|
mp072004 -> RE: What Do Women Want to Know About Men But Don't Ask? (2/19/2007 1:40:37 PM)
|
Alex,
Thanks for a good question.
On responses: I get the impression that women on dating sites like this don't send out a lot of emails--they let others contact them. *I* do this, and I'm an aggressive sort generally.
To give you an idea of where I'm coming from, I am under 45, though I'm a bit closer to house-buying and farther from college than you. I'm in Boston, dominant, bisexual, and hierarchically polyamorous.
I think it would be vital to tell about the relational structure, or structures, you would entertain. I'm sure that you wouldn't want to move in with someone right after meeting, but is living together on the menu? Do you want a fairly casual, ongoing relationship where you meet once weekly for "fun" dates like sex/play or movie-watching? If not, is that not a goal, or not an acceptable stage or option? Would you entertain an inequal-power relationship involving d/s and SM, and where emotional intimacy and romance weren't options? Would you like multiple partners, and if so, is there an organizational system that you like best? You've said that you want something "long-term," and that's helpful, but it's not quite enough. There are lots of relationships that go on for a long while and are structured very differently from one another. If you don't want to put an extensive description in your profile, you should at least be able to describe your preferred structures in emails.
A line note: your bit about "feeling without a purpose...your happiness becomes my purpose" isn't the most attractive expression. I'd suggest you cut the bit about feeling without a purpose, and express in some other way your sense that you derive satisfaction and happiness from observing that you have made others happy (if I understand you correctly).
You might also cut down the amount of things you list in your "loves" and "likes" columns.
I'd recommend that you create two additional profiles on this site: one for Alex-the-submissive, and one for Alex-the-dominant. This is because you wouldn't want to switch in a relationship. IF you are monogamous and wouldn't switch in the relationship, your switching isn't important. If you would nurture at least one relationship in which you submitted and at least one in which you dominated, it would be important to express that you would do that.
Also, develop a "hook" to your profile. An attractive quip, a pithy statement of your approach to BDSM or relationships...these are good starter lines. This is particularly important as Collarme treats the first few words of your profile as a sort of title.
And I echo the above ladies: get a new photo, preferably with better lighting and resolution. You've decided that showing your face is an acceptable risk, so you should make your image a great asset. I rather like posed photos if they are well-done, but you can do something more casual if you prefer. Early morning and late afternoon are good times for natural light, as a rule.
Monica
|
|
|
|
