RE: tying the knot -- bondage marriage (Full Version)

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MasterLark -> RE: tying the knot -- bondage marriage (1/24/2007 2:31:08 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Midearthtrainer

First and foremost is: Will the two of you still be together, if there is NO lifestyle activities, after 6 months? 1 year? 5 years?  25 years?   If the answer is no or maybe, then rethink the marriage. A marriage can include a lifestyle, but cannot be based upon it.
That said; you can include in the vows - love honor and obey. You can write your own vows, to include that which is important to you. It's your ceremony.
This is a realtionship any way you look at it. Being a lifestyle based realtionship, it has to include some lifestyle elements in it everyday. If not, you will find that the everyday vanilla things tend to take over. Consistancy is the key. No matter how your relationship is structured, keeping things going, keeping things alive is important down the road. Who said, it had to include shared decision making?


I am presuming that the lifestyle never ends because each of us is predisposed either to be a Master or a slave and neither of us is vanilla.

I am more interested in the dynamics of the bondage marriage long term than the ceremony itself.  In fact, I wonder if a long term (10, 20, more years) bondage marriage can inherently work -- that's a question, not a statement.





MasterLark -> RE: tying the knot -- bondage marriage (1/27/2007 7:58:54 AM)

On another thread under Ask a Master, “Controlling your slave,” MasterHXB, asked this fine question: “What do you control and what do you not control in your slave's life?”   Several people agree with LeatherBentOne’s answer: “The list of what I DON"T control is shorter than the list of what I do, so hear goes:

Her money
Her job
Her relationship with her family
Her relationship with her friends

I'm not adverse to advising her and giving her my suggestions on these matters, but only if she asks my opinion.  If she was being harmed in any way by her own choices, I'd surely not wait for an invitation to intervene.”

So perhaps this is a good starting place to describe a bondage marriage, for some.

A bondage marriage means tying the knot (D/s, M/s) between two people, to include all the legal protections and obligations that a legal marriage grants but also an agreement (in a male Master, female slave/sub marriage) to HIS complete control and power over her and her agreement to that, except that HE will not control her money, her job, her relationship with her family and her relationship with her friends, unless she is being harmed by any of those.

Thoughts?

 




thedictatorslov -> RE: tying the knot -- bondage marriage (2/27/2007 6:08:37 AM)

Master and i have been together 21 years.




valeca -> RE: tying the knot -- bondage marriage (2/27/2007 6:55:04 AM)

I think it really depends on one's view of 'marriage'. 

I do feel I'm an equal partner.  That doesn't translate to His equal.  Just that each of us carry equal responsibilities in the relationship.  Different responsibilities, granted, but mine are no less vital to 'us' than His.  It's not a scale of 'more' or 'less'.  For us, it's more symbiotic.

We had a collaring ceremony and we had a legal wedding.  They allowed us to share our commitment to each other with friends and family, both 'nilla and not.  The ceremonies themselves didn't have different meanings--both were demonstrative of our commitment to each other, just with different audiences/props--nothing more, nothing less.  As His slave, I've commited to Him, as His wife, I've commited to Him.

The only difference I see is the marriage has given Him recognizable legal rights that a collaring didn't offer.





yugla -> RE: tying the knot -- bondage marriage (2/27/2007 5:37:54 PM)

Master Lark in response to your last question in your original post
-Recommend tying the knot, legally? –

and browsing the posts quickly my opinion is that if you are of a life style dominance mind set why would you wish to challenge who you are with the lingering possibility of a divorce? All the charisma, teachings and knowledge you posses will become moot in a legal contract of marriage. You may be brought down a level in your dominance once YOU are subjected to be the slave in a court of law.

Does it happen to all? No only about 1/2 and of those only a 1/3rd are what we label contested. That equates to playing Russian Roulette with a 6 shooter and one round. Not a rush that I enjoy so I would not play that game either.

Be Well

PS prenups serve no purpose except to create another income for lawyers in addition to divorce. Any agreement can be modified, changed or found to be retroactively moot; Entered under duress, coerced, in violation of a local, state or federal statute, conditions at the time of the divorce are not what were expected when the parties signed, conflict of different interpretations of intend meaning, etc.






azzmaster -> RE: tying the knot -- bondage marriage (2/27/2007 6:38:33 PM)

marriages in general seem to end in divorce. i think bondage marriages have a better shot cause the roles are alot more clearcut




alandraofMists -> RE: tying the knot -- bondage marriage (2/27/2007 8:14:44 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterLark

So perhaps this is a good starting place to describe a bondage marriage, for some.

A bondage marriage means tying the knot (D/s, M/s) between two people, to include all the legal protections and obligations that a legal marriage grants but also an agreement (in a male Master, female slave/sub marriage) to HIS complete control and power over her and her agreement to that, except that HE will not control her money, her job, her relationship with her family and her relationship with her friends, unless she is being harmed by any of those.

Thoughts?



my Lord and i have been together since 1987 and married since 1990.  He has control over the money, my job and my relationships with friends.

my Lord describes it this way... i have the role of being a mother, and likewise of being a wife these are but two of the many things i do... this does not change who i am... His slave.

Knight's alandra 




moki1984 -> RE: tying the knot -- bondage marriage (2/27/2007 9:47:50 PM)

i am a married woman and although my husband is not in the lifestyle just yet I am hoping after some exposure to the scene and gaining knowledge we can venture into a 24/7 master/slave husband/wife marriage. i believe with a marriage it takes on certain difference's but can be very rewarding if both want it




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