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what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/26/2007 8:35:06 PM

thaimeeuppppp

Posts: 58
Joined: 1/20/2007
Status: offline

Although I am sub I really have never liked all the BDSM costumes that seem to be so much a part of it. I mean I like whipes and handcuffs as much as the next deviant but I am more attacted to people in their regular clothes. The black leather and criss cross straps lend too much of a sameness. Just wondering if anyone else felt that way.

Post #: 1

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/26/2007 8:37:54 PM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

The answer to the question "Does anyone else...?" is always Yes.

Yes, I rarely ever wear black to a bdsm event, and generally only wear leather if it's specifically a "leather event."

I'm much more into ballgowns, satin robes, frilly girl dresses, and costumes.

I also adore formal wear like suits and tuxes (well-fitted, they make both men and women really hot to me.)

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to thaimeeuppppp)

Post #: 2

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/26/2007 8:40:06 PM

szobras

Posts: 435
Joined: 9/18/2006
Status: offline

Without knowing the nature of your agreement with your Dom/Domme,master, if your involved, or whatever the acceptable term is:
I say, whatever your personal taste , as long as it is acceptable to YOUR BDSM.

(in reply to thaimeeuppppp)

Post #: 3

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/26/2007 8:55:55 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

I prefer men in street clothes, although my Daddy looks real nice in his leather pants. Leather vests are important for people that throw whips from what I have read, so it is not all about appearance, but function.

I think females with nice figures look very sexy in fetish clothing, even though I am straight, I can appreciate the drama and appeal of it.

But mostly, I share your opinion

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to thaimeeuppppp)

Post #: 4

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/26/2007 9:16:52 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thaimeeuppppp

Although I am sub I really have never liked all the BDSM costumes that seem to be so much a part of it. I mean I like whipes and handcuffs as much as the next deviant but I am more attacted to people in their regular clothes. The black leather and criss cross straps lend too much of a sameness. Just wondering if anyone else felt that way.

Plenty of people have a Levi fetish, a suit fetish, a costume fetish or a period clothing fetish. Many Ms couples aren't leather at all. What do you want to wear?

Master Fire

_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
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BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to thaimeeuppppp)

Post #: 5

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/26/2007 9:26:05 PM

Noah

Posts: 1660
Joined: 7/5/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thaimeeuppppp

Although I am sub I really have never liked all the BDSM costumes that seem to be so much a part of it. I mean I like whipes and handcuffs as much as the next deviant but I am more attacted to people in their regular clothes. The black leather and criss cross straps lend too much of a sameness. Just wondering if anyone else felt that way.

Yes!

I find none of BDSM's sartorial/visual design clichés attractive, let alone compelling. The blackredpurple, the leather and rubber, the "dungeon" motif, the goth stuff, etc. I'm ever so pleased for those who get off on this stuff but, well, so as not to give offense I won't go on about the way it all strikes me.

May a thousand flowers bloom--preferably in more than three colors.

(in reply to thaimeeuppppp)

Post #: 6

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/26/2007 9:35:10 PM

Lynae78

Posts: 66
Joined: 8/15/2006
Status: offline

Personally I love leather and the colors black purple and red. However I would like to see other colors even if it is different colored leather. Hmm. A yellow leather mini dress would be really cute. and matching boots? ooo. As for what I like to see people wear? just about anything as long as they look confident in it. If a good looking guy doesn't look confident in a tux or vice versa a pair of jeans, then I won't be attracted to him.

(in reply to Noah)

Post #: 7

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/26/2007 10:25:43 PM

julietsierra

Posts: 1841
Joined: 9/26/2004
Status: offline

I find it difficult to dress for fetish events. The only words I have for my style of dress is "elegant slut." This does not mean those cheap dresses that come up if you google "sexy dresses." Rather it means sexy, understated, feminine, and reasonably well made. I can combine corsets with them (if you're large breasted, corsets are really your only way to go if you want strapless) but those have gotten to be so common that I'm reluctant to wear them. "Elegant slut" also doesn't mean just a nice cocktail dress. It's got to be more than that - and less than that.

Maybe one of these days, I'll get around to finding someone who will sew what's in my head and make a fortune.

juliet

(in reply to Lynae78)

Post #: 8

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/27/2007 2:42:44 AM

gypsygrl

Posts: 1471
Joined: 10/8/2005
From: new york state
Status: offline

I love the way leather smells and feels, but I've never really worn it, mostly because its not the sort of thing I would spend money on. I like dark colors, and when I clean up, I usually wear black. I've never gotten the sense that bdsm chic was a requirement, at least not at the events I've attended. Maybe at a fancy club, its more the thing to do. I've always worn stuff I found at thrift stores and my favorite 'goin' out' out fit cost about 5$. I dunno. I wouldn't worry about it if I were you. Just go with your creativity and imagination.

(in reply to thaimeeuppppp)

Post #: 9

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/27/2007 4:03:45 AM

kyraofMists

Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

We love to dress up. When we go to events it is our chance to dress out of the ordinary for us. Alandra and I are most often dressed very similarly to compliment him. Of course using the word "dressed" for mine and alandra's attire at the last event would be overstating things a bit.

He had just bought us thigh length leather coats and we wore them with only our black leather bra, thong and garter belt, black stocking and black boots. The leather coats came off after we got in the building.

Our ourfits range from formal wear (him in a tux and alandra and I in semi-formal dresses) to just lingerie. I am looking forward to Luper next month; elegance is the word that comes to mind with our outfits.

Knight's kyra

_____________________________

"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to thaimeeuppppp)

Post #: 10

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/27/2007 4:19:39 AM

eyesopened

Posts: 2798
Joined: 6/12/2006
From: Tampa, FL
Status: offline

i'm most attracted to Men whose normal street clothes are mainly leather and denim.

