Dom under a dom? (Full Version)

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justfunco -> Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 10:58:56 AM)

Most of my fantasies are dom... But have you ever saw a Dom female so hot you wouldn't mind submitting to them? Normally the thought of being a submissive is almost scary to me. I just wouldn't like being in that position.




TallDarkAndWitty -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 11:02:19 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: justfunco
But have you ever saw a Dom female so hot you wouldn't mind submitting to them?


My quite dominant girlfriend (who is amazingly hot) has asked that I bottom for her some time. I certainly will do it, as she has bottomed for me, but being a bottom for a bit of bondage and sensation play, and submitting are two entirely different things.

I am just not wired to submit...it irks me. I will do almost anything if it comes in the shell of a polite request, and I feel I can freely say no. Tell me to do someting, or make me feel that I really have no choice, and I get grumpy.

Taggard




justfunco -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 11:08:57 AM)

I hear you... And in most cases (if not all) I'd feel the same way.

What's kind of interesting is how most males are doms and most females are submissives.. Males can be quite aggressive and rude and females can be very gentle and fragile. I find it kind of ironic that females want to submit more often then not. Not that I'm complaining mind you.. But one of those things that make you wonder..





EmeraldSlave2 -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 11:20:38 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: justfunco
What's kind of interesting is how most males are doms and most females are submissives..

What on earth makes you think this?? Have you seen the numbers of male subs around? Female doms?

quote:

Males can be quite aggressive and rude and females can be very gentle and fragile.

Thank you Mr. Stereotype. Females can be the most catty, bitchy, aggressive, nastiest people alive.

quote:

I find it kind of ironic that females want to submit more often then not. Not that I'm complaining mind you.. But one of those things that make you wonder.

I think that's a big overgeneralization.






justfunco -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 11:46:13 AM)

Sorry, just based this on search results of simply "females" in my state, the amount of submissives are 3-4 to 1.

Trust me I understand females being nasty/bitchy.. all too well infact.. But arent they still underlyingly gentle when it comes to sexuality? Has been my observation anyway.

NOT trying to stereotype or offend anyone!!! Sorry if you were offended.




EmeraldSlave2 -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 11:51:12 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: justfunco
Sorry, just based this on search results of simply "females" in my state, the amount of submissives are 3-4 to 1.

I assume you mean like an online profile search but not real life exposure? And how much of that is done in hetero and how much is done with mix/homosexual company?
quote:


Trust me I understand females being nasty/bitchy.. all too well infact.. But arent they still underlyingly gentle when it comes to sexuality? Has been my observation anyway.

Look I'm not going to say this doesn't happen. Of course lots of women are passive about their sexuality, lots of women aren't comfortable being aggressive and many prefer to not have to take control in the bedroom. Most of the women I have been with were gentler in bed, they also identified as mostly het/some bi.

But to say it's an overwhelming trait- no way. Women are aggressive and desireous and JUST as much predators and wild in bed as males are. We're taught not to be, we're taught to be passive and not want our own needs and desires met. We're taught to be embarassed about teaching others how to make us happy in bed, or that it's insulting to a man if we please ourselves. The reality is, there's simply no universal to apply here. There's far too many exceptions and far too many aggressive women to lump things together.

quote:


NOT trying to stereotype or offend anyone!!! Sorry if you were offended.


It takes a lot of work to try and offend me, don't worry about that.




perverseangelic -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 11:51:48 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: justfunco

Sorry, just based this on search results of simply "females" in my state, the amount of submissives are 3-4 to 1.

Trust me I understand females being nasty/bitchy.. all too well infact.. But arent they still underlyingly gentle when it comes to sexuality? Has been my observation anyway.

NOT trying to stereotype or offend anyone!!! Sorry if you were offended.


Oh good lord. If you aren't trying to stereotype, then please don't.

No, we are not more gentle when it comes to sexuality. Some women are. Just like some men are. Not even all submissive women are gentle when it comes to sexuality. Hell, I'm downright -agressive- in my submission.

Generalizations = a bad idea, in general :)




justfunco -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 11:57:30 AM)

Well anyway.. I was far less trying to make a generalization as I just found it ironic from my point of view. I'm brand new to this so sorry if I sound naive. But every single woman I met has not even had any desire to explore sexuality in the way people do here.




MidnightWriter -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 11:59:06 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: justfunco

Most of my fantasies are dom... But have you ever saw a Dom female so hot you wouldn't mind submitting to them?

Been there, done that. Once simply because she was so damn hot, but the other times to gain a better understanding of submissive mindset.

I can't claim to have come up Old Guard style - I didn't. There is, however, some logic behind their "you've gotta sub before you can dom well" philosophy - so I explored that. I won't say everyone should - but I will say that I got some valuable lessons that way.
quote:

Normally the thought of being a submissive is almost scary to me. I just wouldn't like being in that position.

Your call, but relax a tad, eh? It may not be pleasant, but you learn something about yourself, it's as temporary as you wish it to be, and it doesn't detract at all from your domliness. IMO, the gains outweigh the perils - it doesn't need to be scary.




