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Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 8:35:15 AM

KaineD

Posts: 497
Joined: 2/14/2006
Status: offline

Hey. I consider myself a dom, though I've never owned a slave before. I was wondering if you guys consider tit slapping or face slapping harmful? When spanking or using a whip or pulling hair, do you ever accidentally use too much force? 'Cause that kind of frightens me. I'm also turned on by pushing a girls head down on my cock, but I'm afraid I'll make her throw up or something.

Post #: 1

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 8:38:09 AM

LuckyAlbatross

Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KaineD
Hey. I consider myself a dom, though I've never owned a slave before. I was wondering if you guys consider tit slapping or face slapping harmful? When spanking or using a whip or pulling hair, do you ever accidentally use too much force? 'Cause that kind of frightens me. I'm also turned on by pushing a girls head down on my cock, but I'm afraid I'll make her throw up or something.

Depends on the person. Just gotta find the right one for you.

_____________________________

Find stable partners, not a stable of partners.

"Sometimes my whore logic gets all fuzzy"- Californication

(in reply to KaineD)

Post #: 2

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 8:40:28 AM

SimplyMichael

Posts: 7229
Joined: 1/7/2007
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I face slap all the time, its hot. I have never broken her cheekbone but I twice broke a submissives rib by hugging her goodbye.

Accidents happen but it is VERY VERY rare to do any damage with any of the stuff we do. NOT because it is perfectly safe but because most of us are pretty sane. While you will hear online about all sorts of injuries, if you ask someone real, who actually does this, you will rarely hear of any injury.

I love gagging a woman on my cock but yes, if you aren't careful you could end up with a lap full of vomit. They really hate licking it up too.

(in reply to KaineD)

Post #: 3

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 8:40:45 AM

KaineD

Posts: 497
Joined: 2/14/2006
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Right. Thanks. I do hope one day I will find a girl who feels comfortable doing the stuff I'm turned on by, and vise versa.

Where can I ask on these boards about... dating advice? There are no girls on this website in my country. Whats the best way to meet girls my age that are into what I'm into?

(in reply to LuckyAlbatross)

Post #: 4

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 8:46:20 AM

KaineD

Posts: 497
Joined: 2/14/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: SimplyMichael

I face slap all the time, its hot. I have never broken her cheekbone but I twice broke a submissives rib by hugging her goodbye.

Accidents happen but it is VERY VERY rare to do any damage with any of the stuff we do. NOT because it is perfectly safe but because most of us are pretty sane. While you will hear online about all sorts of injuries, if you ask someone real, who actually does this, you will rarely hear of any injury.

I love gagging a woman on my cock but yes, if you aren't careful you could end up with a lap full of vomit. They really hate licking it up too.

Hahaha, thanks. Thats reassuring. I'm sure I won't bust a girls nose open if I go to slap her in the bedroom. And I'll try not to make a girl throw up when I have my cock in her throat. Though, having her lick it up, as gross as it is, sort of kinda turns me on.

(in reply to SimplyMichael)

Post #: 5

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 9:01:29 AM

toservez

Posts: 1733
Joined: 9/7/2006
From: All over now in Minnesota
Status: offline

Everything you describe is done and I am sure some will echo in but while face slapping can be a limit to some all things are practiced and some things are widely liked by most submissives.

Accidents happen and not just with newbies, but being smart and going slow can hopefully eliminate most risk and limit anything bad to the minor area. Get to know yourself and ask questions to the people you are with and study their reactions. The fact that you are concern is a great sign that you will be good in this area.

_____________________________

I am sorry I do not fit Webster's defintion of a slave but thankfully my Master is not Webster.

"Anything that contradicts experience and logic should be abandoned." - H.H. The 14th Dalai Lama

(in reply to KaineD)

Post #: 6

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 9:01:40 AM

MrrPete

Posts: 614
Joined: 11/7/2005
Status: offline

Dating advice

Change your profile. If you want to find someone who likes what youd then DON"t say
your not looking.

Just look in the UK in general and you'll find lot of subs. Afterall it's not like you're
several thousand miles away.

Discuss what you want to do before you do it. A lot of don't like face slapping and humiliation. You should know that before playing with them.

_____________________________

Awrabest,

Mr. Pete

Boycott Citgo

(in reply to KaineD)

Post #: 7

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 9:20:18 AM

KaineD

Posts: 497
Joined: 2/14/2006
Status: offline

I see what you mean. All that "i love humiliating and playrape" stuff is probably coming on too strong.

I'd still prefer to find a girl in Northern Ireland, rather than have to get a boat across to England or Scotland to see a girl for just one weekend. I want a nice steady relationship.

(in reply to MrrPete)

Post #: 8

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 9:32:12 AM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

For me, harmful equals something that damages someone, physically or emotionally, that it will require a lot of time to recover from or which permenantly changes their body or mind in a way that makes them less capable of using it.

I make a promise when I train someone and again when I own someone that I will never harm them on purpose.

