How to deal with the unmet need?

How to deal with the unmet need? (Full Version)

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findmedaddy -> How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 3:23:16 PM)
I have asked this in a few places over the years, probably because there are times (fortunately not too frequent) when I just need a shoulder to cry on. I vegged out all day on the 'net, reading posts by people who have found what I want, and it has torn a hole in my heart. "Jealousy" doesn't really cover this feeling. It's more like I want to go somewhere and just scream "DADDY!" and pray that he'll just show UP already. Those of you who are looking -- what do you do to patch the hole for a little while longer?

MmakeMme -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 4:08:39 PM)
Stop looking. A principal task of Zen Buddhism is to realize that each experience is a wonderful as the next, each action as well-planned (not by you) as another. Feel where you are now, be grateful for where you are now, and although it doesn't bring you what you are looking for, perhaps you could adjust your sights. See my sig, please.

findmedaddy -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 4:10:04 PM)
Yes...I'm sure this is right. Thank you.

KatyLied -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 4:14:16 PM)
Find things to occupy your time and your life.

Kalira -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 4:23:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: findmedaddy I have asked this in a few places over the years, probably because there are times (fortunately not too frequent) when I just need a shoulder to cry on. I vegged out all day on the 'net, reading posts by people who have found what I want, and it has torn a hole in my heart. "Jealousy" doesn't really cover this feeling. It's more like I want to go somewhere and just scream "DADDY!" and pray that he'll just show UP already. Those of you who are looking -- what do you do to patch the hole for a little while longer? As already stated. Stop looking. Find other ways to fulfill that need until it can filled with what you desire the most.

SamKeithsslave -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 4:36:47 PM)
I agree with MmakeMme - dont look. I'm not sure I neccessarily go along with the Zen theory thing, I am more inclined to think that someone up there is playing with us - lets not give him/her the satisfaction [:D] I have always tended to throw myself into my writing and other aspects of my life when I have felt a little less than whole. Thats not to say laundry and writing become a patch, they just become a distraction. Try not to think of your life as having a hole in it that needs filling, instead look at your life as being complete and full, but just missing an "extra" component - ie a Master. I've been where you are and truly empathize, nothing I say will probably help at all, but hopefully it might give a different perspective on things?

Quivver -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 5:01:35 PM)
Swear off of wanting a Daddy, Convince yourself that your too weird to ever find one anyways and get comfortable with what you know you are. If you dont know what or who you are, go find it again. Do chit you've wanted to do, go learn something. Eventually you'll forget you were lonely and wonder why the hell you were even looking, when poof, there on your door step will be Daddy!

findmedaddy -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 5:36:44 PM)
Thanks everyone. Sorry I boo-hooed, and I appreciate your responses.

Kalira -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 5:38:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: findmedaddy Thanks everyone. Sorry I boo-hooed, and I appreciate your responses. thats ok. Everyone is entitled to a boo-hoo session once in awhile [8D]

findmedaddy -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 6:35:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Kalira quote: ORIGINAL: findmedaddy Thanks everyone. Sorry I boo-hooed, and I appreciate your responses. thats ok. Everyone is entitled to a boo-hoo session once in awhile [8D] Kind of pointless, though....Thanks for understanding

angaothsi -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 6:49:54 PM)
It isn't excatly pointless to have a bit of a "boo-hoo" every now and again, after all, it is just expressing your emotions before they consume you. I agree with everyone else, stop looking, focus on yourself, throw yourself into something productive that you enjoy, that enriches you and who you are. Take some classes, run a marathon, work for the homeless, get invloved in changing unfair or useless laws, those are just some excamples, find something that speaks to YOU. This way you will be making yourself happy and better (not that you arent wonderful as you currently are, but as humans we can always improve) than when your Daddy finds you he will have more to find pleaseing about you. ~Blessings~

KatyLied -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 6:58:40 PM)
Um, yeah, Quivver whatever. You forgot to mention "take up mud wrestling".

TemptingNviceSub -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 7:20:23 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: findmedaddy quote: ORIGINAL: Kalira quote: ORIGINAL: findmedaddy Thanks everyone. Sorry I boo-hooed, and I appreciate your responses. thats ok. Everyone is entitled to a boo-hoo session once in awhile [8D] Kind of pointless, though....Thanks for understanding Actually not pointless if it achieved a desired effect..such as having you realize you are not alone..or...that you may actually feel a teeny bit better...[:)]..buck up little buckeroo!...Tempting

IvyP -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 11:41:44 PM)
just deal..........good things come to those who wait :)

slavemaia -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/25/2006 11:42:18 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: findmedaddy I have asked this in a few places over the years, probably because there are times (fortunately not too frequent) when I just need a shoulder to cry on. I vegged out all day on the 'net, reading posts by people who have found what I want, and it has torn a hole in my heart. "Jealousy" doesn't really cover this feeling. It's more like I want to go somewhere and just scream "DADDY!" and pray that he'll just show UP already. Those of you who are looking -- what do you do to patch the hole for a little while longer? i know it's not easy waiting for your one. But no sense sitting around bemoaning the fact. That's going to do exactly the opposite of what you want - make you less attractive. Why not take a deeper interest in your own life, talents, skills etc. Then when He comes along, you'll have this whole, beautiful person to bring to Him, instead of an aching need. Just a thought.

sublizzie -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/26/2006 12:08:35 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: findmedaddy Those of you who are looking -- what do you do to patch the hole for a little while longer? Today I started researching what it would take to join a nunnery. I figure if I can't find a Dom I might as well figure out a way to be a submissive to my Ultimate Dom and being a nun seemed like a good idea at the time. Now, however, I'm rethinking that. Not sure they'd want someone like me in a nunnery.

MmakeMme -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/26/2006 6:12:19 AM)
I had the same sort of idea, lizzie, although I was considering joining a cattery.

SexyRed -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/26/2006 6:23:50 AM)
Despite the advice of many, there is nothing you can do that will satisfy the ache and desire you have regarding a relationship. I don't care how accomplished, busy, talented or fabulous you make yourself, it only makes it worse to be without someone who makes your heart sing.

Aine -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/26/2006 7:44:17 AM)
I don't think anyone here was saying "find other things to satisfy", rather keeping busy, doing things, getting stuff done rather than sitting around feeling sorry for herself. I know not everyone feels the same way, but I have tested the theory a few times myself and indeed, every time I stopped looking for love, it fell into my lap. I had gotten out of the house, cleaned myself up, went about my life and tried to have a good time and enjoy a bit of time to myself. I am a firm believer that because I had bucked up, got over myself and started enjoying life for what it was rather than what it could be, love fell into my farkin lap. Twice. People around us notice the differences between someone who is enjoying life and someone who is just going through the motions. I believe that a lot of the time, -that- is the difference that makes someone approach us, whether they be a new friend or a new love.

zbabe888 -> RE: How to deal with the unmet need? (11/27/2006 2:11:44 PM)
I'd like to add too that there is no way that everyone that you think found what you wanted. People tells things the way they want them heard and as we ALL know - on-line is not reality. So change your focus, stop looking and all of the other wonderful advice here - but KNOW that you aren't missing out on some perfect world.

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