19 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

19 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> 19 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

Page: [1]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

19 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity - 11/11/2006 8:03:28 PM

LotusSong

Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline

19 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity 1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN".

5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for smuggling diamonds".
7. Finish all your sentences with "in accordance with the prophecy".

8. Don't use any punctuation.
9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10. Order a Diet Water whenever you go out to eat - with a serious face.
11. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go".

12. Sing along at the opera.
13. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day at work.

14. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
15. Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

16. Have your coworkers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Bottom.

17. When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won! I won!"
18. When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, "run for your lives, they're loose!!"

19. Tell your children over dinner "due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."

Profile

Post #: 1

RE: 19 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity - 11/12/2006 5:19:19 AM

siamsa24

Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline

quote:

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

The scary part is, I actually do this if I feel that the store is getting a little boring.

(in reply to LotusSong)

Profile

Post #: 2

RE: 19 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity - 11/15/2006 6:11:20 AM

LTRsubNW

Posts: 1604
Joined: 5/6/2006
Status: offline

Occasionally, when I sent the check in to the power company, I put in the "For" line "3 kilos of Venezuelan cocaine".

I have a buddy who, when we run through the drive through, he finishes his request with "and I'd like that to go please".

< Message edited by LTRsubNW -- 11/15/2006 6:12:37 AM >

_____________________________

Small deeds will always mean more than large intentions.

(in reply to siamsa24)

Profile

Post #: 3

RE: 19 Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity - 11/15/2006 5:19:35 PM

Termyn8or

Posts: 18681
Joined: 11/12/2005
Status: offline

Real life is cool.What's nice about this thread is you can actually do most of it.

Like one day my buddy was over and as we partook of our favorite aparatif, his gaze came across a mop that was sitting in the corner in my carpeted livingroom and he asked "What is the mop doing there ?". I couldn't resist, I replied "I don't know what you're hallucinating but it ain't doing shit".

To me real life humor is the best. After a while at my new job I knew we were a bunch of pottymouths. Jokingly one guy says "Now don't be cussing and swearing around here", I told him "No fucking problem".

T

(in reply to LTRsubNW)

Profile

Post #: 4