RE: Sub Performance on Same Sex (Full Version)

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littlespike -> RE: Sub Performance on Same Sex (11/7/2006 8:18:28 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: kirkzhom

hard limit


i think that limits are important and something that needs to be respected on both sides of the relationship.  If something makes you feel uncomfortable then you need to express that. 

i feel that truthful communications are very important to a relationship.  In fact to me this is a corner-stone of the relationship; i.e. true communications.  If something makes you uncomfortable; you need to express this....

spike




Celeste43 -> RE: Sub Performance on Same Sex (11/8/2006 8:27:56 AM)

Sorry, that same equipment line doesn't wash. Is she bisexual? Because if she is not, then she ought to try it herself. If she is, then she ought to try to please someone she finds repellant and see if having the "same equipment" changes anything. I'm betting it doesn't.

More importantly, this is an important subject and one she should have brought up at the beginning. Telling someone "you didn't limit amputation so I'm going to cut off your arm and you can't object" just doesn't cut it. It should have been discussed upfront, if neither of you thought about it then, that makes now the time to have this conversation.

Myself, I'm female and heterosexual, doesn't matter that I have the same equipment as another woman, I'm still not having sex with her. And I would still be upset and angry if he tried to force me into it.




peterK50 -> RE: Sub Performance on Same Sex (11/8/2006 9:40:27 AM)

Good luck trying to excite someone who isn't interested. Look up frustrating in the disctionary




BalletBob -> RE: Sub Performance on Same Sex (11/8/2006 12:58:18 PM)

I was hesitent at first too, when MADAM asked me to do something with her husband. I never done anything with a man before, but I was curious and tried it, with a Condom of course. It wasn't anything special aftwards, and seem to come pretty easy. I know they might not like the same things you do, but I did what I would like done to me, and it worked out pretty well. Now that it is over with, I won't worry the next time I get a Mistress, and "SHE WANTS" me to do it.

BalletBob




Jasmyn -> RE: Sub Performance on Same Sex (11/8/2006 1:42:20 PM)

Kirkzhom I think the Mistress has some responsibility in helping a sub through something like this... words of encouragement, setting the scene, knowing when to push the issue, knowing when to leave it alone....




littlespike -> RE: Sub Performance on Same Sex (11/8/2006 8:06:13 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

I would still be upset and angry if he tried to force me into it.


That is what i mean.  Simply expressing your feelings to your Dom would prevemt any anger and upset from occuring.  That is why communication is sooooo important to an relationship.





Celeste43 -> RE: Sub Performance on Same Sex (11/9/2006 6:32:00 AM)

I said if meaning that had it happened we did not already discuss this. As it happens monogamy is essential to me and we did discuss it. But this is a lot different than saying, pick up crunchy peanut butter instead of the usual creamy just for a change. It's so major a thing that it is a deal breaker for many people. So for a dom/me to demand it out of the blue without discussion just doesn't seem right.

And even if he did come home and say he changed his mind, and needs a threesome, discussing it would not change my feelings. I would still feel angry and upset and if he forced me into it, I would resent him enormously which could easily lead to the end of the relationship since resentment is so poisonous. No amount of discussion would change how I feel.




bringmetomyknees -> RE: Sub Performance on Same Sex (11/9/2006 8:09:18 AM)

i had this experince after my Mistress continued to ask me to do it. It took some time but it finally happened. I think her friend was bi, he had no trouble getting hard. I was tied and on my knees, bum against my heels, as he was standing. Mistress held my head as he....well you understand. It was not as bad as I thought it would be but I did not feel like I had to please him, just my head held in place was all he needed. I think hearing my Mistress urge us on was great. I did make sure he wore a condom so I did not have to taste anything. I was at some point asked to watch my teeth...lol, i guess you must learn....it has not happened again.




LotusSong -> RE: Sub Performance on Same Sex (11/9/2006 11:27:14 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: peterK50

Good luck trying to excite someone who isn't interested. Look up frustrating in the disctionary


I agree.  NOTHING is worse than getting head from someone who isn't "into" it.




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