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Switches: Emphasis on one Role in Phases - 11/3/2006 6:49:18 PM   
Catwoman69y2k


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In the beginning, I never really tried to put myself into the domme category even though all the feelings regarding BDSM leaned towards that part of the spectrum.  I had a few instances where I would domme s omeone but they werent often enough for me to go ahead and say "Im a domme".  I would have fleeting urges of submission but they always seemed to wan away as soon as there was opportunity to act it out.

A few years after that I had gone and got my nipples pierced.  The sensitivity was through the roof so much that I often lost the upperhand in any type of sexual situation (BDSM or non) due to the fact that my submission was only a nipple careess away.  So, thats how I embraced my submissiveness.

However, I have noticed as a result of me having more and more experiences of submission (inadvertant or otherwise), I lean more towards submission these days.  I kind of wonder if people who are a switch change thier emphasizing role every now and again instead of always being a switch-top or switch-bottom. 

Experiences?
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RE: Switches: Emphasis on one Role in Phases - 11/3/2006 7:06:18 PM   
LadyOunce


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I used to consider myself a switch for many, many years. Due to circumstances and my own evolution as a person, I only identify as dominant these days.
 
I think, for some switchs, it often goes like that.

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Do not consider painful what is good for you. -Medea

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RE: Switches: Emphasis on one Role in Phases - 11/3/2006 7:06:32 PM   
BDSM05478


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For me it depends on the person i am with or around. My Husband will always be my Owner and Master, I could never ever Domme/ Top Him, it is just His nature that makes it that way. He is more aggressive than I am. Pure Dominate Alpha Male. Then there is another male, a past sub of mine, that hopefully will return to me once his military tour is over, that will always be submissive to Me. I can never see him any other way, as he has a pure slave heart..... Now while i may be a slave to my Master i do not think i could ever sub to another woman, maybe i could bottom to Her but not submit. Though i am sure i would have no problem Topping another woman as it is my nature to be the aggressive Alpha female. As far as I think, whatever works for you and makes you happy, why question it.

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RE: Switches: Emphasis on one Role in Phases - 11/3/2006 7:20:34 PM   
Catwoman69y2k


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This is something I wanted to start in a seperate thread. 

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RE: Switches: Emphasis on one Role in Phases - 11/3/2006 7:29:37 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


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I'm confused, what do you mean by "emphasizing role"?

I switch based on whatever relationship happens to form and whatever energy is going on about us at that particular time.  SOmetimes I form a solid static relationship, and sometimes I form a highly fluid one.

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RE: Switches: Emphasis on one Role in Phases - 11/3/2006 7:36:02 PM   
Catwoman69y2k


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emphasizing role was the shortest way I could describe "the role a switch prefers or falls into most of the time" in the subject line. ;)

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RE: Switches: Emphasis on one Role in Phases - 11/4/2006 9:32:51 AM   
ImpGrrl


Posts: 575
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I don't see how "sexual arousal" = "submission"?

Sir feels reallllllly good when I do stuff to his body.  But I'm doing it because it makes him feel good, and because he wants me to.

His being aroused and having things done to him doesn't = him submitting.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Catwoman69y2k

In the beginning, I never really tried to put myself into the domme category even though all the feelings regarding BDSM leaned towards that part of the spectrum.  I had a few instances where I would domme s omeone but they werent often enough for me to go ahead and say "Im a domme".  I would have fleeting urges of submission but they always seemed to wan away as soon as there was opportunity to act it out.

A few years after that I had gone and got my nipples pierced.  The sensitivity was through the roof so much that I often lost the upperhand in any type of sexual situation (BDSM or non) due to the fact that my submission was only a nipple careess away.  So, thats how I embraced my submissiveness.

However, I have noticed as a result of me having more and more experiences of submission (inadvertant or otherwise), I lean more towards submission these days.  I kind of wonder if people who are a switch change thier emphasizing role every now and again instead of always being a switch-top or switch-bottom. 

Experiences?


(in reply to Catwoman69y2k)
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RE: Switches: Emphasis on one Role in Phases - 11/4/2006 9:44:18 AM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ImpGrrl
His being aroused and having things done to him doesn't = him submitting.


in the literal use of the word...i think it does....and i dont think there is anything wrong with a master submitting to a slave except in acute cases of alltooseriousitis

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RE: Switches: Emphasis on one Role in Phases - 11/4/2006 10:28:03 AM   
LadyEllen


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From: Stourport-England
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This is where I get problems I suppose - I vary in what I want all the time. Sometimes a domme, sometimes a dom, sometimes a female sub, sometimes a male sub! I dont see a pattern in the variations as yet, but having just learned I may have a cycle after all, (HRT - wonderful thing!), its something I'm going to monitor, as I understand that where one is in a cycle can have effects on who one might prefer as a partner, for het women. Throw in bisexual leanings and a bdsm switch nature, and I guess the variations in desires could be down to hormonal variations?
E

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RE: Switches: Emphasis on one Role in Phases - 11/4/2006 10:42:23 AM   
Catwoman69y2k


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quote:

ORIGINAL: ImpGrrl

I don't see how "sexual arousal" = "submission"?

Sir feels reallllllly good when I do stuff to his body.  But I'm doing it because it makes him feel good, and because he wants me to.

His being aroused and having things done to him doesn't = him submitting.




I agree.  Sexual arousal doesnt necessarily = submission.  However, I suppose in my case it does. 

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RE: Switches: Emphasis on one Role in Phases - 11/5/2006 7:53:59 PM   
theRose4U


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If I'm reading between the lines correctly I think you're meaning something more like I experience a couple times a year and the reason I identify as a Switch.  In my relationships on a regular basis, I'm Domme. They are my toys, companions, and I love service as the icing on top. Nothing better after a long day than a massage, dinner and a sexy boy with a mop.
HOWEVER, occasionally I receive the call from my alpha. Usually it's a vacation, he needs a break and somehow he just knows when I need to be able to drop everything and just relax. The domme in me is brought under control in the first few hours and I relax in knowing what is needed, expected and desired and the warmth of his embrace. He tells me that it's amazing for him knowing that I willingly wait on him hand and foot (sometimes even literally). Only bringing out my "inner force of nature" when he's not taking care of himself. Getting right back in line with a swat on the tush and the comment of "you know better young lady".
In that relationship I'm in my element, pliable and ready for anything. I know that I'm a powerful force to be reconed with and have the strength that comes with knowing an even stronger man has my back.

When I return from the land of oz I'm back to dominant lady responsible for  the actions of others and all the stresses that come with it. If I'm in a relationship I don't go, but the tug is one of the greatest struggles that I experience.

< Message edited by theRose4U -- 11/5/2006 7:56:51 PM >


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