my son

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mons -> my son (12/22/2006 3:42:16 AM)
greeting to all my son has change so much from two years he meant this gilr she is a woman but she does not get my respect at all. well it took him two years for me to meet her four days into meeting her i feel a sense of something so bad i told my twin she told me " are you being mean to her" but she would not listne t to me this girl has say thing when my son was not in the room someone suggest to my horror that she is a domme and has my son pussy whipped i hate to use that wrod but it makes me crazy he manner are that of an animal she eats in a way that she make so much moise we hate to be in the rom with her . she would say i want to talk to you mom like she is a woman??? it make no sense she has read mu porfile and made a statement about dommes she use the other word domantrix and laugh. so now i am at the point where she is calling n the phone my phone looking for m son she wll hunt him until she find him. i told my son iwhtout being like i do not like her but i find her so distasteful she is play like she is a dome but she is just a street smart girl and so the end came with she was fighting with my son and she push me i use a cane for a injurie . my son was on her side my maistake was to keep my son here i let her back in,. the last straw was when she called all night on sunday and came at 5 30 am and said my son ask her to let me in my son was saying he need me this was so scary he has a lock on his door so we could not get to him i asked her "why did 'nt you say this before she lied so much and then my sister husband told my don off with a man to man way i left i had to pick up medicinr , when i return he was gone and i have no seen him in for days do you think this is the case is he a submissive to this girl he knows of my life and she is the wrong type if she is one she has made me hate me and made him dislike me i am so worried kids no he is 26 so is she she called me and had the nerve to say : i am looking for him what are you doing" i know she has told my son i curse her or i say this or that . i do not know where he got this giril i never seen anythig like her oh yes in my old place i live where gilr would figth for a man and she does does somehitng i think is so wierd if someone speak to my sone a fanother woman she will look up and grab them by the thorat. she is a stalker everyone i true one i told my son love is not to hurt at all. she was pregant i am not she it was my son but they had all ready planned on an aobrtion but she would come to me and say" oh the baby is moving and madem em think they wanted he did she did not. so she would com and say thing slike the wanted the baby then when i ask her thing she would then tell my son i was bothering her about her being pregant. i wrote here because i needed to know if my son is a sybkissive to her ? he has been no asnwering the phione so she would call me i told her in the beganng not ot ever call at late nigh t or early morning i will wake you in a drean like state and take off my mask i have a capa machine i do not breathe in ny owb when i am sleeply this girl has called and wooke me i have taken my mask off anf i could not breathe at all . oi say this gil is evil i remember letting her stay her he stole all of ny face creans lift the place a mess she thought she was taking over in this house . when my sond birthday came i ask her what he gave him she said in a very sexual want mmeeeeeeeeeeee. i then told her you are never to talke to me in that manner at all she walk out mad she never had a mother her mother was beatne by the father so when lefted the cracked addicted mother told her she will gave her all i the beatening he gave her and he mather was nuts, i was abuse and saw ad had been through hell but she is looking to desrory this faimly my son has left an d thi was becasue my sister husbnad told him offf so bad he has not done rigth to me desrespect in s me in so many ways ii am dominant but not to myy family i am hurt and so confuse with the stufff going on whne he would talk so bad in front of my sister husband and this gilr this gave her the card to do the same i was taguth to respet you mother and anyone esle mother too, i am so truly stress everyone i have sried so much .how do i let him see how she is or do i just sit and now thing of it she has come over right when he nneds to wirth and when he first was getting the job she was oo wake him but not did hr had to go adnd make another appointmant she has what i call a souless person i work with childern of special needs and ever once and awhile you wil meet on i can tell by the lok in there eyes i remember we had no one boy so bute blond with curly hiar and the blue eye i ever seen, well he was one of this chidren he wanted to kill this on little girl he would look for her and would not be able to have anything sharp he was so cute but a mureder at age 6 and this was so real he pust her off an eight foot plaground thing. i caught her just in times. this is my son gilr friend so evil he wants to leave but something is so wrong oh every please gve youin put in this . he is to come tomorrow i mis him but i can not have him making it hard on me i can not blame her all of the way but she has something to do with it i will take any and all help and i will not get made of i am told off . my spelling is so bad i am tired and sleeply thank you all for you helo mons ( my heart is broken this is my son i am a good mother i made ssure he ahad ja

