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Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 12:16:59 AM

tetherboy

Posts: 38
Joined: 11/19/2004
Status: offline

This might be a little bit of an odd approach, but I thought I would try it and see what happens.

I really would like to speak with a lifestyle Dominant who has a very firm grasp on what the lifestyle is and what it all means. I have some very personal questions that I'm struggling with and while I am sure there is help available here, I'd prefer to not put myself out so openly by discussing it within this forum.

I am looking for someone who is very knowledgable and doesn't mind helping other people. Due to the uncertainy of this medium, I'd most appreciate someone referring another, rather than picking up the ball and running with it themselves.

Gah! I hope all of this makes sense. I just need to talk with someone that isn't going to steer me down the wrong path.

Thank you so much!

Post #: 1

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 12:36:09 AM

Lorelei115

Posts: 1933
Joined: 8/16/2006
From: Sin City
Status: offline

Lessee.. I would reccomend LuckyAlbatross, MistressFireMa'am, MisPandora, Lashra, DiurnalVampire, MstrssPassion... really pretty much anyone on these boards is willing to help if you have questions and they all have wisdom in their own ways.

_____________________________

A sucessful life is not measured by what we do
But by the realization
Of who we are.

(in reply to tetherboy)

Post #: 2

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 12:54:34 AM

BitaTruble

Posts: 9779
Joined: 1/12/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

I can't recommend someone to you because I don't know if they are willing to help you in a private context, but I would like to suggest that you speak to at least a few people so you get some diversity of opinions then you can see where those who are knowledgeable diverge and where they intersect and get a more well rounded view of things.

Best of luck to you, tetherboy.

Celeste

_____________________________

"Oh, so it's just like
Rock, paper, scissors."

He laughed. "You are the wisest woman I know."

(in reply to Lorelei115)

Post #: 3

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 1:07:01 AM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

I only wanted to say that I think the black bar to conceal your dog's identity is hilarious!!!

Welcome to CM and best of luck to you.

(in reply to tetherboy)

Post #: 4

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 2:32:36 AM

tetherboy

Posts: 38
Joined: 11/19/2004
Status: offline

Lorelei,

Thank you for the reply. I'll contact the ladies you suggested. I appreciate it a great deal.

< Message edited by tetherboy -- 11/30/2006 2:38:42 AM >

(in reply to Lorelei115)

Post #: 5

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 4:42:49 AM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lorelei115

Lessee.. I would reccomend LuckyAlbatross, MistressFireMa'am, MisPandora, Lashra, DiurnalVampire, MstrssPassion... really pretty much anyone on these boards is willing to help if you have questions and they all have wisdom in their own ways.

Thanks for your confidence, but I'm *not* the person to come to for advice. If I care to engage someone in their personal problems here on the board voluntarily, that's MY choice. I would ask that folks NOT write me on the other side asking for help as this poor fellow did today.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to Lorelei115)

Post #: 6

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 5:22:58 AM

MstrssPassion

Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline

I don't have any problem with being contacted on the other side & I did reply to the note you sent. Unfortunately, I really couldn't figure out what it was you were asking. In fact it seems that you were asking many things but you didn't provide enough info about each question in order to form a reply.

_____________________________

MstrssPassion

(in reply to tetherboy)

Post #: 7

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 7:28:42 AM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Lorelei115

Lessee.. I would reccomend LuckyAlbatross, MistressFireMa'am, MisPandora, Lashra, DiurnalVampire, MstrssPassion... really pretty much anyone on these boards is willing to help if you have questions and they all have wisdom in their own ways.

I might be making an egotistical assumption...but...MasterFireMaam, not Mistress. The mistake is easy to make...no worries.

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to Lorelei115)

Post #: 8

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 9:00:19 AM

Lorelei115

Posts: 1933
Joined: 8/16/2006
From: Sin City
Status: offline

Gawd, it was very late at night... here's the lesson, don't sleepwalk and type!

I do know that MasterFireMaam... I really don't know where my head was at.

MisPandora, I apologize for offering up your name without asking, sorry if any offence was given.

Now that I think about it I probably shouldn't have offered up anyones names without seeking their consent. *bows humbly* Again, my apologies.

< Message edited by Lorelei115 -- 11/30/2006 9:04:50 AM >

_____________________________

A sucessful life is not measured by what we do
But by the realization
Of who we are.

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)

Post #: 9

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 10:56:59 AM

pixelslave

Posts: 1444
Joined: 8/19/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: tetherboy

This might be a little bit of an odd approach, but I thought I would try it and see what happens.

I really would like to speak with a lifestyle Dominant who has a very firm grasp on what the lifestyle is and what it all means. I have some very personal questions that I'm struggling with and while I am sure there is help available here, I'd prefer to not put myself out so openly by discussing it within this forum.

I am looking for someone who is very knowledgable and doesn't mind helping other people. Due to the uncertainy of this medium, I'd most appreciate someone referring another, rather than picking up the ball and running with it themselves.

Gah! I hope all of this makes sense. I just need to talk with someone that isn't going to steer me down the wrong path.

Thank you so much!

tetherboy,
I don't think you realize it, but you've very indirectly asked for the help you seek, which may in fact be part of the problem you are having. I strongly suggest that if there is a Domme who participates on this forum with whom you seem to identify, you approach her respectfully and inquire if you can seek her advice.

As an added note, others may in fact have the same issues that concern you and would benefit from your asking any of your questions in public that you at all felt comfortable with. Often, when one person has a question, you can bet that many others who read these message boards, have the same question in their minds as well, but also fear posting them for the very same reasons as you.

