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my 1st meet - 3/6/2005 6:48:19 AM

cdreams

Posts: 17
Joined: 1/10/2005
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I'm soo excited!!! Finally my 1st meet.
I have been submissive seems my whole life, but have kept it supressed thru 20 yr marriage with very closed minded vanilla husband, who I left 3 yrs ago. I now live with my 31 yr old boyfriend (I'm 42), who I have always considered vanilla, but liked to roleplay with me because he knows my need to serve. I started exploring the lifestyle last year, but kept him seperate because I just didn't think he had Dom in him, which caused alot of conflict between us. He was very insecure, and was afraid I would choose this lifestyle over him. A Dom I was talking to suggested I bring him into my lifestyle and include him. Surprise! Seems bf has more Dom in him than I thought. We started talking to a switch couple, the husband a very experienced trainer and Dom. Tonite we meet for dinner, and possibly (fingers crossed) our 1st training session. Bf bought me a new outfit for the occassion, skirt, black lace blouse, garterbelt and black thigh hi's, but no makeup allowed. He also bought me an inexpensive black (training) collar, and a pack of rhinestones which He will add as I earn them.
Question is, I know so little of propert etiquette and protocol. When we meet, how should I act and approach Him (them)? I want to show respect, but not come off completely introverted, I have a very extroverted personality, but don't want to be obnoxious. We have all discussed limits and I feel very trusting and comfortable knowing I will be in very experienced and caring hands. I just want to make a good 1st impression. Any suggestions?
lovya all
~cdreams~

< Message edited by cdreams -- 3/6/2005 6:51:01 AM >

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RE: my 1st meet - 3/6/2005 6:57:12 AM

Jasmyn

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From: New Zealand
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Good luck :) love the rhinestone idea, its a lovely sentiment from your BF/Dom and a great training incentive tool too.

I would suggest asking one or both of the couple if there was a formal influence to the night from the onset or would this happen later as the evening progressed? If this is not an option, err of the latter until you are shown or told otherwise. Take a cue from their own demeanor etc and go from there.

Enjoy your night :)

Jasmyn

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RE: my 1st meet - 3/6/2005 7:22:26 AM

Sunriselady

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My dear first and foremost you MUST be yourself. After all this meeting is to determine if there is a connection worth expanding on, right? If you try to put on a personna of what you feel you should be, it could cause problems later on. This lifestyle is based on TRUST, and HONESTY so the very best you can be is yourself. Obviously be polite, but answer any questions honestly, ask the questions you need to. But be sure to negotiate and come to agreements on limits, can, and won't dos, before proceeding. Also don't forget safe words. Good luck

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RE: my 1st meet - 3/6/2005 8:37:22 AM

EmeraldSlave2

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Be yourself, act like you would act at any vanilla party. Ask them beforehand if they have any specific behaviors or manners you should go with.

Forget safewords, remember the condoms! Have fun!

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RE: my 1st meet - 3/6/2005 9:47:40 AM

MidnightWriter

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Congratulations! I hope it goes well.

If he's an experienced trainer, the best person to ask would be *him*. My expectations, or the expectations of anyone who will not be there are largely irrelevant. If he's aware that this is your first training, he should not take your question amiss.

I fully agree with Sunriselady and EmeraldSlave2 - no false front, no "I should do this because I think they'll expect it" - be yourself. If the experienced couple's expectations aren't comfortable for you - disappoint them. Ask them for guidance, but don't do anything that you're uncomfortable with - nobody should expect you to be untrue to yourself. As long as you're comfortable with what they ask of you, follow their lead - my lead, or someone else's lead, would probably be a "miss".

Have a great time, and let us all know how it went!

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RE: my 1st meet - 3/6/2005 5:40:15 PM

ScooterTrash

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Hard to add to the elequent suggestions so far. I would reiterate the point to simply be yourself, well mannered, but as you normally are....it what "I" would expect. Also I agree that the best place to get guidance on your behavour, would be from those would be expecting something out of your normal characteristics in the first place. Simply ask.

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RE: my 1st meet - 3/6/2005 6:55:22 PM

cdreams

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Thank you all for your advice and you were all absolutely right. I was completely myself, and W/we had a wonderful time. I laughed and was completely relaxed and comfortable by end of dinner (despite the fact Sir had me braless and blouse unbuttoned almost to my belly..lolol) . W/we then came back to our (my bf/Sir) place and had a wonderful evening. I truly felt my Trainers hand and experienced true submission like Ive never imagined. First He and His slave/wife/partner showed my BF/Sir (which I will refer to Him from now on) techniques, protocol and positions and safe spots and pleasure spots to use and whip correctly. My Trainer was very impressed with me, I took my punishment ( I was very disobdient earlier in week) and asked for more because of my guilty conscious. I earned my 1st stud on my training collar. I am very sore and sting, they laughed and said my ass and back look like a topography map..LOL. They also gave U/us our 1st set of leather wrist and ankle cuffs. I felt many different whips and floggers and paddles and clamps, each bringing me higher and higher, I am still high from the adrenaline. I have a report to write now, noone told me there was homework..grumphhh. Grabs ice pack and pillow to sit on..owwies.
thanx and lovya all
~cdreams~

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RE: my 1st meet - 3/6/2005 9:05:34 PM

proudsub

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quote:

W/we had a wonderful time

Glad it went so well.

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