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Why do you... - 1/9/2007 9:16:12 AM   
akame


Posts: 64
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		DO this thing BD/sm? I'm sure we have all been asked this question. I know I have way too many times to count. So far all i've seen is answers like "i like it" or, "i just want to" etc..
I have been thinking about this question since the beginning. Why was I wanting to do this? Why did I want someone to do some of the things I do want?
Well, I finally found an answer that satisfies my own mind as well as those that are asking. "I'm hard wired for this" this body, the one I occupy at this point in time seems to like it so...Why would I not do it?"
I like crunchy PB, you like creamy, I love extremely dark chocolate, you think it tastes like crap.
we are hard wired differently then each other, so, when someone asks you the big WHY? just tell them your body is hard wired for it just as there is not,
hugzzz,
me

_____________________________

"We are the people with such righteous ideas" Bob Hollister.
"It's the fact that we are all different, that makes us the same." Billie Myers.
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 9:22:06 AM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline
quote:

we are hard wired differently then each other, so, when someone asks you the big WHY? just tell them your body is hard wired for it just as there is not,


I think that this is true for some people, and not true for others. I feel I was born with a submissive nature, and I have decided not to be ashamed of that within me.

As far as hard wired to be a masochist, I do not know if I am or not. I think that my desire to bottom sexually is perhaps innate, but there is another motivation for me, I am and have always been somewhat of a rebel. I like that aspect of myself, I love that I am willing to take steps into realms that other people reject. I think a lot of people have thoughts about WIITWD, but not everyone has the courage to embrace it, and face themselves.

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to akame)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 9:22:40 AM   
WorldofSilence


Posts: 114
Joined: 6/14/2006
Status: offline 		Thats an interesting point.

However I think not everyone is hardwired into this, some grow into it.

What I mean by that is some people Myself included don't think we were born with a "I'm a sadist and I'm quite kinky" switch permentantly on in our skull (this is an example) :)  I grew into it to be perfectly honest, fighting for My rights to education and to be treated as an equal in terms of employment etc etc, so with time I evolved into being Dominant, because I had to be in order to get anywhere in life. Then I stumbled across the whole BDSM thing through a friend who mentioned this "streak" I have within.

However I do agree with your point some are born with this be it through genes,spirtually or whatever, and then there are some who have evolved into it.

Just My two cents :)

WoS

< Message edited by WorldofSilence -- 1/9/2007 9:24:27 AM >

_____________________________

"Beware Hearing loss. If found please return to owner.Been missing since 1981. Reward on return"

(in reply to akame)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 9:25:13 AM   
ardelle


Posts: 63
Status: offline 		Greetings
 
i submit because it is my nature to do so

_____________________________

i wish you well

josie

(in reply to akame)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 9:42:04 AM   
MasterGremlin


Posts: 230
Joined: 12/30/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ardelle

Greetings
 
i submit because it is my nature to do so


Here! Here!

Cordially,
minxy

(in reply to ardelle)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 9:54:29 AM   
onestandingstill


Posts: 1335
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline 		I'm glad you found the reason that makes sense to you.
I think if you ask twenty subs you'll get 18 different answers and two who will give the same as another out of peer pressure or lack of self dicovery enough to have one of their own.
Me it's about not having to be in charge or in control, safety and comfort in following a leader, and a desire to serve.
THe desire to help others and be of service is hard wired, but I think the rest was developed over my life based on circumstances I had to deal with.
suzanne

(in reply to akame)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 10:12:25 AM   
tearfulsurrender


Posts: 30
Joined: 12/29/2006
Status: offline 		This is a topic that was on my mind a great deal yesteday.  Why do i crave an authority figure all the time?  Why do i need to be told what to do, how to do it and when to do it?  I spent several hours thinking about this.  I was a very rebellious child and teenager.  I had extremely strict parents.  When they said one thing, i did the exact opposite even when i knew the consiquences.  When i was paddled at school or came home and dad spanked me with his belt, you would have thought someone was killing me.  I never "stood there and took it"  I left home when i was 16 years old because i could no longer deal with the restrictions they imposed on me and if i had to hear "as long as you live under my roof you will live my my rules" one more time, i think my head would have come flying right off my shoulders.

