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karensa -> Dumped (1/18/2007 6:22:51 AM)
We had been chatting for weeks, we got on really well, lots of text messages, phone calls each day, online chatting. There were many miles inbetween us but we thought it was worth the effort for we had a certain chemisty. We decided to meet to see if we had that chemistry face to face, we did. We had a wondeful time and decided to go forward into a D/s relationship together. We were chatting of limits and boundries ... while being open and honest i mentioned that i enjoyed penetrative sex, he became very objectional and left the conversation, i then received an e-mail saying goodbye, i am so upset we had so many plans. Do Doms usually leave their would be sub so very easily? Maybe i just wasnt worth the effort :-( . My profile is not active we both decided to deactivate and i am not ready to put mine back yet. I would appreciate some advice. Thank you.

onestandingstill -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 6:28:46 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: karensa We had been chatting for weeks, we got on really well, lots of text messages, phone calls each day, online chatting. There were many miles inbetween us but we thought it was worth the effort for we had a certain chemisty. We decided to meet to see if we had that chemistry face to face, we did. We had a wondeful time and decided to go forward into a D/s relationship together. We were chatting of limits and boundries ... while being open and honest i mentioned that i enjoyed penetrative sex, he became very objectional and left the conversation, i then received an e-mail saying goodbye, i am so upset we had so many plans. Do Doms usually leave their would be sub so very easily? Maybe i just wasnt worth the effort :-( . My profile is not active we both decided to deactivate and i am not ready to put mine back yet. I would appreciate some advice. Thank you. I would fully suggest if that's how he handled something you're better off without him. If chastity is against his rules to the point he'd flip out on you for saying you like it then he's not what he claims to be. He should have mentioned that up front or he should hve just explained his point without being so hostile. I would definately just cross him off my list and keep moving. If he behaves toward you over something as rational and normal as intercourse what's he going to do to you if you make a mistake and he punishes you? He just sends up the vicious red flag and the asshole red flag to me. HEAD FOR THE HILLS MISSY, BEFORE IT"S TOO LATE TO SAVE YOURSELF is my advice. suzanne

mnottertail -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 6:29:16 AM)
and of course you used the search button, ***............couldn't find a thing and decided to make a profile (prolly **) that is not findable and shoot oneliners to an old pervert like me and expect valid advice from these many ghosts in the machine? I guess that seems rather commonplace. Ron Same as the first one I sent you, with revisions because of age, but you were with a dom for quite sometime in that post. Now we got another same same..... I still say wanker, same as first time.

findmedaddy -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 6:36:26 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mnottertail and of course you used the search button, ***............couldn't find a thing and decided to make a profile (prolly **) that is not findable and shoot oneliners to an old pervert like me and expect valid advice from these many ghosts in the machine? I guess that seems rather commonplace. Ron Same as the first one I sent you, with revisions because of age, but you were with a dom for quite sometime in that post. Now we got another same same..... I still say wanker, same as first time. Ron, Your messages would be fun, like a crossword, if there were a number to call to crack the code. Well, they are fun, but I hardly ever understand them.

mnottertail -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 6:37:50 AM)
search the users posts to date (that is the key) LOLOLOLOLOL, CaptainConundrum Oh, yeah, and dont dumped and I got fucked posts belong in general forum before they get moved to random stupidity? or in ask a submissive if you want to be petted and empathy and sympathy? That has to be in the TOS somewhere...LOL

findmedaddy -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 6:54:17 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: mnottertail search the users posts to date (that is the key) LOLOLOLOLOL, CaptainConundrum Oh, yeah, and dont dumped and I got fucked posts belong in general forum before they get moved to random stupidity? or in ask a submissive if you want to be petted and empathy and sympathy? That has to be in the TOS somewhere...LOL I see, yes. I hope the question about where the post belongs wasn't addressed to me, because I'm on a relentless quest for sympathy and would post anywhere I thought I could get it (e.g., absolutely nowhere on collarme.com). My cat is a good listener, though, so it's ok, even if scientists have now determined that it's no longer therapeutic for me to hug and pat him.

michaelOfGeorgia -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 7:20:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: karensa We had been chatting for weeks, we got on really well, lots of text messages, phone calls each day, online chatting. There were many miles inbetween us but we thought it was worth the effort for we had a certain chemisty. We decided to meet to see if we had that chemistry face to face, we did. We had a wondeful time and decided to go forward into a D/s relationship together. We were chatting of limits and boundries ... while being open and honest i mentioned that i enjoyed penetrative sex, he became very objectional and left the conversation, i then received an e-mail saying goodbye, i am so upset we had so many plans. Do Doms usually leave their would be sub so very easily? Maybe i just wasnt worth the effort :-( . My profile is not active we both decided to deactivate and i am not ready to put mine back yet. I would appreciate some advice. Thank you. you're alot luckier than most. some people don't get passed the online bs. discussions made, possible meetings and collars mentioned...and then POOF it takes some time to trust again...believe me

