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Collars and collaring - 2/14/2005 6:57:38 AM   
Sirssweet


Posts: 26
Joined: 1/31/2005
Status: offline 		Exactly what does a collar signify? And what is the emotional differences between a training collar and a collar that is worn on other occassions? I have recently entered a relationship with a Dom and we were discussing collars. He would like me to have my own collar in training sessions but I am certain he does not want to make an ever-lasting committment at this time. I understand and agree with that. But agreeing to wear any kind of collar is some sort of committement, at least to the experience and the moment, I think. And opinions out there?

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RE: Collars and collaring - 2/14/2005 7:11:38 AM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline
quote:

Exactly what does a collar signify? And what is the emotional differences between a training collar and a collar that is worn on other occassions?


Sirsweet,
Collars mean different things to different people. For me I consider my collar much in the same way one would consider a wedding ring. I have never personally worn a "training collar". I think the concept of them is rather new, so it would be best to get the opinion of someone more experienced with them.

A collar though to me does indicate there is a commitment on some level. I could not help but notice that you have just had your first experience with this man only within the last week. Maybe I am old fashioned but to me that seems a bit soon to be discussing collars as I would need much more time to determine if that person would be someone I wished to commit to on any level.

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to Sirssweet)
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RE: Collars and collaring - 2/14/2005 7:54:30 AM   
msndom


Posts: 5
Joined: 1/15/2005
Status: offline 		For me, I consider a collar to be as sacred as a wedding ring.

I won't even use a collar during play because of its significance. If my sub insists on using a collar (for leash training, or more often to have the feeling of being "owned" during our time togehter), I make her provide her own collar. I'll put it on when I arrive and remove it when I leave, but in the end, since the collar is hers, she belongs to herself.

Should the relationship progress to a higher point, then it will come a time when I will bring the collar and she will know how seriously I take that.

(in reply to mistoferin)
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RE: Collars and collaring - 2/14/2005 8:01:03 AM   
suberic


Posts: 175
Joined: 1/9/2005
From: Nashville TN
Status: offline 		Well, according to some of the articles I have been seeing on the Internet, there are really three collars:

A collar of consideration
A training collar
a slave collar

A consideration collar is like a pre-engagment ring, where there is a commitment, but it can be broken by either party without problems. Generally it's light blue and is something that should signify to others in the community that this person is off limits, mostly because the time period and relationship is so new that anything can break it.

The training collar is like the engagement ring. IT signifys a commitment that is deeper and more willing to explore things. With this one you are saying that it is acceptiable to you that the top start pushing boundaries and showing more of what they want in a relationship.

The Slave collar is the wedding ring. This should signify that the relationship is ready to take on everything from inside and outside, and should stand up to it.

There are a lot more to this, but I'm not the one to ask. Check out http://www.steel-door.com (and I could very easily be wrong on that URL, I'm at work and they have it screened.) Do a Google search for "Steel Fancy Consideration Collar" and you should get the right site.

(in reply to Sirssweet)
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RE: Collars and collaring - 2/14/2005 8:09:20 AM   
mistoferin


Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline 		Lol....you forgot Protection Collars, Online Collars, Velcro Collars, House Collars which unaccompanied subs are to be considered under at various events. Gosh it sure was a lot simpler when you were either collared or you weren't!!!

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to suberic)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Collars and collaring - 2/14/2005 9:06:29 AM   
BeachMystress


Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline 		Collar Caution
http://www.frugaldomme.com/etiquette/dometiq7.htm

Collaring
http://www.soulshaven.f2s.com/sub_collars.php3

Collaring Cermony
http://www.castlerealm.com/library/collar.shtml

Collars
http://cuffs.com/submission/collar2.html

Collars
http://www.explore-sex.com/sex_and_romance/C/Collar_(BDSM).html

Collars Explained
http://www.erotic-bdsm.net/Articles/The_Collar.html

Collars and Traditions
http://www.castlerealm.com/library/morecollars.shtml

The Collar of Consideration
http://www.steel-door.com/Consideration_Collar.html

The Formal Collar
http://www.steel-door.com/Formal_Collar.html

The Training Collar
http://www.steel-door.com/Training_Collar.html

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to Sirssweet)
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RE: Collars and collaring - 2/14/2005 10:16:55 AM   
proudsub


Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline 		Here are a few of the previous threads on collars:

collar conundrm

collars-when

collars

what is a collar

collaring a submissive

a question about collars

what is your definition of a training collar

< Message edited by proudsub -- 2/14/2005 10:17:42 AM >

_____________________________

proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

"You are entitled to your own opinions but not your own facts"--Alan Greenspan


(in reply to Sirssweet)
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RE: Collars and collaring - 2/14/2005 11:33:43 AM   
Sirssweet


Posts: 26
Joined: 1/31/2005
Status: offline 		Once again, yall have come to the rescue with lots of food for thought. Thank you so much for the input!