Best of luck to you in your search for the answers you seek.

- pixel

_____________________________

Chivalry isn't dead! It's for those who have it in their hearts & are willing to be taught. It's a way of life, a code of honor; this one's armor still needs some polishing!

(in reply to tetherboy)

Post #: 10

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 11:54:07 AM

LordVelvet

Posts: 311
Joined: 4/25/2006
Status: offline

tetherboy,
I don't know if it is a Dom or Domme. I don't pretend to have all of the answers or even the questions but you can contact ME if you chose.

(in reply to pixelslave)

Post #: 11

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 12:42:17 PM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear tetherboy, Ladies and Gentlemen;

I don't mind helping individuals here on the forum, in note form/E-mail and or face to face.

My advice though, is to put your questions down on paper and then write it out and go over it in review, as to see if it makes sense or not to you first before putting it to another for review.

My personal experiences have been, that every single soul living has a journey that they must walk alone at times. And, to put to words what one feels is often difficult and or impossible, as words fail to fully express what your spirit, mind and soul aches to speak out and question others about. Just do the best you can. Communications is extremely important.

In addition, even though you do not find the answers you seek; you may have been enlightened on how to look in things differently. People will see the very same item in so many different ways...and, they are all correct at times.

Hope this helps you on the journey lad.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to tetherboy)

Post #: 12

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 12:50:27 PM

Morrigel

Posts: 492
Joined: 10/13/2006
Status: offline

I have a lot of conversational email contact over on the other side, but most of the questions people ask are not of the self-help variety. Nevertheless, I am not against anyone contacting me, if they choose to. So long as they are polite, I will always try to answer politely, even if the honest answer is, "I don't know" or "I can't say".

--M

(in reply to LadyHugs)

Post #: 13

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 2:06:19 PM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

Sadly, the question he's posing would really benefit others being asked publically. It's something that I find not all that unique, and I'd be willing to bet there are folks here going through the same thing.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to Morrigel)

Post #: 14

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 3:15:37 PM

tetherboy

Posts: 38
Joined: 11/19/2004
Status: offline

I appreciate the responses from everyone. You have been very supportive. Before I approached solving this matter in this way, I combed the forums looking for others who might have posted along the same lines and it was because I didn't find any that I decided to go the more covert route. I do not wish to be trying to figure these things out in a public setting at this time. I will, however, be more than happy to share with others once I feel I'm in a place to do so. I keep waiting for someone to write the how-to book, and perhaps it will be me. :)

(in reply to MisPandora)

Post #: 15

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 3:23:37 PM

MstrssPassion

Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
Status: offline

if this was easy... everyone would be trying to figure out how to be something else

there are no easy 1,2,3 answers

I little tid-bit of wisdom passed down by my Father years ago:

Anything worth having in life is worth working for because those things that come easy to us are often unappreciated.

_____________________________

MstrssPassion

(in reply to tetherboy)

Post #: 16

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 5:56:06 PM

sophia37

Posts: 1433
Joined: 2/7/2006
Status: offline

I see we've got our newest member, a yellow lab who refuses to reveal himself. Its cool he got his sub tetherboy to write his questions for him. Im impressed. Cant wait to hear more.

Unfortunately I told my irish water spaniel about it all. So now Im sposed to ask questions to tetherboy about whats the best way to Dom the cat? I told my dog Cassidy, the first step was to stop chasing him, but who listens to me?

(in reply to MstrssPassion)

Post #: 17

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 6:03:50 PM

gooddogbenji

Posts: 5094
Joined: 11/15/2005
From: Toronto
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: tetherboy

I appreciate the responses from everyone. You have been very supportive. Before I approached solving this matter in this way, I combed the forums looking for others who might have posted along the same lines and it was because I didn't find any that I decided to go the more covert route. I do not wish to be trying to figure these things out in a public setting at this time. I will, however, be more than happy to share with others once I feel I'm in a place to do so. I keep waiting for someone to write the how-to book, and perhaps it will be me. :)

Why not just create a sham profile, ask the questions, then read the answers?

We get tons of one time posters, so no one would think it weird, and the sham might even get some "Hey, good question, but your profile needs work," comments.

Yours,

benji

Edited because my proofreading was on par with an illiterate dyslexic's during an orgasm.

< Message edited by gooddogbenji -- 11/30/2006 6:19:00 PM >

_____________________________

Prevent global warming. Stop burning patchouli.

(in reply to tetherboy)

Post #: 18

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 11/30/2006 6:58:19 PM

yourMissTress

Posts: 1665
Joined: 6/14/2005
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

I promise that if you ask the question in the open forums that I will neither make fun of you or think less of you. I can only speak for myself.

If MisPandora thinks that others would benefit from the discussion that would follow your question, then please ask it. If you were unable to find any other discussion based on the same idea, then you might be helping someone else by asking it.

_____________________________

Tress

"If you have to tell people that you are a lady, you are not." My Grandmother

(in reply to tetherboy)

Post #: 19

RE: Looking for a Wise Referral for Questions - 12/1/2006 4:02:28 AM

MisPandora

Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: tetherboy

I appreciate the responses from everyone. You have been very supportive. Before I approached solving this matter in this way, I combed the forums looking for others who might have posted along the same lines and it was because I didn't find any that I decided to go the more covert route. I do not wish to be trying to figure these things out in a public setting at this time. I will, however, be more than happy to share with others once I feel I'm in a place to do so. I keep waiting for someone to write the how-to book, and perhaps it will be me. :)

You have it together more than you give yourself credit for. Write the book.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to tetherboy)

Post #: 20

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