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Persuasion - 2/13/2007 3:10:40 PM

RiotGirl

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Do other find that Dominants are generally very persuasive people?

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 3:14:59 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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I haven't noticed a differencein doms versus subs/switches/vanillas.

Subs/slaves might PERCEIVE a higher ratio of doms being persuasive because the doms are trying to persuade/seduce them and they are wanting to be persuaded/seduced, but I think it's a case of self-selection.

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 3:18:02 PM

RiotGirl

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well i wasnt thinking about the idea on a whole. Or versus subs/slaves/bottoms......

just about Dominants in general and how - i dunno - dominant people tend to be abit more persuasive.........

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 3:18:01 PM

DiurnalVampire

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Pursuasive, thats one way of looking at it. We are in a positon to convince someone else that they, for some reason or another, wish to give up their personal freedom and devote their lives to us. Id say that takes a fair amount of pursuasive ability. We are also working with a very receptive audience, as wel, since most submissive/slave types are lookig to be talked into just such an arrangement.

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 4:22:47 PM

OedipusRexIt

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I suspect many of us think we are more persuasive, but self-identifying as a Dom doesn't confer persuasive powers...

We should invent a persuadometer to test this question. Any ideas?

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 4:26:23 PM

lighthearted

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I would say that Master isn't necessarily more persuasive, it's just he doesn't take "no" for an answer, when others might.

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 4:30:43 PM

MasterFireMaam

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Persuasion is often an individual thing...of the person being persuaded. If you really want, or don't want, to do something, no amount of persuasion on my part will really stop you. If there's a piece of you that wants to give in, be that a negative or not, then I'll be able to do it. It's called seduction...or taming. :-)

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 4:34:29 PM

KurtKaboom

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Persuasion implies choice. A Master has no need to persuade his slave.

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 4:34:56 PM

losttreasure

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quote:

ORIGINAL: RiotGirl

Do other find that Dominants are generally very persuasive people?

I'd suggest that perhaps it is confidence. The dominants that I've met tend to be very confident in themselves. When it comes to persuading, what you are really doing is "selling" and it's said that one can sell better if they are confident in what they are selling... so maybe dominants are a bit better at selling themselves and their ideas.

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 4:42:15 PM

mstrjx

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There's more to it than simple persuasion.

I'll speak for myself, rather than the entire dominant class. That way if you think it's delusional, you'll know it's me.

In being dominant, I learned how to pay very close attention to a partner. I learned how easy it was to get into someone's head. Around that time, in this type of interaction as well as others, I learned the art of negotiation.

I also found that in vanilla situations that didn't happen before my self-discovery that I was treated differently, better, than the next guy. Again, in vanilla situations, I seem to be paid more attention than the next guy. I don't ask for any of this, nor do I wave a dominant magic wand. It all seems to emanate from my persona (like an aura, if you believe in that sort of thing). I can vouch that it didn't used to be that way.

I would say it has to do with confidence. Certainly not authority. I would rather maintain invisibility than carry the 'asshole stick'. I'm not important enough to keep a bank open after hours, but when I ran into unexpected traffic and called ahead explaining I would be two minutes later than closing, the bank was help open for me to make my deposit. In certain restaurants if I am spotted in line, my food is waiting for me prior to my ordering or else my order is made for me without consulting me. These aren't friends, just people who notice me.

Naturally this all happens in real life. In the virtual world, trying to explain all of this is like saying that I actually DO seem to read minds, and as anyone here will tell you, dominants can't read the minds of their charges.

See, I give you the delusional 'out'.

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 4:48:52 PM

adaddysgirl

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quote:

ORIGINAL: RiotGirl

Do other find that Dominants are generally very persuasive people?

Or perhaps subs are just 'more persuadable'?

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 4:54:56 PM

OedipusRexIt

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If this is a serious question, then "persuasion" between a Dom and sub, especially within an existing relationship, should be excluded. It's just not relevant.

As has been mentioned, "persuasion" implies choice (... a tip of the hat to Kurt, above).

If Master can already tell you what to do, is that persuading? I certainly don't see it that way.

On the other hand, if Master is able to persuade the Maitre D' to seat you immediately, and at the best table, then, maybe you've got something there.

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 7:18:06 PM

ownedgirlie

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To me, persuasion implies attempting to convince someone into doing or thinking something that the person would not otherwise do or think. I don't think a capable dominant needs to rely on persuation; rather on his/her own confidence in what "the right thing" may be. His/her audience can at that point either accept it or not.

As his slave, my Master doesn't need to persuade, he simply orders and I do. Upon becoming his slave, he made darn sure I came to him of my own accord, begging him to take me in fact to prove that very point. There was certainly no persuasion there.

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 7:43:49 PM

juliaoceania

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Easy answer, no

I find my Dom to be persuasive. That does not transfer to the idea that all of them are

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 9:12:32 PM

JasonF

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A word I found for it that seems to fit is manipulation.

Like mstrjx said, I also pay a lot of attention to my partner. I know how to treat her to get my desired reaction. That's why, I think, "bad doms" can cause so much badness -- they use the manipulative powers for bad reasons other than using them to 'help' their sub.

I'm not persuasive at all. I tell my sub what to do, she trusts me, and does it. There's no persusasion about it. I just make sure to ask the right questions in the right way to get what I want during the times that I don't feel like "ordering" her to do something.

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RE: Persuasion - 2/13/2007 10:06:42 PM

FukinTroll

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quote:

ORIGINAL: RiotGirl

Do other find that Dominants are generally very persuasive people?

Have you been to my house?

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RE: Persuasion - 2/14/2007 3:37:35 AM

Quivver

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In an over all sense I dont think those with Dominant personalitys are more persuasive then any other person.
Persuasion is only a reasource to gain one's wants. I suppose depending on the Dominant themselves and their
personality if it's a tool they choose to use.

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RE: Persuasion - 2/14/2007 5:08:34 AM

happypervert

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I think some people have a need to persuade and get their way, but that doesn't make them dominant in a kinky sense -- such folks could easily be submissive and topping from the bottom. But those skills are extremely useful if they enter professions such as sales, politics, or management among other things.

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RE: Persuasion - 2/14/2007 8:55:53 AM

toservez

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quote:

ORIGINAL: losttreasure

quote:

ORIGINAL: RiotGirl

Do other find that Dominants are generally very persuasive people?

I'd suggest that perhaps it is confidence. The dominants that I've met tend to be very confident in themselves. When it comes to persuading, what you are really doing is "selling" and it's said that one can sell better if they are confident in what they are selling... so maybe dominants are a bit better at selling themselves and their ideas.

I agree with this or at least that is the type of dominant that attracts me greatly. Confidence in that they are projecting belief in themselves and their ideas, actions and things of that nature which is just something that makes a person persuasive more as a byproduct then anything else and therefore I think as a slave the Master is selling himself on this high level. People who are confident in themselves and in their beliefs tend to get there way in most things in life one way or another. Not just in this life.

Yes, as a dominant what you say the sub does and does not involve persuasiveness, but I would say it does not involve a conscious persuasiveness but an unconscious atmosphere of persuasiveness.

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RE: Persuasion - 2/14/2007 9:05:09 AM

MsKatHouston

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In general? No. I think there are personality traits that make someone more persuasive as a whole and those can be found in subs, doms and switches as much as not found in them.

Persuasive to the other side? Possibly but that may be a perception issue as many subs will want to be persuaded. Many subs will also persuade you not to attempt to persuade them.

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