Sirs sweet

(in reply to Sirssweet)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Collars and collaring - 2/14/2005 12:42:52 PM   
sub4hire


Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		I have no clue what the world believes but I believe there is one single collar. The one my dom gives me that is more significant than a wedding ring.
Never to be removed. To be taken very seriously.

(in reply to Sirssweet)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Collars and collaring - 2/15/2005 5:21:15 AM   
cailinTC


Posts: 18
Joined: 2/6/2005
Status: offline 		sweet,

A collar to cailin means more to her than a wedding ring. These days, a wedding ring doesn't mean much and sometimes marriages come and go. (ok in a lot of cases so do collars) cailin has been married and divorced once. So the collar signifies "eternal" or as long as Master will have cailin. There are many different kinds of collars. The training collar to cailin is not a permanent one. Just so you know, sweet, cailin is owned real time by a Gorean and she lives as His slave. There are also consideration collars, which in cailin's eyes are just another form of a "promise ring" or something of that sort. cailin does wear a collar, however, it is not steel, yet. Once that steel collar wraps around her neck, she considers herself owned for life. Alot of Ppeople don't agree, but as erin said earlier, it is how you perceive it. These are just the opinions of a girl. Good luck in your journey, sister.

~His cailin

(in reply to Sirssweet)
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RE: Collars and collaring - 2/15/2005 5:30:38 AM   
TolerableCruelty


Posts: 447
Joined: 2/4/2005
Status: offline
quote:

Lol....you forgot Protection Collars, Online Collars, Velcro Collars


LMAO erin, I always thought those were the same things..... (all velcro)

*snickers*

-Trav-

(in reply to cailinTC)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Collars and collaring - 2/15/2005 5:42:03 AM   
Wolfspet


Posts: 143
Joined: 1/11/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mistoferin

Lol....you forgot Protection Collars, Online Collars, Velcro Collars, House Collars which unaccompanied subs are to be considered under at various events. Gosh it sure was a lot simpler when you were either collared or you weren't!!!

BWHAHAHAHAHA
Ain't it the truth.
Some days I rue the internet...

(in reply to mistoferin)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Collars and collaring - 2/15/2005 8:32:58 AM   
aliljaded1


Posts: 121
Joined: 6/20/2004
Status: offline 		a collar to me signifies ownershipand loyalty. ive received 1 in my life . i wore it proudly .

_____________________________

**The mind is its own place,and in itself can make a heaven of hell, and a hell of heaven**


(in reply to Sirssweet)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Collars and collaring - 2/16/2005 8:02:00 AM   
shaohua


Posts: 21
Joined: 12/9/2004
Status: offline 		a training collar signifies that a sort of comitment has been reached and this Person is training you to be what They want you to be.

it can be used as a way to get a submissive or slave to get used to wearing a collar, as a perminant collar is usually worn 24/7.

but for the most part a collar is seen as a sign of ownership and comitment.

(in reply to Sirssweet)
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RE: Collars and collaring - 2/16/2005 8:26:58 PM   
pandoravampire


Posts: 374
Joined: 12/6/2004
Status: offline 		a collar is a ticket to another place, as i found out recently. And thats just a play collar. The metaphoric overtones, mixed with breath play, the sound it makes (choke chain) when the leash is pulled tight. It unbloodybelievable! get one now!

(in reply to shaohua)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Collars and collaring - 2/17/2005 11:18:32 AM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Sirssweet

Exactly what does a collar signify?

The collar I have doesn't really signify anything except that I am with the Owner at that time and I'm his property. He only has me wear it when we are physically together, but I'm always his property so it's not really something in itself that holds much to me.

quote:

And what is the emotional differences between a training collar and a collar that is worn on other occassions?


Depends on the relationship. Mostly training collar is specifically for training, no real commitment beyond whatever task or goal you are working towards.

[quoteBut agreeing to wear any kind of collar is some sort of committement, at least to the experience and the moment, I think. And opinions out there?


A collar is a symbol. As such it can and does mean any darn thing you want it to mean. Some relationships have no collars at all. Some have 3. Some have one they wear at work and one they wear at home. The physical collar is pointless without the understanding and agreement behind it. And you only know what that is by discussing it with the other person specifically.

(in reply to Sirssweet)
Profile   Post #: 16
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