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BDSM Club hopping - 2/1/2007 6:26:49 PM

unlearntbeauty

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Joined: 6/21/2006
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I belong to three bdsm groups in my area. I enjoy nothing more than being with my like-minded friends. This summer i am camping across america with a very close friend for three weeks. I was thinking it would be ultra cool to be able to drop into fellow kink clubs.

When new people attend the groups i belong to, they are always welcomed with open arms... but i have been to a function or two with other groups where i left after being there for 30 minutes and seeming to get the silent treatment. I know that one of the groups i belong to is ultra secure when it comes to the people that attend the meetings, so i foresee that as an issue... understandably. I suppose that it could also be due to the fact that im a bit of an introvert... but i do make a conscious effort to be social around new groups.

Has anyone else ever considered such a trip?

I know it COULD be amazing, meeting loads of new kinky folk and picking up on new ways of doing things.

~unlearnt

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RE: BDSM Club hopping - 2/1/2007 6:51:09 PM

kyraofMists

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The few times that we have traveled to other cities we have gone to lifestyle events. Most have been very friendly and then a few are distant. We go for our own enjoyment and not to be accepted or entertained.

One of my favorite places was Niagara Falls. It was a small private party in a home. It was the first time that I received positive feedback on our play. The group was very SM orientated and enjoyed the play rather than being put off or even scared of it.

Last fall when he and alandra traveled to Florida, we went to an event on the west coast and met a couple fellow CM members; we had a wonderful time and hope our paths will cross again in the future.

This spring we hope to travel to Chicago and St. Louis and attend Beat Me and meet a few other CM members.

It can be fun and rewarding. It is important to keep your expectations realistic. I have found that most places will be welcoming and friendly and it is a chance to see things that you might not get to see in your own community.

Knight's kyra

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RE: BDSM Club hopping - 2/1/2007 6:55:35 PM

DominaSmartass

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Joined: 1/12/2006
From: This month? Maryland
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I have lived in 4 different states in the last 5 years and have been a member of bdsm organizations in all of them at one point or another. It's true that their openness to new people can vary. The biggest obstacle you might find is with groups in locations that are not so liberal and open where they will require any new people to be accompanied by a current member. I would suggest doing your homework beforehand on places you might be stopping and sending an email to whomever is in charge there telling them that you're taking a kinky road trip and would like to visit along the way. At least that way you'll find out which ones are welcoming and which ones to not waste your time on.

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RE: BDSM Club hopping - 2/1/2007 7:08:32 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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Absolutely if I were planning a trip like that I think it would be awesome to try and hit some new clubs and groups. Would take some planning, but that's half the fun of trips for me :)

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RE: BDSM Club hopping - 2/1/2007 7:18:24 PM

unlearntbeauty

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Yay. Im so excited. I have especially high expectations for vegas. One would think they would dump wads of money into kink (even if its not sincere)

Thank you for you respsonses

~unlearnt

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RE: BDSM Club hopping - 2/1/2007 7:27:59 PM

SimplyMichael

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I would be stunned if you could find a group that wouldn't welcome a hot young chick, that is less a compliment to you than a cynical comment on the scene.

If a group has a website and someone with that email sent me an introductory letter, I would probably let anyone attend any event I was throwing.

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RE: BDSM Club hopping - 2/1/2007 7:29:46 PM

SimplyMichael

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If you get out to San Francisco, I would love to hear your thoughts. One would think that a city full of gay men and god knows what else would have fabulous play spaces and they are the most grey industrial boring places imaginable. Make sure you hit LA as Vegas has always had a flighty scene from what little I have seen.

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RE: BDSM Club hopping - 2/1/2007 7:56:46 PM

unlearntbeauty

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gee... thanks?

I wasnt trying to make a post about looks. Theres no need to post cynical comments on the scene based on my appearance... or age. I think that i represent myself as well as anyone else despite age or appearance.

(please spare me the fat/ugly/unattractive comments)

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RE: BDSM Club hopping - 2/1/2007 8:36:33 PM

peppermint

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Joined: 10/18/2005
From: Montana
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We went to a munch in Las Vegas last April while traveling from AZ to MT. From what they told us, they have to be really careful of what they do and who knows about it. Apparently "Sin City" is okay with sex and scantily clad ladies in the shows, but very down on anything that smells of SM. There are also apparently several "rival" munches in the town and they don't all like each other. Maybe i'm wrong, but this is the impression that we got.

The people at the munch, however, were nice and friendly. We were told to let them know when we come back through town and maybe they could arrange a party.

Phoenix has APEX. They have a great dungeon space. They do like you to attend orientation before attending a play party there unless you belong to an organization that has an agreement with them to accept each others' members. Tucson has Desert Dominion but i'm not sure what their requirements might be. Seattle has The Wet Spot. When i was there they held an orientation just before a play party. There are munches in most of the larger cities you will travel through. As has been suggested, it's best to make contact before you arrive to ease your way into any group.

Depending on when you are traveling, there are 2 BDSM oriented week long camping events in WA state this summer. The first is In the Woods sponsored by the Triskeli Guild in Bellingham which includes the last weekend of July. There is also The Gathering sponsored by The Wet Spot over Labor Day weekend.

We're snowbirds so we get to enjoy a variety of munches and clubs during our travels. It's always nice to meet other kink oriented people.

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RE: BDSM Club hopping - 2/4/2007 10:24:04 PM

Whiterabbit0117

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Joined: 3/15/2006
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If I'm going to be visiting an area, I usually try to find local groups and events, but even with that effort I have rarely been able to hit local scheduled events. Group events are typically once or twice a month, usually on Friday or Saturday night. Even in St. Louis with two or three active groups and at least a munch on almost every Saturday, there isn't anything during the week.

If you hope to visit "private" groups it is helpful if you have a reference from someone well known in your local community. Someone active in LLC or who presents on at least a regional basis who is known at least by reputation. If nothing else leaders of your local group. This can let the groups you hope to visit know that you are real, not a threat, and have at least some idea how to behave. This can sometimes crack that "Sorry, members only."

At public locales you may also run into the membership issue. They are dealing with local licensing and other issues by being a "private" club. Local contacts can sometimes help explain the local rules and how to play the local games.

Many locales have groups that don't get along. This isn't always apparent to outside visitors, but If someone says that there is nothing going on a particular weekend, it is often worth continuing to check for other groups having an activity during that period.

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RE: BDSM Club hopping - 2/5/2007 11:42:06 AM

PONYSEEKER