So, fast forward three years to when im 19.  All of a sudden, i find myself dating older men who boss me around...and im loving it!  When i heard about the wonders of the internet shortly there after, i found myself reading stories and quips from other girls like me.  The more i read the more i was turned on and intrigued about this world they called BDSM.  One would think that i would have naturally identifed as a Top, but oh no!! I needed a Daddy! 

Some people feel they are hardwired for this lifestyle, and that may be true.  I think i just got tired of fighting.  I was tired of always being the one in control and making for the most part the WRONG decisions.  After years and years of struggling with this, i finally came to terms with what i needed; a stern displinarian.  There are certinaly times when the hard headedness in me comes out... but i quickly remind myself how hard that life was and i soften.  I wasnt born submissive, i grew into it.

tearful

(in reply to MasterGremlin)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 10:13:50 AM   
missturbation


Posts: 8290
Joined: 2/12/2006
From: another planet
Status: offline 		I think i was born submissive therefore yes part of the reason has to be hard wiring for me. I was also born with the ability to make choices though and this lifestyle is the one i choose to live. I do not believe i can live without being comfortable in my own skin and as well as other aspects of myself i have learnt to accept bdsm is a part of me.

_____________________________

What you don't witness with your eyes, don't witness with your mouth. Proverb.

If it fit's in a toaster, i can cook it.

Buying 10 item's or less is not shopping !!

(in reply to onestandingstill)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 10:15:02 AM   
Elegant


Posts: 1024
Joined: 3/15/2005
Status: offline
  • I submit to Master Archer because I wish to honor him in that way.I do not submit to everyone.
  • My overall personality is not submissive.
  • I am slave to Master Archer because he chose me and I chose to be his slave.
  • I serve because it is my calling.I serve myself, Master Archer and whoever he requests me to serve.
  • I bottom to pain because it feels so good!


_____________________________

Elegant
~Slave To Master Archer

http://www.FantasiesInLeather.com

(in reply to akame)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 10:35:33 AM   
onestandingstill


Posts: 1335
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: tearfulsurrender

This is a topic that was on my mind a great deal yesteday.  Why do i crave an authority figure all the time?  Why do i need to be told what to do, how to do it and when to do it?  I spent several hours thinking about this.  I was a very rebellious child and teenager.  I had extremely strict parents.  When they said one thing, i did the exact opposite even when i knew the consiquences.  When i was paddled at school or came home and dad spanked me with his belt, you would have thought someone was killing me.  I never "stood there and took it"  I left home when i was 16 years old because i could no longer deal with the restrictions they imposed on me and if i had to hear "as long as you live under my roof you will live my my rules" one more time, i think my head would have come flying right off my shoulders.

So, fast forward three years to when im 19.  All of a sudden, i find myself dating older men who boss me around...and im loving it!  When i heard about the wonders of the internet shortly there after, i found myself reading stories and quips from other girls like me.  The more i read the more i was turned on and intrigued about this world they called BDSM.  One would think that i would have naturally identifed as a Top, but oh no!! I needed a Daddy! 

Some people feel they are hardwired for this lifestyle, and that may be true.  I think i just got tired of fighting.  I was tired of always being the one in control and making for the most part the WRONG decisions.  After years and years of struggling with this, i finally came to terms with what i needed; a stern displinarian.  There are certinaly times when the hard headedness in me comes out... but i quickly remind myself how hard that life was and i soften.  I wasnt born submissive, i grew into it.

tearful

Hi tearful,
To me it sounds like you seek security in someone controlling you because you equate that with love since it's how you were treated by the people you loved most that gave you guidance when you were little.
In physically abusive relationship studies I read about they say how this equating your childhood with love and security good or bad is very common. 
Most people look for partners who have some habits like our parents or guardians had in our lives as a child even if we hate the habit.
suzanne

(in reply to tearfulsurrender)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 12:27:28 PM   
Devilslilsister


Posts: 1262
Joined: 8/3/2006
Status: offline
quote:

Most people look for partners who have some habits like our parents or guardians had in our lives as a child even if we hate the habit.