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(in reply to kyraofMists)

Post #: 11

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/27/2007 4:33:02 AM

ExSteelAgain

Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline

Black nylon T-shirts now and then are about it for me. I would feel silly in leather pants although I'm sure many are used to them. I have seen some dressed fully in BDSM motiff that looked pretty cool though. An individual thing.

_____________________________

You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

(in reply to eyesopened)

Post #: 12

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/27/2007 5:51:46 AM

Manawyddan

Posts: 701
Joined: 1/2/2005
From: Petaluma (Northern California)
Status: offline

Try attending a munch rather than a club ... half the folks there will be wearing plaid shirts and chinos.

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(Valerie Solonas, as described by her mother)
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(in reply to ExSteelAgain)

Post #: 13

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/27/2007 5:57:13 AM

HighonLife

Posts: 4
Joined: 10/13/2006
Status: offline

I own a couple of black shirts and black dockers and can count on one hand the number of times I've worn them together. I wear whatever I feel like at the time. While I really enjoy the feel and smell of leather, I'm simply not a leather wearing person.

Particularly when it comes to an "event", I gauge my style of dress according to the formality of the event. I dress as casually as the occasion permits with comfort being the primary objective.

(in reply to thaimeeuppppp)

Post #: 14

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/27/2007 6:06:24 AM

HerEmeraldEyes

Posts: 51
Joined: 7/26/2006
From: Joliet, IL
Status: offline

I get very torn with this situation. I LOVE black and as a "grown up goth" any excuse to get back into my old goth clothes feels like home. Personally I'm not an elegant slut (although Juliet I LOVE that phrase!!!) I'm just a downright slut! LOL short micro minis and knee high boots are my fav just to go shopping at the local mall (got thrown out of a walmart once in a skirt I bought FROM them LOL)

As a pro domme, I find that when I go to BDSM functions I'm expected to wear the "cliche" of vinyl, rubber, pvc and as much skimp as possible. As one who also lives as both a 24/7 slave and a mistress, I prefer either "elegant gothic" (victorian dress aka Interview with a Vampire) or jeans and a t-shirt with some kind of raunchy statement (Whats a bad girl like me doing in a place like this)

My Master Jimej6 is a victorian vampiric goth. He looks like Elrond (from Lord of the Rings) dressed up in Vamipre Lestat's favorite outfit. Even when he's at leisure he's in dress pants and white, frilled shirts. I must say that it is incredibly sexy to me to see men dressed that way. But then again, I think just about anything with long hair is sexy LOL

Lady Emerald
(edited for mega spelling errors)

< Message edited by HerEmeraldEyes -- 1/27/2007 6:07:49 AM >

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Unknown Author "Being happy doesn't mean everything is perfect. It means you have decided to look beyond the imperfections."

(in reply to HighonLife)

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RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/27/2007 6:14:03 AM

jimej6

Posts: 34
Joined: 1/21/2006
Status: offline

Don't let Emerald fool you. She spends most of her time wearing nothing at all! (Elrond!?!?!? Go get your paddle!)

Master Pendragon

< Message edited by jimej6 -- 1/27/2007 6:16:55 AM >

(in reply to HerEmeraldEyes)

Post #: 16

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/27/2007 6:26:36 AM

mp072004

Posts: 381
Joined: 12/22/2005
Status: offline

Going to "fetish nights" at clubs might be a problem if you can't find anything that qualifies as fetish (no uniforms? no Levi? no period "costume"?). But many BDSM events don't generally have those dress codes. I generally look more attractive in "ordinary" well-cut clothes than in fetish wear, and it suits the image I want to present, so when at parties, I wear a lot of cocktail dresses and leather pants from mainstream labels. I would recommend that you put some careful thought into your dressing if you're not going to wear widely-recognized fetishy garments.

Of course, if you don't want to hang out with fellow perverts, you don't have to worry about your dress or your manners at all. I'm assuming you're asking this quesstion because you are, or want to be, involved in your local BDSM communities.

Monica

(in reply to thaimeeuppppp)

Post #: 17

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/27/2007 6:33:06 AM

sub4hire

Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

What if you don't like everything the same as someone else does? It makes you an individual. Someone who may stand out from the crowd.
Someone with self worth.

Beyond that, what should it make you? Not part of the lifestyle?

I'm not a fan of seeing someone in the same outfit over and over either. When I know they have paid a fortune for something. Have nothing else to wear so have to wear the same thing day after day.
I'd prefer they wore regular clothing.

(in reply to thaimeeuppppp)

Post #: 18

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/27/2007 6:33:43 AM

susie

Posts: 1699
Joined: 11/21/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: thaimeeuppppp

Although I am sub I really have never liked all the BDSM costumes that seem to be so much a part of it. I mean I like whipes and handcuffs as much as the next deviant but I am more attacted to people in their regular clothes. The black leather and criss cross straps lend too much of a sameness. Just wondering if anyone else felt that way.

Costumes are certainly not part of it for us. Master has leather trousers but then they are the ones he uses on him bike and not for bdsm. The only "costume" if you like that we use is my corset but that is not used for its looks but for its control. I am sure you will find that there are many people who prefer regular clothes just as there are many that like to dress in costume. There are about as many different styles and choices as there are people. The only thing that is important is what suits you and what you are happy with.

(in reply to thaimeeuppppp)

Post #: 19

RE: what if you love BDSM but dont like the usual gear? - 1/27/2007 6:38:36 AM

Poppygirl

Posts: 41
Joined: 12/19/2006
Status: offline

sometimes it just looks silly

(in reply to susie)

Post #: 20

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