck on this as i am sure your heart is invested in this relationship. However, if soemone is not willing to meet you after a year of courtship...he is either hiding something or isn't real. You have to earn it? That is a bunch of bull...cut your losses and learn from this experience. I truly do wish you luck.
missi.



kisshou -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (11/1/2006 11:19:43 AM)

for me two weeks is too long



ExSteelAgain -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (11/1/2006 1:06:19 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: amuzingtoyou

i have a hard time understanding how you can call someone your "master" that you have never met. What is it exactly he is a master of? I wish you luck on this as i am sure your heart is invested in this relationship. However, if soemone is not willing to meet you after a year of courtship...he is either hiding something or isn't real. You have to earn it? That is a bunch of bull...cut your losses and learn from this experience. I truly do wish you luck.
missi.


You wouldn't think it, but this starts lots of debates. Some of our esteemed posters are into this. (I'm don't claim to be an esteemed one, if there was any doubt.)



BlkTallFullfig -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (11/1/2006 1:11:52 PM)

I think you're being played for a fool, and have wasted a year of your life on someone who is probably married and has no intention of leaving his situation to dominate/have a relationship with you.
One year is way too long to wait and see if you and someone else have the goods to make it in a relationship... Very hard to believe you are this patient at 39...  I stopped investing one year or more on anyone with whom my needs were not being met, because time is precious.    M



crouchingtigress -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (11/1/2006 2:18:49 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Imsosly4ui have tried to speak to Him about this and get frustrated, and it seems that when i get real honest about my feelings
it doesn't make Him too happy,


this is the calling card of a player.
 
after all if he really was that into you, wouldnt he care about your frustration and pain?
 
yes he does care about you, but not as much as he cares for himself, and couple that with honesty not being a comfy place for him to go with you....adds up to....well you do the math.
 
 



akisha -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (11/1/2006 3:09:05 PM)

It took Sir and myself 6 weeks to meet but that had to do with job scheduling and babysitters, not that we didn't want to. He also lives about 7 hours from me. We met for lunch in a town half way, so that there was no pressure. Breakfast was nice too *g*

I've found that if you haven't met in under 6 months chances are you never will. There is always an exception to the rule but still.

Good luck



orfunboi -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (11/1/2006 3:50:24 PM)

Turn off your computer, go out into the real world and meet some real people. Your in California...there are munches and clubs all over.



Windygal -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (11/1/2006 5:38:47 PM)

got one word for ya MARRIED I usually meet someone for a casual meet fairly soon, with in the first month or so of chatting, not to play just to meet.Good luck

Miss Diane



GoddessTeaze -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (12/8/2007 1:52:20 AM)

Why cant I find your profile anymore ?
 
A true Dom/me seeks real life, and wouldn't want to too long
to look the otherone in the eye, and see where
that would lead. So don't let them play with you girl!
 
Goodluck & warm greetingz
 
GoddezzT`



laurell3 -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (12/8/2007 1:55:10 AM)

Probably because the post is from October.  Just a word of warning, "true Dom/me"s don't go over well on these forums.  There is no one answer that applies to all.  We are an incredibly varied and somewhat schizo group like that.




Jill805 -> RE: How long is to long to wait to meet r/t? (12/8/2007 2:02:39 AM)

Do you have his home phone number and can call him at anytime day or night? Full  address etc.  If the answer to any of those is no, then you are getting the run around - sorry!



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