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 7:27:58 AM)
I think you raised your expectations and commitment level too soon- but that's very normal for people. A lot of guys will be willing to be your dom as long as you don't question them or make them think about anything beyond their comfort zone. Once you do- they run for the hills (the good way) or they try and shame and guilt you into stopping (the bad way). Remember, a hot kinky date is a hot kinky date. Relationships take time to build, no matter how hot the chemistry may be. Now you have had an unfortuate but fairly mild bad experience and next time will know to go slower, be more thorough and take more time before making a commitment.

michaelOfGeorgia -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 7:38:07 AM)
quote: next time will know to go slower, be more thorough and take more time before making a commitment. i know this statement was meant for the OP, but i just had to say that, if i go any slower, snails would outrun me LOL

BDSM05478 -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 7:57:43 AM)
hold up....... he flipped out cause you wanted sex??? castrado for sure.

LadyKimberly33 -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 8:19:28 AM)
karensa I have had the same thing happen on the flip side, My sub thought it was not appropriate for a Mistress to want sex from her pet. Count yourself lucky he was gone before you got any more involved.

Celeste43 -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 8:36:54 AM)
It's okay for him to beat you black and blue but not to have sex with you? Very strange. I assume he has either weird hangups or a physical problem he's ashamed to talk about. Count yourself lucky in either case. Next time, try to meet for coffee halfway between a lot sooner. Before you build up so many hopes and invest so much.

Dnomyar -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 8:54:56 AM)
a Mistress should not have sex with her pets. Get a submissive for that.

dvart -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 9:16:18 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: karensa i then received an e-mail saying goodbye, i am so upset we had so many plans. This has touched a raw nerve with me. I am quite new to this, but it seems like people think that the internet gives them permission to behave in ways that they would never dream of doing in "normal" life. Either that or Collarme is filled with socially dysfunctional people. I can hardly count the number of times I have to talked to Women for long periods only to be dropped for no apparent reason. Ok they have found someone else, shit happens, but why not some kind of explanation ? You would never do it in real life, so why in cyberspace ? I am normally a trusting kind of person, but I feel this trust evaporating fast. Is kindness too much to expect?

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 9:18:41 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: dvart This has touched a raw nerve with me. I am quite new to this, but it seems like people think that the internet gives them permission to behave in ways that they would never dream of doing in "normal" life. Either that or Collarme is filled with socially dysfunctional people. Collarme is no exception to this, it happens everywhere. And from what I've seen, plenty of people do it in real life. Heck, they even have a TV show where Shannon Dougherty does the dumping for you! quote: Is kindness too much to expect? In this situation, yes.

LadyKimberly33 -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 9:19:17 AM)
thanks Dnomyar, sub=pet as that is what I called him, but you could have a point!!

Dnomyar -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 9:27:49 AM)
Just playing with you Lady Kimberly

Missokyst -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 9:34:07 AM)
Wait... He was against having sex? [image]http://www.collarchat.com/micons/m28.gif[/image] going back to bed Kyst quote: ORIGINAL: karensa i mentioned that i enjoyed penetrative sex, he became very objectional and left the conversation,

dvart -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 9:35:16 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross Collarme is no exception to this, it happens everywhere. But rape happens everywhere. Murder happens everywhere. Illegal invasions of other peoples countries happens. Bush/Blair happens. But that doesn't make it desirable or inevitable. No kindness = No trust = No society If you have to assume that everyone you meet is going to shit over you, what sort of world is that? (well Iraq I suppose)

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Dumped (1/18/2007 10:02:52 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: dvart No kindness = No trust = No society Well I think you're overgeneralizing. I said many people act like that- not all. Many people don't. quote: If you have to assume that everyone you meet is going to shit over you, what sort of world is that? (well Iraq I suppose) Assuming that all people will act kindly and mannerfully is as unrealistic and pointless as assuming that all people will act unkindly and unmannerfully. Online it's certainly best to have no expectations, and be pleasantly surprised when good things do happen. I generally expect people to act like most people generally act. Most people generally act like nice and decent people. Almost everyone acts like an asshole at least some of the time. If you let that some of the time become your focus then you will lose perspective on reality.

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