RE: Doms and the ego disease

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RE: Doms and the ego disease - 2/7/2007 6:33:01 PM

MaryT

Posts: 553
Joined: 12/8/2006
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It's just like the PTA. The person most known is going to be one that is most active (and serving in some capacity) in it. Not everyone who serves does so for healthy, philathrantropic reasons. Their activity might garner some respect from folks who are grateful that they're not the ones doing the work, but that in no way limits your right to point out that it's messed up ... even if you express it as a deeply felt "FU, buddy!"

(in reply to Kinkypupper)

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RE: Doms and the ego disease - 2/7/2007 9:15:39 PM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear Kinkypupper, Ladies and Gentlemen;

In my mind's eyes I see, should there be a case of an 'leader' of a group and or organization who identifies as a Dominant, acts in a manner contrary to normal etiquette, protocol, rules of that group's expectations, I would as the one being disrespected speak in the loudest of voices. "SIR I DO NOT CONSENT! HOW MANY WAYS DO YOU NEED TO HEAR NO! LEAVE ME ALONE I'VE ASKED YOU TO LEAVE ME ALONE BEFORE! STOP TOUCHING ME I DON'T CONSENT, I DON'T LIKE IT, HOW MANY WAYS DO I NEED TO SAY GO AWAY."

Hopefully, this 'dominant' who grabs someone's behind will find out soon that he is just a horny man --not worth respect.

Now, if this chap assumes he can grab anybody's behind and grabs mind, he will find out that will be the last thing grasped, if all the Dominants meet and decide that this behavior will no longer be tolerated. Leader or not, peers need to call to attention what will not be acceptable and what will. I know if such was done in the Eagles I've been at--the offender would be lucky to leave with his life. There is no tolerance for offending behavior.

Just some thoughts.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

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RE: Doms and the ego disease - 2/8/2007 6:26:41 AM

mp072004

Posts: 381
Joined: 12/22/2005
Status: offline

Hm, it depends on what the behavior is. You should ignore general public assholery. If the person is behaving improperly with you--touching inappropriately or using overly familiar language, maybe--you can say, "Please do not touch my hair. That's incorrect." Or, "Baby? You're a bit confused--my name is Monica." Do this firmly and gracefully--be very, very polite, and very, very clear. It usually results in some foot-shuffling and sometimes, apologies.

This is, by the way, a great tactic for non-BDSM acquaintances, too.

Monica

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Post #: 23

RE: Doms and the ego disease - 2/8/2007 2:10:08 PM

daddysliloneds

Posts: 1351
Joined: 6/28/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Kinkypupper

What do you feel can or should be done in the case of a Dom who seems to feel that the idea of common courtesy to others does not seem to apply, when that 'other' is a "submissive" or "slave?

This issue is especially a concern as this particular person is one of the unofficial "leaders" in the local scene, and others do tend to follow the influence of such people.

This was not a one-time incident but is something noted on several occasions.
Its incidents like this that cause me to consider if I really want to be in the public BDSM scene.

people will only be influenced by what they deem acceptable behavor, if they are already wired decently themselves; no one is being brain-washed! if it bothers you so much, stay away from them and where they hang-out; seems it should be a no-brainer!

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Post #: 24