Domme or Spoilt Brat?

Domme or Spoilt Brat? (Full Version)

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LadySonelle -> Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 3:31:18 PM)
Is it just My perception that's askew, or are the newer Dommes out there generally a shrieking lot of spoilt children? It takes nothing to "be a Domme" if all one has to do is set up a site, begin ranting on about how one is "Gddess Btch Divine Queen!" etc and pose for a "skewer up the bum" photograph! Ladies who do that head high pose don't quite realise, that, unless done properly, the result is less "visibly-dominant" and more "gigged-frog in appearance. In actuality, the more power one actually wields, the less "commanding" one has to behave. When was the last time anyone say Queen Exizabeth II or the Pope make an inperious or haughty gesture or say a commanding word? Certainly they do not ever pose for those imperious photos! TRUE power, world power, is carried graciously. True power is never snappish or violent. It does not NEED to be! (this is one reason I do not respect our President! he is SUCH a soi-dissant "cowboy" he makes powerful people cringe to watch him!) If any Dominant, Female or male, desires to be truly powerful, then study those who ARE truly powerful! Ask yourself, how did She/he GET there? Except for hereditary rule, such as the Queen or other royalty, true power arises from self control, grace and reserve, action when it is needed, knowledge and understatement! Just a word to the wise out there. If you feel you have to stamp, scream and pose with whips, kneeling slaves and leather to be noticed, re-think your own power and what it arises from. You may not be the Domme you think you are! Lady Sonelle

ProtagonistLily -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 3:44:26 PM)
quote: Is it just My perception that's askew, or are the newer Dommes out there generally a shrieking lot of spoilt children? It takes nothing to "be a Domme" if all one has to do is set up a site, begin ranting on about how one is "Gddess Btch Divine Queen!" etc and pose for a "skewer up the bum" photograph! Ladies who do that head high pose don't quite realise, that, unless done properly, the result is less "visibly-dominant" and more "gigged-frog in appearance. In actuality, the more power one actually wields, the less "commanding" one has to behave. When was the last time anyone say Queen Exizabeth II or the Pope make an inperious or haughty gesture or say a commanding word? Certainly they do not ever pose for those imperious photos! TRUE power, world power, is carried graciously. True power is never snappish or violent. It does not NEED to be! (this is one reason I do not respect our President! he is SUCH a soi-dissant "cowboy" he makes powerful people cringe to watch him!) If any Dominant, Female or male, desires to be truly powerful, then study those who ARE truly powerful! Ask yourself, how did She/he GET there? Except for hereditary rule, such as the Queen or other royalty, true power arises from self control, grace and reserve, action when it is needed, knowledge and understatement! Just a word to the wise out there. If you feel you have to stamp, scream and pose with whips, kneeling slaves and leather to be noticed, re-think your own power and what it arises from. You may not be the Domme you think you are! Lady Sonelle ~shrugs~ I was always taught everyone's kinks were Ok as long as they were SSC. I really don't think it's my call to judge others. If it works for the...God speed. Lily

LadyAngelika -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 4:15:31 PM)
Every woman can domme the way she wants. I personally am not the shreiking type, nor do I find it particularly appealing. However, if it gets her rocks off and it gets some guy's rocks off then there you go: little match made in heaven! One of the most important lessons I've learned is finding ways to deal with people who's approach is not like mine. I don't always succeed, but I think I'm getting better at it every time I try. quote: Is it just My perception that's askew, or are the newer Dommes out there generally a shrieking lot of spoilt children? I don't notice an alarming change. Are you talking about on the boards? In your RL scene? Where exactly... - LA

MsSilvie -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 5:28:22 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily ~shrugs~ I was always taught everyone's kinks were Ok as long as they were SSC. I really don't think it's my call to judge others. If it works for the...God speed. Lily Anyone's kink is ok, even if it's not SSC, as long as everyone involved agrees to it. And, of course, it is equally OK for the rest of us to laugh our collective butts off at posturing dimwits too. Behavior in a public forum invites public comment and reaction. If someone doesn't like that, I kindly suggest to modify his/her public behavior.

BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 5:38:24 PM)
I'm a newer Domme, not a shrieking type/leather posing one, but I have chat with plenty of men who say they like just the type you described as undommely... I don't judge them, since I'm not interested in them, I don't care what they act/look/sound like; I also figure if it gets them and their responders hot, more power to them. M

topcat -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 5:43:12 PM)
Milady Sonelle- these damn kids today- I tell ya. Back in our day it was diffent all right. Back when we had to make our own leather from the cow, when all we had was rocks and sticks to hit each other with- or sometimes bob, but he was heavy and hard to aim. They just don't know, these kids. <g> Now seriuosly- the ones that stomp their little feet and scream "I am DOMME I am I am!" are always with us- but they either just fade off, whining into the sunset, or suddenly are dance around in their knees claiming "ho i am a sub- I am I am!" or -sometimes -they even grow up and get a clue. But, Milady- far be it for me to take you to task- but aren't they really beneath your notice? not worthy of your dignity and regard? I do sympathise, BTW, some of em I just want to squash<g>. But I don't... Stay warm, Lawrence

MsSilvie -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 5:50:03 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: topcat Back in our day it was diffent all right. Back when we had to make our own leather from the cow, when all we had was rocks and sticks to hit each other with- or sometimes bob, but he was heavy and hard to aim. They just don't know, these kids. <g> You forgot the part about in our bare feet, uphill, both ways...

BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 5:57:10 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: topcat these damn kids today- I tell ya. Back in our day it was diffent all right. Back when we had to make our own leather from the cow, when all we had was rocks and sticks to hit each other with- or sometimes bob, but he was heavy and hard to aim. They just don't know, these kids. Lawrence LMAO, thank God I missed those days; I surely would have stayed a bratty screaming Domme than... Thanks for the loud laugh at work. M

NATI -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 6:10:15 PM)
quote: LMAO, thank God I missed those days; I surely would have stayed a bratty screaming Domme than... Thanks for the loud laugh at work. M I can only imagine what it must have been like to be clocked by a badly aimed Bob - yeeowch.

Tempestspet -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 6:31:39 PM)
Seems to me, that the ones you may be talking about are the same that make me laugh. The one's who graduated high school a few months ago, or made it half way through their first year in college, and discovered they needed someone other than daddy to buy them all their new cars, clothes, and trinkets. They wouldn't think of earning.... yes I know they swinging a flogger or whip, crop, or paddle can be laborous. That's not sarcastic, I've tried it, Master thought it would be good to see the work from the other end. And I found out. To all the dominants out there... kudos!! and many thanks!! It's tiring, it is. And this girl has a new apreciation for it too. smiles But those I spoke of above, I fear the innocent newbie that doesn't understand and gets all screwed with one of those. Maybe one day they will grow up and do good, in retribution for the ones they harmed on the road up becuase all they figured it took, was them being a bitchy brat, and a guy to open his wallet. Thank you for listening... ...(seems I'm on quite a rant tonight..... sheesh) Tempest's pet

SweetDommes -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 6:50:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LadySonelle Is it just My perception that's askew, or are the newer Dommes out there generally a shrieking lot of spoilt children? Not all of us are like that ... and some of us "newer Dommes" are laughing at the 'kiddies playing' just as hard as y'all are ... and for the record, I've seen some claiming to be in the lifestyle 20+ years who are just as bad if not worse than the "newbies"

BeachMystress -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 7:05:27 PM)
I don't see that type of behaviour as "new" necessarily. Some Domme never figure out that being Dominant doesn't equal being a conceited bitch. I see it more of an insecurity issue. The ones who do that seem to feel if they don't tell everyone how incrediably wonderful they are, no one will notice. They don't piss me off, as Tempestspet said, they make me laugh. I try to be polite enough not to do it to their faces, as their lack of breeding should not cause me to forget mine.

