sub needs advise... (Full Version)

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bicuriouscouple -> sub needs advise... (3/10/2005 12:12:08 PM)

Everytime my Master and i argue, he always says it is because i am emotional. it doesnt matter what has happened. i am starting to wonder if he is just a control freak. he wants me to be there for him 24/7, which i understand, but he gets mad at me for needing to care for my kids first. what do i do? any advise will be nice....



mistoferin -> RE: sub needs advise... (3/10/2005 12:47:21 PM)

Not sure if this is what you are going to be looking for but.... You refer to him as Master and your profile states you are a Master/slave couple. So I guess I don't understand where arguing comes into play. I don't know that I can honestly say that I have ever had an argument with a man who I called Master. Being His slave means that I have given the powers of decisions over to Him, thus eliminating arguing over anything. While I may ask Him to consider my opinion on something.....arguing is just something not done.



EmeraldSlave2 -> RE: sub needs advise... (3/10/2005 1:01:20 PM)

This is a case of too many variables, not enough information.

Do you think you are too emotional? No matter what the issue is, think about whats right and not about what you feel. Is he trying to make you see a point and you're upset over feeling criticized or threatened and use your emotions as a screen to not have to deal with the point?

Or he could be just a dork who can't handle emotional issues and is a selfish prick who doesn't understand how reality fits into fantasy.

I don't have enough information to give any serious advice other than to tell you to examine what's really going on and why.



ShiftedJewel -> RE: sub needs advise... (3/10/2005 2:06:25 PM)

quote:

but he gets mad at me for needing to care for my kids first. what do i do?


Kids always come first, anyone that can't see that has issues... period.

Jewel



MadameDahlia -> RE: sub needs advise... (3/10/2005 2:18:15 PM)

Bravo ShiftedJewel.

Would you (bicuriouscouple) like to have your rugrats taken from you by the state and put into the care (or lack thereof) of another person? Because if you neglect them and anyone gets wind of it who reports you that's what will wind up happening.

You are RIGHT in putting them first. They are your responsibility first and foremost. They cannot fend for themselves. You brought them into this world - you have a duty to them.

Now if Lord High and Mighty doesn't understand this I'd advise you get out of Dodge...



onceburned -> RE: sub needs advise... (3/10/2005 4:16:52 PM)

quote:

Kids always come first, anyone that can't see that has issues... period.


Your kids have no other way of taking care of their needs - they depend on you. As EmeraldSlave2 said, there are too many variables and not enough information to offer serious advice. But I agree with MadameDahlia and ShiftedJewel - your kids are number one in priority.



nella -> RE: sub needs advise... (3/10/2005 5:26:00 PM)

When you chose to bear children to this world, you took an resposibility, when they are 18 and can fend for themself, then you are free to do as you pleese, unthil then, you are a mother, and that he must understand. But if you are not happy whit the situation, tell him that, perhaps a Master/slave realtionship is not right for you, or altleast not whit this man. And i agree whit the rest, to littel information is offerd.



LASub4Real -> RE: sub needs advise... (3/10/2005 6:56:31 PM)

Three people have already stated the importance of your children coming first... but then you knew that before you ever wrote this post. Did you wish to knbow if others in the lifestyle knew this also? The answer is yes! Take care of Your little ones above all else. Animals know this—to do less, is to be less.



Mercnbeth -> RE: sub needs advise... (3/10/2005 7:02:26 PM)

quote:

Everytime my Master and i argue


Argue? Communicate, discuss, debate and/or exchange thoughts, ideas, feelings, desires, concerns, relevant information, trivia, etc.--yes, but argue?--no. arguementative is not a stance this slave would take with Master.

quote:

he always says it is because i am emotional


are you in control of your emotions when you "argue"?

quote:

i am starting to wonder if he is just a control freak.


without knowing what you mean when you say "control freak"--where do you draw the line between an acceptable level of control and a freakish level? did you discuss with Him before you became His slave exactly what sort of control you would expect from Him with regards to your life and the lives of your kids?

quote:

he wants me to be there for him 24/7, which i understand, but he gets mad at me for needing to care for my kids first.


do you live together 24/7, or is this an "online" be-there? are the kids also His responsibility? when you say needing to care for the kids, do you mean serving your fully capable 15 year old his dinner plate before you serve Master's or cleaning that same capable 15 year old's room for him because you are a pushover and won't insist he clean up after himself instead of doing the tasks Master has assigned? maybe you are tucking the kids into bed at 8:30 after a nice bedtime story despite His demands that you be online, naked with the webcam on at 8 or perhaps you are breastfeeding a crying infant at 2 am when He wants you to be in bed with Him sucking His cock? context can be very important.

quote:

what do i do? any advise will be nice....


Considering that your original post was rather vague, it is hard to know what sort of advice to give other than to communicate your thoughts and concerns to your Master, being as specific as possible, while you are in control of your emotions.



BlkTallFullfig -> RE: sub needs advise... (3/10/2005 7:54:53 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: bicuriouscouple
Everytime my Master and i argue

If he's your master, you don't argue, you ask him to please consider your wishes and needs and desires.
quote:

He wants me to be there for him 24/7, which i understand, but he gets mad at me for needing to care for my kids first.

I can't belive you 2 didn't talk about this before getting together. What does 24/7 mean anyway for you? You had to know you could not devote yourself to anyone on a 24hour basis unless you gave over care of your children to someone else.
Your 1st priority is to keep YOUR children safe from harm (emotional and physical), than you and your masters wants/needs. M




bicuriouscouple -> RE: sub needs advise... (3/12/2005 1:57:12 PM)

i want to thank you all for your responses. First i want to say you pointed out some things that i realize i spoke wrong. like the word "argue". i mean when we have a discussion, not fight. yes, i am emotional, arnt all women?. lol. 24/7 is just that, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. and it is in real life. as for my kids part of it i understand, because my older children are old enough to do more than they do. but my youngest is still a toddler. I realize that i basically just want him to understand my point of view, and he doesnt, no matter how i word things. so i guess it is just that i hope to have many points of view, and many people to talk to. you have all been helpfull. thank you....



ARoseAndAnEye -> RE: sub needs advise... (3/12/2005 7:11:08 PM)

I agree 100%. If your Master doesn't allow you to nurture your children, He is not a Master, he is an emotional abuser.

Been there... done that.

~anna



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