Good lord!!  Does that mean my Master is in some shape or form like my stepfather??  ::sigh:: i'll be off to the worry board soon.... lol

I think i am in all of this because i am looking for myself.  Trying to locate my soul and what would appease it.  Soul searching, if you will.  On this path, i've also found many other wonderful things and even some memories.  I havent yet figured out the destination - but i'm getting closer all the time.

and then i got stuck here.  LOL


_____________________________

My ability to cope with BS is at an all time low - me

i may look like i'm doing nothing, but i'm very busy at a cellular level

(in reply to onestandingstill)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 12:31:23 PM   
crouchingtigress


Posts: 4387
Joined: 3/19/2006
From: Maui
Status: offline 		i have always flourished in situations of structure and control, and lanquished in situations where there is no structure or accountability.
 
i have always been a masochist, i enjoy pain as a way of experiancing release, relaxation, control, pride, power and being high.
 
and i enjoy testing myself and my lovers pushing myself and them to near breaking points and pulling back again.
 
i like exploring the human body and the human psyche and the spiritual catharsis of the two diametrically opposed...ie:humiliated and  soaking wet
 
 
 
 

_____________________________


Service slut, durable plaything, and ponypenquincatdogpig, to Lee Harrington

This is him

"Its none of my buisness what other people think of me."




(in reply to onestandingstill)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 2:36:12 PM   
junecleaver


Posts: 1145
Joined: 4/6/2005
Status: offline 		I've been thinking about this a lot. I still haven't come to a real conclusion, but it's interesting to read where others are coming from.

_____________________________


"No one will ever win the battle of the sexes; there's too much fraternizing with the enemy. "
--Henry A. Kissinger

(in reply to crouchingtigress)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 5:41:38 PM   
mbes


Posts: 465
Joined: 12/14/2006
Status: offline 		I'm still at the start of the journey into myself, but I do this because my whole life I've felt "wrong" in my skin and as if I was searching for something.
Since beginning, I've found peace.
I will continue so long as that is true.

(in reply to junecleaver)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 5:47:44 PM   
Zsuzsanna


Posts: 108
Joined: 12/17/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: akame

DO this thing BD/sm? I'm sure we have all been asked this question. I know I have way too many times to count. So far all i've seen is answers like "i like it" or, "i just want to" etc..
I have been thinking about this question since the beginning. Why was I wanting to do this? Why did I want someone to do some of the things I do want?
Well, I finally found an answer that satisfies my own mind as well as those that are asking. "I'm hard wired for this" this body, the one I occupy at this point in time seems to like it so...Why would I not do it?"
I like crunchy PB, you like creamy, I love extremely dark chocolate, you think it tastes like crap.
we are hard wired differently then each other, so, when someone asks you the big WHY? just tell them your body is hard wired for it just as there is not,
hugzzz,
me

"Why wouldn't I? Being tied up and spanked? I don't see how you think it's NOT hot?" is the proper answer for me.

_____________________________

"Somewhere Ralphie smiles and says enjoy her every cry." Tori Amos

(in reply to akame)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Why do you... - 1/9/2007 9:31:43 PM   
ownedgirlie


Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline 		Because I must.

(in reply to akame)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Why do you... - 1/10/2007 1:46:46 AM   
sadomasokisti


Posts: 221
Joined: 10/20/2005
From: Iceland
Status: offline 		The best answer I have heard to this question is "Guess I'm lucky".

Bondage games have as long as I can remember been of interest to me.  Playmo figures were even frequently bound and various versions of cops and robbers also quite frequent.

I bought my first "BDSM toy" when I was 12 or 13.  It was a dog collar in a pet shop.  I have never had a dog.

_____________________________


Pain is good. Extreme pain is extremely good

(in reply to ownedgirlie)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Why do you... - 2/15/2007 8:28:32 PM   
SATANMAN


Posts: 72
Joined: 2/8/2006
Status: offline 		i showed my toys i bought out of curiousity to my now slave and he wanted and still does and so do i.

(in reply to sadomasokisti)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Why do you... - 2/15/2007 9:37:56 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline 		I do it because I am a submissive. Even in a vanilla relationship I would be submitting to his/her desires.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to akame)
Profile   Post #: 19
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