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SusanofO -> RE: Memory verses sub (1/3/2007 11:25:25 AM)
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I had a period in my life for about eight years, when I could not seem to remember much that I read, or sometimes viewed, or that had happened to me for up to a few months before the time period in which I was operating. It was sometimes very difficult to cope with emotionally, but I managed to cope with it practically by finding little tricks to use that worked for me as far as a "short term memory replacement" ; I left Post-It notes everywhere - in my purse, and in various rooms of my residence, reminding myself to do this or that, for instance. Memory loss was pretty discouraging to me, at times (especially, since I am a Mensa member, which I rarely tell anyone, but am saying it now because I want to convery I know this can be pretty difficult. And I think it's always harder if you are smart enough to know just how stupid you may be appearing. Especially if there is not much you can do about it).
I knew I was smarter than my actions sometimes reflected, and in the way I was actually able to react to reading material, or street signs, or signs on highways, for instance. Or - to things I saw on television, or that I read in magazines or newspapers. And things people would say to me. People would tell me something important to themselves, as a friend, for instance - and two weeks later I couldn't remember what they had confided to me, or maybe their birthday, or sometimes even their name. This was usually embarrassing, and sometimes resulted in hurt feelings all around. Sometimes, I let them know why I had memory loss - more often, I did not. The effect was pretty pervasive, and I was terrified it would affect my job performance, so sometimes I just worked twice as hard, which helped.
However, I did meet someone eventually, with whom I felt comfortable opening up with as far as why I had memory loss, and they accepted it completely and didn't make it an issue in our relationship at all. My memory has since improved greatly (that period on my life was all over two decades ago). But - there are still some events, for instance, that other members of my family have very clear memories of - and even though I was with them when the said events took place, I no longer have any memory of them. This can sometimes bother me, but there isn't much to be done about it.
I do understand, I think, what this kind of situation can be like for some people. My solution at the time, as I said, was finding little "coping tricks" that worked (which I found via trial and error), and also being careful to whom I revealed the "why" of my memory loss. These things worked for me - and I did find there really are people out there who do understand. Good luck.
- Susan
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