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TreSwank -> The Lying Game (1/24/2007 3:56:42 PM)
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My good friend Phil and I would hang out more............but, unfortunately, he tells the Swankster on a pretty regular basis that "Hanging out with you makes me do stupid shit."
I've always been under the impression that one's youth SHOULD BE the time to do as much stupid shit as possible.........so you don't regret it when you get older.
The other day, in celebration of Philip's 22 birthday, we went out to a high-class titty bar. There's always a few strippers in every bunch that try to have a quick "Get to know you" session before soliciting a lap-dance, which I found to be the perfect opportunity to invent THE LYING GAME.
I saw the little hottie coming to talk to us with that dollar-sign gleam in her eyes, so I leaned over and whispered to Phil, "Just go along with everything I saw and act natural If she asks you specific questions, just beat around the bush. Trust me.........this is going to be funny" I didn't really know at the time how well it would work out for him.
Before she sat down, I had taken "Alexis" her by the hand, and led her up to the closed off lap-dance area, promptly put down twenty bucks (default cost for most lap-dances across America, apparently) We had a good little chit-chat, and to make a long story short, I told her I was trying to show Philip the best birthday ever, because he'd been diagnosed with an incurable brain tumor that would probably kill him within two years. I managed not to crack a smile, and for a moment, projected this gravitas so well, that I thought "Alexis" would start crying on the spot.
After our dance was over, she literally GRABBED Philip from the side of the stage, and took him into the V.I.P room. A little bit later, Phil told me that the gal had given him a free lap dance AND half-a-handjob (no ejaculation). He asked me what I had told her, and when I let the cat out of the bag, Phil almost collapsed into a laughing heap.
That's when our newly birthed "Lying Game" took form. We've only been doing it for a few days at work (yes, we are coworkers), but the results have been nothing short of hilarious. Telling non-malicious lies for the pure sake of the lie itself is fucking awesome.
Maybe we'll get to hang out more, and see where else the Lying Game gets us.
***Edited to add: I'm surprised that they put some of the nicest titty bars in the middle of nowhere..........but, then again, for the high-profile types, that might be a good thing. This place was in the middle of the fucking backwoods!!!!
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