|
AAkasha -> RE: submissive mentoring (3/24/2005 10:49:24 AM)
|
quote:
ORIGINAL: BeachMystress
A sub should be mentored by a sub. While a Dom/me can direct them where to look for material and hold their hand through certain things, there are issues that come up in submission that a Dominant can't really address unless they were a sub themselves at one time. In that case, I think the Dominant can help in a general sense, but still an active submissive mentor is a much better idea.
When a Dominant mentors a sub, there is too much cross over with the submissive wanting to assume the Dom/me is their Dom/me. In truth, since what most Dominants do when "mentoring" a sub is set tasks for the sub, such as reading or journals, it is a pseudo form of Domination. When I've been asked to mentor a sub, I pretty much give them a bunch of links, tell them to read them if they'd like to learn and hold their hand while I look for a submissive I trust to take over.
In my experiences, especially online, male subs don't interact very much with male subs. The idea of one mentoring another seems foreign. You might have 10 male subs in a chatroom and no one types a thing to each other, not even small talk (let alone discussions of real life issues and giving each other advice) until a femdom enters. The same is true for some bdsm parties; the subs just wait for the femdoms to arrive and all put their attention on her. It is as if a male sub does not have much to offer a male a sub.
Then there are a few subs that really break the mold and are aggressive and take initiative to talk with other subs about their experiences.
If a "mentoring service" was offered for free to any male sub who wanted to learn how to meet, court, charm, earn respect from and be dominated by a femdom I think they would sign up in droves. If they found out their "teacher" was another male sub -- well, their fantasy is out the window. They want to be taught by a woman. It's much more of a turn on.
Akasha
|
|
|
|
