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ORIGINAL: bandit25

You know, you may not be as socially inept as you think.  Most people find it difficult to meet new people, they just hide it better, that's all.

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ORIGINAL: bandit25

I don't know...you seem pretty together here ;)  Yeah, I know it's the net and all and we're all just words on a screen, but try and imagine a person behind those words.  I think you do just fine when you post.  I'd be delighted to have a conversation with you at a munch.  Hmmmm...don't think that'll happen any time soon as you're across the pond...LOL

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ORIGINAL: sleazy

Trust me, its far easier here with a delete key to hand and a scroll up button to double check what someone just said:)

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ORIGINAL: bandit25
Yeah, I know.  I guess I just wanted to make the point that we are all a bit apprehensive when meeting new people...some more than others, I guess.  I also know that it's easy to give advice and not so easy to take it at times. 

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ORIGINAL: slavegirljoy

i know this is on the "Ask a Master" forum but, i hope you won't mind this slave sharing her perspective with you.

Personally, i don't have any interest in attending munches or play parties or anything else of that nature.  That's just me and i don't feel like i'm missing out on anything.  i have only ever gone to one BDSM event and it was just a little meet & greet with a demo on "medical play" at an apartment in the MD suburbs of DC and, although it was kind of interesting, it just wasn't for me.  The only reason i went was because the Dom i was with at the time wanted to go. 

i don't feel like you have to attend events or be a part of some organized group, if that's not what you enjoy.  None of the Doms i have ever been with went through any kind of training.  They just got themselves a nice little flogger (or had me go get a switch off a tree) and started using it on me.  Seeing my reaction to what they were doing told them that what they were doing was working fine.

Just follow your instinct.  Be yourself and trust yourself.  Be honest with yourself and the person you are interested in and let nature take it's course.  If you feel you need to learn certain techniques to be safe and effective in your activities, there are plenty of  resources available online, all you have to do is type in what interests you and you will get a ton of sites to go to.  Mainly, though, just be yourself and your true nature will reveal itself and before you know it, things will fall into place.  Just like anything else in life, the more you do it, the more comfortable and confident you will become at it.

Best Wishes for a Safe and Happy Journey,
slave joy
Owned property of Master David

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ORIGINAL: DigitalNoise

And I can be dense sometimes - I mean, I'm not entirely sure I would know if someone was flirting with me or not! LMAO

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ORIGINAL: marieToo

Oh....too friggin cute. I can hardly stand it, I want that kitten!!! <sigh>

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.....On a more serious note, I think online actually is a good place to make a first connection and talk until you feel comfortable to take the next step with the girl.  Its a good way to do this gradually if you're the nervous type about it.

Ive never been to munch or a club, so I dont know much about that.  Ive heard both good and bad. 

Personally I have made my connections online and then stepped out to meet when I felt ready.  If it's any consolation, I am also a bit shy in person, but it has not really stopped me from exploring.  I just feel when the time is right and go for it.  I think tho, maybe it's tougher for the dominant party in some ways.  But the good news it that you can work that Dom thing to your advantage and sort of control the pace it moves at.  Just remember you can take it one step at a time.  Don't worry about your first sessioning with a girl right now.  Just concern yourself with making a connection with someone who seems compatible or local or whatever basis there is for your own criteria.  Talk for a while, then go on a 'date' without expectations.  You can dom someone just by ordering her meal for her and things like that---what Im trying to say is that it can be done is small steps.  And as you get more comfortable in your domliness you can bite off bigger pieces.

Good luck to you :)