LovingKitten -> RE: my son (12/22/2006 3:46:08 AM)
I, well, I am finding it hard to read your first statement, do you mind if I copy it and edit it a bit so it makes it easier for me and the rest of the users to read?

sublizzie -> RE: my son (12/22/2006 4:33:03 AM)
Mons, I'm sorry for what your son has gotten in to. It sounds more like he's involved with an abusive person than someone who is truly Domme. Frankly, she sounds like my ex-husband. All you can really do is talk to your son about other things until he brings up the subject and then let him say what he has to say. If you can subtlely steer the conversation to the difference between being a submissive, who is encouraged to become more of who they are, and a victim of abuse, who is made into much less than who they could be, that might help. Mostly he needs to know he has your support if he needs to get out of the situation and that you love him regardless of where he's at.

MasterFireMaam -> RE: my son (12/22/2006 11:30:14 AM)
If she's physically injuring people (I read that you needed to use a cane after she pushed you), that would be assault. If she's "hunting" you son down and he doesn't want to see her, that's stalking. I'd seriously consider going to the police about her. Even if he was submissive to her at one time, she's not allowed to do these things if he doesn't want her to. Master Fire

LaTigresse -> RE: my son (12/22/2006 12:28:29 PM)
I second what MasterFire has said. In addition, having a problem with my own grown son right now, I can only say that as a mother to an adult child we cannot "fix" their lives for them anymore. We can be there for them, give them advise when they ask, tell them they are being morons on occasion when they are, but we cannot do it for them. As hard as it is they have to follow their own life paths, learn the lessons they have chosen. Obviously he chose this woman for a reason, there is something he needs to learn from this experience. What that is may be impossible to see right now, perhaps not even in this lifetime. As a parent it is agony to feel so helpless watching your grown child hurt. Unfortunately there are no easy fixes for many of lifes hurdles. Sometimes you just have to step back, let go, and let them learn what the universe is trying to teach them.

kittensangel -> RE: my son (12/23/2006 7:19:39 AM)
I am dealing with much the same thing. My mother wants to keep from the Master adn Mistress i want to serve. She has tried everythign to maintain her control over my life, while she does not understand what is i want, or why. I would sujest setting down wiht him and asking him what is he wants, and why he likes her so much. Please don't find me harsh or anything but i am wondering if your sone sees objections to her as ploy to still control his life and how he lives it.

julietsierra -> RE: my son (12/23/2006 10:04:33 AM)
mons, You're probably not going to like what I say, cause it's going to be so hard for you to do. Don't say another bad word about the woman - not one more word. Not to your friends, your relatives, even your twin. Don't do it. This is why: It could be that your son is in an abusive relationship. (I wouldn't rush into contemplating that he's submissive). Being in that place is a very scary thing - regardless if you are male or female. Nothing feels safe - even your own parents. When you badmouth her, because abusive situations are never something that begins right away, but kind of grows on relationships, he will feel the need to defend her - even if parts of him know this isn't a good idea. The goal for you - as a parent - is to keep your home being someplace safe for him to come to. The comments you need to be making are about how strong he is, what a good head he has on his shoulder, and things along those lines. No one winds up in abusive relationships because they want to. All too often, at the same time they are fearful, they love the person that is hurting them. Think of the abusive person like this gorgeous apple, all red and rosey and sweet on one side, but turn it around and the apple is rotten and decaying. Unless and until he can turn things around, he's going to continue to see the red, rosey and sweet side of things. You can not make him see the entire apple. He has to get there on his own. Chances are, if he's in an abusive relationship, his entire energy is being used to keep things calm and to second guess her moments of abusiveness. He simply can't manage defending her from his own family, and like it or not, because it's safer for him to defend her - he will, and this will cause him to step away from you. Depending on how controlling she is, he just could step away for a long time. So..please - keep things calm for him. Give him that opportunity to see that life doesn't have to be the way it is right now. Be as positive as possible. And keep on doing what you did with him when he was little - build his self esteem, help him be courageous, and make sure he always knows you're available for him and on his side. Remember, he made the choice to be with her, so when you badmouth her, you are telling him he's a fool - in a sideways manner - for choosing her in the first place. Him thinking his mother thinks he's a fool is not what he needs right now. mons, I speak from experience, only it was me who was in the situation your son is possibly in right now. I urge you to stay calm - and if you need further help, you can contact your nearest shelter for more ideas on how to handle the situation you're in. Regardless if the abused person is a man or woman, the shelters will have some suggestions for you as to how family members should and should not handle these things. I wish you well. It's hard to see our little boys turned men having to deal with this. juliet

