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Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 9:50:38 AM

TreSwank

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A couple days ago, whilst sitting by my lonesome, and enjoying the mundane scenery of my workplace's employee cafeteria, I was hit by a sensual revelation - the kind that I could only liken unto a burning bush, or some highly-anticipated comet that comes once every generation. I mean, it was pretty goddam intense.

I reached out to grasp my napkin, but instead, felt the cold, frothy meringue, on top of my slice of lemon pie. Now, I didn't put enough pressure on the meringue to actually break through the surface........it was more like the ginger way you might pat a kid on the head after a kickass Little League perfomance.

The meringue felt like a cold tit, and I got a little bit excited. "Holy SHIT" I said to myself - this feels kinda nice. When I patted the meringue again, I had already formed the rock-solid opinion that Sara Lee would become my new Penthouse. I mean, if you would have felt the texture of this meringue, you might very well have shot a load of hot, thick jism into your Fruit-of-the-Loom's. I seriously thought about inviting everyone over to my table, just to touch this meringue.

That night, I locked myself in the bathroom for five hours, and couldn't stop fantasizing about the meringue's, beaten egg-white and sugar awesomeness.

Now, is this something you guys have also experienced? Feel free to share.

< Message edited by TreSwank -- 12/20/2006 10:40:40 AM >

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RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 9:54:20 AM

MmakeMme

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Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NC
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~momentary look of disbelief~

~hysterical~

Move your ass back down to NC, Tre. You and I have some drinking to do. (And some karaoke to sing.)

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Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. ~~ Dalai Lama

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RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 9:57:06 AM

MmakeMme

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I did have an erotic meltdown last week when I picked up a Magic Rub eraser. Gawd, that soft spongy rubber between my fingers was almost unbearable.

_____________________________

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. ~~ Dalai Lama

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RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 9:58:03 AM

TreSwank

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MmakeMme

I did have an erotic meltdown last week when I picked up a Magic Rub eraser. Gawd, that soft spongy rubber between my fingers was almost unbearable.

Gradually lowering a string of beads into your hand is pretty awesome as well. Some folks also like it when you pull em' out of the ol' rectum.

< Message edited by TreSwank -- 12/20/2006 10:02:52 AM >

(in reply to MmakeMme)

Post #: 4

RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 10:11:15 AM

pahunkboy

Posts: 33061
Joined: 2/26/2006
From: Central Pennsylvania
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the good news is that is IS normal.

bad news is there can never be enuff "burning bushes". ;-0

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RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 10:22:33 AM

Aileen68

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TreSwank
Some folks also like it when you pull em' out of the ol' rectum.

Oooooh...if you keep this up you'll make my favorites list.

(in reply to TreSwank)

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RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 10:24:20 AM

poplolly

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Joined: 10/7/2006
From: Edmonton
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Define "normal"!

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~~ Marilyn Monroe.

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RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 10:30:03 AM

TreSwank

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quote:

ORIGINAL: poplolly

Define "normal"!

I'd like to dedicate this song to that meringue. I think that it hits the nail on the head in regards to my feelings for that delicious confection.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=Oa0t8J11ypk

< Message edited by TreSwank -- 12/20/2006 10:38:04 AM >

(in reply to poplolly)

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RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 10:57:19 AM

Petruchio

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(laughing) You're insane but lovable (by girls at least).

You're also normal and unlovable too.

Whenever I take one of the large vitamin E gel capsules, it reminds me of a hardened nipple. I actually compress it between my lips for a moment before ingesting it.

(in reply to TreSwank)

Post #: 9

RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 11:02:21 AM

TreSwank

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Petruchio

(laughing) You're insane but lovable (by girls at least).

You're also normal and unlovable too.

Whenever I take one of the large vitamin E gel capsules, it reminds me of a hardened nipple. I actually compress it between my lips for a moment before ingesting it.

Oh man.......that's really sick. (Just kidding.)

(in reply to Petruchio)

Post #: 10

RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 11:12:18 AM

thompsonx

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TreSwank

quote:

ORIGINAL: MmakeMme

I did have an erotic meltdown last week when I picked up a Magic Rub eraser. Gawd, that soft spongy rubber between my fingers was almost unbearable.

Gradually lowering a string of beads into your hand is pretty awesome as well. Some folks also like it when you pull em' out of the ol' rectum.

TreSwank:
Sounds to me like you have been to Japan at least once.

thompson

(in reply to TreSwank)

Post #: 11

RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 2:35:45 PM

cuddleheart50

Posts: 9718
Joined: 2/20/2006
From: Kentucky
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You are just wayyyyyyyyy to funny!!!

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RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 2:42:32 PM

MmakeMme

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quote:

ORIGINAL: TreSwank

Gradually lowering a string of beads into your hand is pretty awesome as well. Some folks also like it when you pull em' out of the ol' rectum.

Whose?

_____________________________

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. ~~ Dalai Lama

(in reply to TreSwank)

Post #: 13

RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 2:44:28 PM

MmakeMme

Posts: 682
Joined: 7/29/2006
From: NC
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Petruchio

Whenever I take one of the large vitamin E gel capsules, it reminds me of a hardened nipple. I actually compress it between my lips for a moment before ingesting it.

~swoon~

_____________________________

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions. ~~ Dalai Lama

(in reply to Petruchio)

Post #: 14

RE: Is This Normal? - 12/20/2006 5:46:28 PM

spankmepink11

Posts: 1310
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TreSwank...

For me it's fruit....anything juicy. Watermelon, cantaloupe, honeydew, strawberries, at the perfect stage of ripeness...Close your eyes....open your mouth...bite down softly....slowly.. feel the texture....feel those juices explode on your tongue and lips...mmmmm....

(in reply to MmakeMme)

Post #: 15

RE: Is This Normal? - 12/21/2006 12:32:24 AM

Petruchio

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MmakeMme

~swoon~

(grin) It's nice when someone 'gets' it.

(in reply to MmakeMme)

Post #: 16

RE: Is This Normal? - 12/22/2006 4:33:46 PM

FullCircle

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Joined: 11/24/2005
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We all need a hobby right? Normal is usually defined with a statistical analysis of some chart or shit using those buttons on the calculator that have mould on. If you fit the bell curve then you are normal if you don’t you are either exceptional or defective. The meringue we had at school really put your teeth to the test I always thought they were supposed to be rock hard because of that. It sounds like one of life’s simple pleasures such as sitting in front of a fan heater when you have the flu.

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RE: Is This Normal? - 12/22/2006 6:45:09 PM

dcnovice

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You didn't happen to get the meringue recipe, did you?

(in reply to FullCircle)

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RE: Is This Normal? - 12/22/2006 7:00:26 PM

LaTigresse

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Joined: 1/15/2006
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I knew used to know a guy that liked the feel of warm water balloons.

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My twisted, self deprecating, sense of humour, finds alot to laugh about, in your lack of one!

Just because you are well educated, articulate, and can use big, fancy words, properly........does not mean you are right!

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