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meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/13/2005 7:13:32 AM   
HypnoticDoctor


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How long did you chat on line with your potential Master/Dom/Domme before deciding to meet in person?
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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/13/2005 8:27:08 AM   
slavewoman


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It was about 3 weeks. I think we might have met sooner had we lived nearer to each other and/or hadn't started talking shortly before the holidays.

(in reply to HypnoticDoctor)
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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/13/2005 2:42:15 PM   
proudsub


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Here is a recent thread on the same topic you may enjoy:

chatting before the first meet



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proudsub

"Without goals you become what you were. With goals you become what you wish." .

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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/13/2005 3:44:12 PM   
MsSilvie


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I think it depends a lot on the people involved as well as the distance. There have been folks I would feel plenty comfortable meeting after an e-mail or two, there are folks I wouldn't meet for cold hard cash.

Arrange a meeting when it seems right, there isn't really a fixed schedule.

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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/14/2005 5:33:34 AM   
subbiejenn


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I think it depends on the people involved really. Most of the time it takes time for me to trust someone enough to meet them even in public. Always trust your instincts!! If you have doubts don't plan a meeting yet.

i have chatted with some 6-8 months before meeting -- sometimes due to distance problems but there are some i have chatted with who are very close but i wont meet.

The last Man i meet was very quick -- it was amazing the trust and ease i felt with him... i wouldn't recommend meeting anyone this quick but we meet about 24 hours after we first started talking. We had talked all day on IM and neither of us could wait to meet. Things are turning out good with him *smiles* but it was like i felt it would from the very beginning.

Best of luck
~jenn~


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"Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away"

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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/14/2005 7:09:58 PM   
LeanNTall


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Sometimes things just seem to click and while I never rush into anything,I've met 2 Doms after chatting for 2 days.No pictures were exchanged,but it just felt right.

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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/15/2005 8:35:53 PM   
Lesley


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I wasn't prepared for meeting such a perfect Dom,who was sincere and had an excellent sense of humour.Three days and we met.It was very positive.Sometimes all is good.

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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/15/2005 10:31:16 PM   
BlkTallFullfig


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quote:

ORIGINAL: slavewoman
It was about 3 weeks. I think we might have met sooner had we lived nearer to each other

Glad to hear you did it quickly...
A lot of people preach taking a longer time, but I prefer to get to know someone in person. It's simply too easy to type/retype the right words.
It's much easier for me to tell what kind of a person someone is instinctively, by the way he speaks and acts around me; what comes naturally, what seems like an effort, etc.
Whenever I've met someone that I've chat/emailed with for many months, it never works, because the chemistry/connection that wasn't there, still isn't, so I don't try too hard if it doesn't feel right/safe enough to do within a short period of time.

To each his own though; if you're the take it very slow type, than by all means, email for months/years before meeting. M

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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/17/2005 10:52:09 AM   
paganpet


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my Master and I did not chat long at all before meeting. I was sort of at that point where I had met so many frogs and was so disgusted by the whole thing that my attitude was "we may as well meet and that way, if there is no chemistry, we won't be wasting each others' time". He often says we met too soon but we are still together, living together 24/7 after over a year....

I think it depends on the individuals involved but my experience has been, the longer you talk on line and on the phone, the more opportunity to get an idea in your head (a wrong idea) of who that person is. You can never really know without meeting and therefore, in my opinion, it is better to meet rather quickly - on neutral ground, a public place preferably....

brightest blessings...

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all those things that you taught me to fear... I've got them in my garden now and you're not welcome here.

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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/17/2005 11:00:03 AM   
ARoseAndAnEye


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i guess i'm the odd one here.

Master and i chatted, talked, wrote, and otherwise corresponded for almost three months before we finally met. Let me tell you.... the phone bills were absolutely AWFUL for both of us! Because of our work schedules, i would set my alarm every morning for 3:30 AM... and we'd talk on the computer till about 5 AM and then talk on the phone till about 7 AM when I had to get ready for work. That started in September, 1998.

In December He flew me to his city/state for a long weekend. It was the most special and wonderful weekend of my life. Two months later he moved back here to my city and we've been together ever since!

Fairy tales do come true!

~ anna

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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/18/2005 9:30:20 AM   
wetrope


Posts: 117
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From: GATINEAU, PQ
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Just so u know subs, its just as much a problem for dom's as for subs, meeting that is.

After floating around on another site for a couple of months, met someone fairly close to me on site, then we went to talking on messenger, until we met -- but it was only 3-4 days, from initial contact. Well the rest is history, she invited me home after dinner, had a full session and .......... wow!!! U can tell alot from just talking whether on phone or messenger, and it has worked out every time.

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Wetrope

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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/18/2005 9:32:06 AM   
terah


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I never meet a dominant from an online chat. I meet them through a personal introduction by a mutual friend. WE did chat afterwards and decided to move things forward.

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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/18/2005 11:07:30 AM   
Lesley


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I totally agree with you. I liked that he didn't ask for a picture and the conversations online were natural and spontaneous.Then when he offered to drive 9+ hours to see me and meet me over lunch,I knew it was a good sign.

"we may as well meet,and that way if there's no chemistry,we won't be wasting each other's time"

(in reply to paganpet)
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RE: meeting a potential Master/Dom/Domme - 3/18/2005 1:00:10 PM   
EmeraldSlave2


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Agreed, people should meet as soon as they can. It eliminates building false expectations, it gets the ball rolling, it asserts that you AND the other person are adults that can make good decisions and it doesn't waste time.

(in reply to Lesley)
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