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PerhapsitsFate -> Posts big "NO WHINING ZONE" sign (2/10/2005 9:05:26 AM)
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I haven't been posting very much lately, but I think that something really should be addressed. I read the "Rude Submissives" thread, and all the other whining that takes place about so-called "rude submissives". I was a waitress for many years prior to finding my career path, and there is one basic premise in customer service...
"Some people are just jerks (we usually usually used a more colorful name, but i'm being nice). They don't tip, you can't make them happy... accept it and get on with your life!!"
I love reading profiles, and I spend way too much time every day doing that. I find others views fascinating, and admittably entertaining. It seems every other profile who has a journal entry is one "whining" about how people don't return emails. I get entranced, open the full profile and read on, and it's usually post after post. Generally I will just click off and move on, but it's really time someone pointed out that "whining" is not an attractive quality in anyone, especially a Dominant.
During a recent exchange with one such Dominant, I honestly felt like I was slamming my head against a wall. I'm going to make a few points, hopefully someone will agree that they are valid, and that just maybe I have a point...
1. Just because someone says they are submissive/Dominant in a personal ad, does not make that true. Anyone that has met people from the net real time, know this to be fact.
2. Just because our lifestyle is supposed to be one of respect, honesty and loyalty, does not mean that everyone upholds these values as much as you might.
3. Just because you send an email, that does not mean it merits a reply.
~ Maybe it's obvious to them that you only saw their picture and sent an email.How many times do I get emails from married men, poly houses, etc. Many of us take the time to fill out our profiles fairly extensively and specifically, why should I be required to waste my time replying to you, if you didn't even read my profile to know that we aren't suited? Maybe that would save alot of wasted time for everyone?
4. PERHAPS, just PERHAPS, this person popped into CM, read their email and had to dash off for one reason on another. I often do this if I get busy at work or home. Sometimes its been as much as days or a week or so before I can reply to an email... that doesn't make me rude, it shows I have a life. Not everyone (thankfully) has nothing else to do all day, but sit and wait with baited breath for emails from prospective partners.
But, if a fairly prompt reply isn't sent, I've received nasty emails, calling me a variety of names and questioning my sincerity, even if I had planned to write to them.
5. Some people really have trouble with rejecting anyone, maybe they are intimidated enough to figure it's better to leave well enough alone? If you polled the submissives on this board and asked them if they had even been cussed out for saying "no thank you, not interested", I bet every one of them would answer to the positive. Maybe they are a bit gunshy.
6. Maybe they aren't getting your emails? Woo hoo wonders of wonders, something electronic mess up???? NO WAY NEVER.
7. This is a personals site, not real life. "Cyber" subs/Doms could care less if you are going to spread rumors about them. Most of the whining that is involved is about unreturned emails, blocking and rejections. If you are who you say you are, then say f*ck it and move on, their loss! Stewing about people in the cyber world is silly, for they are always going to be here. We all know this.
8. Last point. Do you reply to every piece of mail you get?? Snail or email? Do you write to "Hot Kristy Opens Wide" or "Enhance your Penis"? Do you write thank you notes to Walmart or Office Depot for bringing their sales to your attention? Heck, do you even reply to every single Christmas, Birthday or Holiday card??
I guess I could go on and on about this, but I'm not. This is a lifestyle that preaches honor, respect, and loyalty... not bitching, whining and moaning. All of this has caused me to reflect on my own profile and journal entries, and I've made the decision that no more whining here, as it's very unattractive. This is a personals site, to attract others mostly, be it for a relationship, friendship or play. Dangling an old smelly sock on a fishing line over a lake probably won't catch you any fish, and being a big crybaby if you are claiming to be a Dominant won't attract the kind of submissive you are probably interested in. Personally I do desire a relationship with a Dominant eventually, I do want him to have a heart and be passionate and loving, about things that matter, but stewing about lack of response to emails is moot and frankly, just plain silly. It's a turn off for me, and I can't imagine that it isn't for others as well.
Now that I've got everyone all riled up, I'll step behind my asbestos shield and hit "OK", damning myself for all eternity!!
*big cheesy grin and curtsey*
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