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GddssBella -> Titles, labels, & myths.... (2/27/2005 1:20:57 PM)
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G'aftternoon all:
I've never been comfortable with the designation of "Mistress". As in the heading of this forum. In vanilla society it denotes "the other woman". Which, as any female dominant will tell you, is unacceptable. No one wants to play second fiddle.
From a friend on another group:
quote:
But when I hear the term Mistress outside of our Lifestyle, the first thing I think of ...well..er...a woman who is kept by a married man. Not a woman who has power, authority or ownership as it is also defined. Interesting how one word can have such opposite meanings.
Secondly: the brother column: "Ask a Master". Not all male dominants are qualified for that title. Simply being in the top or dom role doesn't qualify one instantly. Then again, I don't think any human being can earn that title, male or female, as life is a continuous process & one should never stop learning.
The following is a c,c,p'd post I made to the other group:
quote:
On another note, my own screen name. "GoddessBellissima". Kinda full
of itself, on it's own. My intention though was descriptive rather
than a self imposed honorific. There are 5 arch-typical roles that
female dominants generally fall into. (I will not list/describe them
all, merely give you the frame of reference & you can read for
yourselves: "The Mistress Manual" by Mistress Lorelei available
through greenerypress.com - nice lil handbook during my earlier
times) My preference is the Goddess role. She who is to be
worshipped, adored, put on a pedestal, yada, yada, yada, ad
nauseum/infinitum. I in no way identify myself as a deity. That
would be foolhardy in the extreme & pompous as hell. I simply enjoy
being pampered. What woman wouldn't?? The latter part of my screen
name was taken from a nick name an old boyfriend tagged me with. He
used to call me "Mia Bellissima". Italian for "My Beautiful". Or
some other rough translation thereof. I lopped off the possessive, &
slapped the two together. Not because my vanity demands a lofty
label but because, heck, it sounds good that way, lol.
I'm getting a burning sensation around the ears.... I can almost
HEAR the clamoring over this ~softer~ side. What about my sadistic
nature known to so many? That's simple. I do flip between the
Goddess & the Amazon at will. It's just my nature. Don't try to
figure it out. I gave up ages ago, hehe.
Personally, I'm never comfortable with titles, honorifics, etc. Even
in scene. I designate the usage of the Goddess title during a scene
though because it appears to make the sub/bottom/slave more at ease.
It establishes a heirarachy in which they can relax, give over
control & find freedom in their letting go. I think a basic "Ma'am"
is a good all around term because it denotes deference without
actually having to go into all the other factors. Such as intimacy,
romance, etc.
I certainly don't feel either gender is superior to the other.
Respect should never be given, it better damn well be earned!
Courtesy on the other hand, is just good manners. All should
practice it, especially if they'd like to have it returned.
Felt it would save time & typing.[;)] Pros? Cons?
I do so love stirring up a good storm!
Stay safe, play nice, & share your toys w/ others....
[:D]
Bella
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