BBBTBW -> RE: my son (12/23/2006 10:28:13 AM)
There must be something in the water. I too am having issues with my grown child and a possibly abusive counterpart. I have made my stance VERY clear on the situation both with her and him. Now I have to leave it alone and let GOD work it out. Mons, he is grown and like it or not he is going to do what he wants to do regardless of your feelings. Trust that you have raised your son to be a man of good judgement and this is one of those growing trees for him a test of his training. Keep your mouth off of them as Juliet said and don't be anything but ENCOURAGING to your son regarding his personal strengths. The bible says "train up a child in the way they should go and they will not stray far" it doesn't say they won't stray, it says they won't stray far. He will be back with a better sense of what he needs in his life regarding counterparts be they friends or lovers.

imtempting -> RE: my son (12/25/2006 7:29:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mons greeting to all my son has changed so much from two years he met this girl. She is a woman but she does not get my respect at all. Well it took him two years for me to meet her and after four days into meeting her i felt a sense of something so bad that i told my twin sister. She told me " are you being mean to her" but she would not listen to me. When my son was not in the room someone suggest to my horror that she is a domme and has my son pussy whipped i hate to use that word but it makes me crazy. Her manner's are that of an animal, she eats in a way that she make's so much noise we hate to be in the room with her . she would say i want to talk to your mom like she is a woman??? it make no sense she has read my porfile and made a statement about dommes. She use the other word domantrix and laugh. so now i am at the point where she is calling on my phone looking for my son she will hunt him down until she find's him. i told my son withoutt sounding like i do not like her but i find her so distasteful, she acts like she is a domme but she is just a street smart girl. She was fighting with my son and she pushed me, i use a cane for a injurie and my son was on her side. My mistake was to keep my son here, i let her back in.. The last straw was when she called all night on sunday and came at 5 30 am and said my son ask her to let me in. My son was saying he need's my help as this so scary he has a lock on his door so we could not get to him. I asked him "why did 'nt you say this before she lied so much and then my sister husband told my son off with a man to man way. I left to pick up medicaine and when i returned he was gone and i have not seen him for four days. Do you think he is a submissive to this girl?? He knows of my life and she is the wrong type if she is one. She has made me hate me and made him dislike me, i am so worried kids now he is 26 and so is she. She called me and had the nerve to say : i am looking for him what are you doing" i know she has told my son i curse her or i say this or that behind his back. I do not know where he got this girl. I have never seen anything like her, oh yes in my old place i live where this girl would fight for a man and she does somehitng i think is so weird. If someone speak to my son, say a another woman she will look up and grab them by the throat. She is a stalker. Once i told my son love is not to hurt at all. She was pregant aswell, i am not but she said it was my son but they had all ready planned on an aboration. but she would come to me and say" oh the baby is moving and made me think they wanted it. He did not and she did not.So she would come and say things like' they wanted the baby then when i ask her something she would then tell my son i was bothering her about her being pregant. I wrote here because i needed to know if my son is a submissive to her ? he has not been asnwering the phone, so she would call me and i told her in the begaining not to ever call late at night or early in the morning. I will be in a dream like state and take off my mask. I have a capa machine as i do not breath on my own. When i am sleepy, this girl has called and woke me up. i have taken my mask off and i could not breathe at all .I say this girl is evil i remember letting her stay here and she stole all of my face creams and left the place a mess. Sthought she was taking over in this house . When my son's birthday came i ask her what she gave him and she said in a very sexual way.. 