ScooterTrash -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 7:49:56 PM)
I have seen this behavour from both supposed long timers as well as the newbies. I do have a problem with a 20 year old having never even been a sub to trying to assume a Dominant stance. BUT, I can deal with this much better if they show proper protocol and are respectful of all. Even a well established Dom/me will make me flinch if they believe they are entitled by their stature alone to spout out the famous "on your knees bitch" to anyone. The best suggestion I have or can do myself is to simply try to PM the offender and suggest they modify their behavour and explain that they will go a lot further, if they learn that earning respect is much more resourceful than demanding it. Bottom line..too bad some sort of training isn't required for Dominants (as it generally is for subs) and isn't it a shame that there simply is no rule book to refer to, for Dom/mes.

Tempestspet -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 8:17:45 PM)
perhaps a smart sub, will ask the quesitons though.... to find out if the dominant has had any sort of training. It's out there in the form of classes, seminars and such. I think subs need to just take more responsiblity for what they get themselves into. And simply not start pointing fingers at the doms, creating a bad name for many, I imagine, that do not deserve it. Exceelent post though ScooterTrash, I happily agree with you.. Tempest's pet This will teach me to send without reading everything...grins.... Seems I have heard of somewebsites and books geared for doms.

BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 8:30:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ScooterTrash I have seen this behavour from both supposed long timers as well as the newbies. Bottom line..too bad some sort of training isn't required for Dominants (as it generally is for subs) and isn't it a shame that there simply is no rule book to refer to, for Dom/mes. I swear I've met 1 guy and chat with many others who like the pose or as BeachMystress put it "conceited bitch" routine. I think there is a rule book, or several:I've read "Screw the roses...", "The Loving Dominant", "Spare the rod...", "The Mistress Manual" among others... It's not required anymore than required sub/slave training (as far as I know of), but just as I expect my sub counterpart to learn how to honor me with his submission by learning what pleases me, so too will I learn how to care for him/his needs. M

LadyAngelika -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/26/2005 11:41:30 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: topcat I do sympathise, BTW, some of em I just want to squash<g>. But I don't... Which is why I have the utmost respect for you my dear friend. - LA

MistressIsadora -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/27/2005 3:21:22 AM)
Yes, there are many that seem to pop up everyday all over the net. Claiming a title (i.e. Mistress, Domina, Goddess, Master, etc.) is nothing. Earning the title is a privelege, and only should be used by those with the skills. If I were a sub/slave I would be very cautious of someone extremely new. For those, who seek the services of a Professional Domina, do your homework. For the newbies, pick up a book and read!!!! Regard, Mistress Isadora

BeachMystress -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/27/2005 11:19:04 AM)
It is amazing how many people show up online and expect to be granted Dominant status just because they said so. You often meet this breed in chat rooms, complaining about capitals and insisting that their full names be used. They parrot back, often incorrectly the stuff they have read on websites, but when you try to engage them in an in-depth conversation, they either dodge the issue or try winging it without much success. I agree with Mistress Isadora. RESEARCH before you play. Ask for references. Both Pro and Lifestyle should be able to provide them. If they can't, or their references are all of the online variety, that doesn't mean do not play with them- we all started somewhere- it means be careful and mindful of your own safety.

sting516 -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/27/2005 11:40:27 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MistressIsadora Yes, there are many that seem to pop up everyday all over the net. Claiming a title (i.e. Mistress, Domina, Goddess, Master, etc.) is nothing. Earning the title is a privelege, and only should be used by those with the skills. If I were a sub/slave I would be very cautious of someone extremely new. For those, who seek the services of a Professional Domina, do your homework. For the newbies, pick up a book and read!!!! Regard, Mistress Isadora i so agree with this point...while there are plusses and minuses to most things, the Old Guard philosophy that one had to earn their title as a Dominant by enduring training as a submissive and working their way up to Dominant, if that was their desire, makes so much more sense now...of course, any philosophy can be bastardized, but at least it would make subs feel that one had to have some level of training before declaring themself Dominant. As always, your mileage may vary. sting

Darthbetta -> RE: Domme or Spoilt Brat? (2/27/2005 1:03:54 PM)
I don't understand what this thread is really all about. can someone please "Let the proper punctuation authorities" know of it's existance ? thanks :) THE MANAGEMENT.

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