TallDarkAndWitty -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 12:02:22 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: perverseangelic
Hell, I'm downright -agressive- in my submission.


There is nothing that this dominant, yet somewhat passive, man finds more attractive than an agressively submissive woman.

I think finding the real wild ones is a bit more work...but, oh my, it is worth it!

Taggard




justfunco -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 12:05:15 PM)

quote:


Your call, but relax a tad, eh? It may not be pleasant, but you learn something about yourself, it's as temporary as you wish it to be, and it doesn't detract at all from your domliness. IMO, the gains outweigh the perils - it doesn't need to be scary.


OK maybe this will give you an idea. I playfully let my wife handcuff me to the bed... And I was scared for MY LIFE. Like I thought she was going to murder me or something. NOT a fun feeling. Not that I wouldn't mind trying again but it was a very unexpected feeling.




Mercnbeth -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 12:11:15 PM)

quote:

I playfully let my wife handcuff me to the bed... And I was scared for MY LIFE. Like I thought she was going to murder me or something.


a lot of men feel that way about their wives---distrusting to the point of paranoia. think that feeds the divorce rate at all?

but seriously, TRUST is an essential part of ANY successful relationship...imagine the relationship you could have with a person outside the bedroom if you maintain trust with them enough to handcuff you to the bed whenever they choose inside the bedroom. that's the opposite of scary......bliss.




justfunco -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 12:13:50 PM)

quote:


a lot of men feel that way about their wives---distrusting to the point of paranoia. think that feeds the divorce rate at all?


again, understand all too well...as well as the nasty/bitch comments earlier in the thread ;)

I hear ya.. be interesting if that changes with my wife.




BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 2:40:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: justfunco
quote:


a lot of men feel that way about their wives---distrusting to the point of paranoia. think that feeds the divorce rate at all?

again, understand all too well...as well as the nasty/bitch comments earlier in the thread ;)

Justfunco,
I like your thread Idea...
I think a lot of people toy with the idea of switching what they know to be their natural role when they see someone who's totally awesome looking (I've briefly daydreamed about 1 or 2 men on these boards)... I've been passive like you describe in the past because that's the way I grew up, but I could never as I now know myself call myself submissive; I could pretend to be for a little while, but over time, it would massively grate on my nerves and probably make me insane. We are all a combination of our nature/nurture influences, and men and women are different in some ways, though not necessarily in the ways you point out of sexual passivity.

A man who doesn't trust his wife and fears death if she handcuffs him, probably should not be married to her as Merc said in his funny comment.
I'd like to point out though that referring to women as "nasty bitches" should NEVER be done, unless you're talking to your girlfriend/wife and she's turned on by that idea. M





justfunco -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 3:10:37 PM)

I apologize if you found that offensive.. I don't think I said it first though. :)

But, I don't speak of all woman, but just some women who seem deserve it... namely, more personally, my wife at times. Notice the interest in the mention of divorce?

Oh yeah, anyone know any good divorce forums to discusst THAT? :) Sure I'd like to try to fix it first.. but hey.. it's a serious question BTW, anyone know any?







NoPinkBalloons -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 3:27:51 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: justfunco

Most of my fantasies are dom... But have you ever saw a Dom female so hot you wouldn't mind submitting to them? Normally the thought of being a submissive is almost scary to me. I just wouldn't like being in that position.


What I've seen is men who are willing to fake anything just for a shot at a woman they think is super hot. I suppose it should be a compliment, but I find it rather insulting personally. I suppose if you were honest about not really wanting to submit (or dominate as the case may be), and that you were just doing it cuz you thought she was the creme de la creme it might go over better.




newflowers -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 3:38:59 PM)

quote:

Trust me I understand females being nasty/bitchy.. all too well infact.. But arent they still underlyingly gentle when it comes to sexuality? Has been my observation anyway.


I usually like o read a thread before I respond...however...

I'm thinking you need to go out and observe again. A little knowledge is a dangerous stereotype.

newflowers




justfunco -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 4:07:49 PM)

quote:


I usually like o read a thread before I respond...however...

I'm thinking you need to go out and observe again. A little knowledge is a dangerous stereotype.

newflowers


Then perhaps you should have. Probably would have read the part that I said it was from my point of view, that it was ironic to *me* because I've only known woman who seemed this way... And that I'm sorry that I'm naive because I'm completely new to this scene. Yup, sounds like you should have read the whole thread. :)




MrThorns -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 4:07:49 PM)

We went to see Diva Midori teach the subject of "Aural Sex" about a year and a half ago. My GAWD! That has got to be one of the sexiest women I have ever encountered. Grace, power, intelligence...all rolled up into a 5'2-ish package. (Mind you, a 5'2-ish package that has a reputation for making strong men weep like a six-year old girl with a skinned knee...)
But alas, with all of her grace...all of her power...and all of her charm, I simply couldn't imagine submitting to her.

~Thorns




SireKane -> RE: Dom under a dom? (2/28/2005 4:16:43 PM)

You are a closet sub. Accept it and find yourself a domme.

Kane




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