'want mmeeeeeeeeeeee'. I then told her you are never to talk to me in that manner at all and she walked out mad she never had a mother her mother was beaten by the father so she was left alone with her mother who was addicted to crack. Her mother told her she will give her all i the beatings her husband gave her and he mother was nuts, i was abused and saw and had been through hell but she is looking to destroy thisfamily. My son has left and this was becasue my sister husband told him offf so bad.He has not done right to me.He has disrespected me in so many ways. I am dominant but not to my family, i am hurt and so confused with the stufff going on. He would talk so bad in front of my sister husband and this girl would do the same. i was taught to respect your mother and anyone else's mother too. I am so truly stressed about this. Everyone i have cried so much How do i let him see how she is or do i just sit here. Now thinking of it she has come over right when he needs to. When he first was getting the job she wastoo wake him but not did not. He had to go and make another appointmant, she is what i call a souless person. I work with children of special need and once in awhile you will meet the following. I remember we had one boy so cute, blond with curly hair and the bluest eye's I have ever seen, well he was one of these chidren who wanted to kill this one little girl. He would look for her and would not be able to have anything sharp. He was so cute but a murder at age 6 and this was so real he pushed her off an eight foot tall play ground thing. I caught her just in time. This is my sons girlfriend. so evil he wants to leave but something is so wrong .oh everybody please give you input on this . he is to come over tomorrow and i miss him but i cannot have him making it hard on me. I cannot blame her all of the way but she has something to do with it. Ii will take any and all help and i will not get mad if I am told off . my spelling is so bad i am tired and sleepy thank you all for you help mons ( my heart is broken this is my son i am a good mother i made sure he had ja (I deleted some lines as I could make no sense out of them. To mons.. Please use parahraphs in future. Most people can get over spelling but it is twice as hard when it is just one massive paragraph) By what I read i dont think your son is a submissive. I've seen his behaviour before but in drug addicts. But she does seem like a stalker type. Saying stuff to him will just send him further away. Chat to some friends of his and see if their of the same opinion.

TexasMaam -> RE: my son (12/25/2006 6:16:18 PM)
mons, Your son will surely be back in touch with you; a mother holds her children's hands for a time, their hearts forever! Do not fear that he will love you any less because of the boundaries you set in your household; he will understand that your anxiousness over this situation is based on your love for him. I am sorry that this woman has affected you in such a negative way. You must try your best to be there for your son, to listen, to console him, to counsel and to guide him. You cannot, however, protect him from his own mistakes. If she is in fact pregnant, time will tell. Only she will know who the baby's father truly is. If she tricks your son with a child that is not his, it is something he will have to learn on his own, no matter how much you may want to intervene. Remember, in your dealings with her, that the child may truly be a grandchild of yours. Never do or say anything to the mother that you would not want your grandbaby to know in years to come. Time will usually sort out an unhappy situation. Your son is a grown man at 26 and he has time enough ahead of him to learn what he wants and what he might not want to put up with in life. If he does, in fact, know of your lifestyle and if he did, in fact, make decisions in his life one way or another because of this knowledge, (as many children of BDSM parents do), he will eventually learn to make his own way through the consequences of his own choices as he matures. Keep loving him, keep comforting him, keep offering him encouragement and positive suggestions. He will eventually make the right choices, choices that will allow him to be happy in his own time and place. Good luck to you, TexasMaam

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