Sometimes accidents happen but usually if we are careful the harm from these is minor and the time required to recover and to regain capability is short. I think a good person would then stick by and help with recovery.

"Less capable" may be in the minds of the person involved. I prefer to think long term and to realize that I might not always be around or we might not always be together. Therefore I need to help my slave or sub become the best they can be and not do anything to harm their ability to care for him/herself should a time come when we aren't together.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to KaineD)

Post #: 9

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 9:39:58 AM

AquaticSub

Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KaineD

Hey. I consider myself a dom, though I've never owned a slave before. I was wondering if you guys consider tit slapping or face slapping harmful?

Depends on how hard you slap.

quote:

When spanking or using a whip or pulling hair, do you ever accidentally use too much force? 'Cause that kind of frightens me.

Instruct your girl to tell you when too much force is being applied. Either you will begin to learn, or you will learn that you should work with mind fucks and not force.

quote:

I'm also turned on by pushing a girls head down on my cock, but I'm afraid I'll make her throw up or something.

It happens. Valyraen also likes this. Kinda breaks the mood but you laugh it off, clean up and go back to playing.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to KaineD)

Post #: 10

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 9:42:28 AM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KaineD

Hey. I consider myself a dom, though I've never owned a slave before. I was wondering if you guys consider tit slapping or face slapping harmful? When spanking or using a whip or pulling hair, do you ever accidentally use too much force? 'Cause that kind of frightens me. I'm also turned on by pushing a girls head down on my cock, but I'm afraid I'll make her throw up or something.

This is standard in how we make love...lol. It is not at all harmful and I would just call it foreplay. He has never harmed me during play. I would think that one should find the tolerance of their victim, erm I mean partner, because just hauling off and slapping them across the face could cause a lot of problems like uncosciousness, popping an ear drum, or dislocating a jaw.. there are ways to do it more safely than others, and in fact you could hurt someone badly by doing it incorrectly. But there are risks in leaving bruises on people too, so the best thing is start slowly in your sadism.

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 2/23/2007 9:43:34 AM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

(in reply to KaineD)

Post #: 11

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 10:07:23 AM

sleazybutterfly

Posts: 2801
Joined: 5/15/2006
Status: offline

Accidents can happen to anyone, so I suppose anything can be harmful at some point.

I love face slapping very much, but just because I enjoy it doesn't mean that care doesn't have to be taken. We had a bit of an accident the other night. My Master slapped me, but it was a bit dark and we were doing a forced type of scene. When he did, I saw this big flash of light and my eye started to swell a bit. It turned out it was okay, but it was very scary and it hurt for a couple of days. My poor Master felt like crap for hurting me that way, but it goes to show that no matter how careful you are and how much you don't want to do something wrong, it can happen.

As long as you are sane in your actions and there is open communication between you, most of the time things will be okay. Just realize that anytime you start causing pain to someone else, or take swings at their body...things can go wrong, be prepared to deal with that and do what you can to prevent it.

_____________________________

~Flutterby
~Curvylicious
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, she became a butterfly.
Life is not a popularity contest, it's better to be hated for what you believe, than loved for a lie.

(in reply to KaineD)

Post #: 12

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 10:28:29 AM

GeekyGirl

Posts: 905
Joined: 8/21/2006
Status: offline

Face slapping is pretty safe (and many subs like it...I happen to adore it..) but do be careful about bruising. It's hard to explain away a bruise on the face.

The gagging during oral has happened to me on numerous occasions (sometimes it was done on purpose and other times it was an accident.) It's not as bad as you think. Just clean up and go on!

(in reply to sleazybutterfly)

Post #: 13

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 10:37:09 AM

Mercnbeth

Posts: 11766
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KaineD
...I was wondering if you guys consider tit slapping or face slapping harmful?...

as someone who was trained for 10 years as a wee one to take face-slapping as a form of corrective punishment without showing emotion, flinching, crying or reacting in any sort of way, the first time anyone slapped this slave's face during sex it sent her into a mental backflip and complete arousal shutdown.

this slave has since accepted face-slapping as something she participates in for the pleasure of Master, however, it is a mental exercise and (just in case defiantbadgirl, et al is reading this too) this slave likens it to participating in a lesbian act in front of Master for His pleasure; this slave has never sought it out and the only pleasure it would bring this slave is knowing it is pleasing to Him.

(in reply to KaineD)

Post #: 14

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 10:40:49 AM

SusanofO

Posts: 5672
Joined: 12/19/2005
Status: offline

Gosh it's so subjective - ask the submissive or slave in question. Personally, I hate face-slapping. But I also like stuff that could be considered a whole lot more brutal or dangerous, so it's a personal quirk, it doesn't mean it's "harmful" (to everyone). I just don't like it.

You gotta ask the individual you're going to do it to - because there is "physically harmful", and then there is also "emotionally harmful" to consider (and they're not always exclusive or tied together, either), IMO.

- Susan

< Message edited by SusanofO -- 2/23/2007 10:44:05 AM >

_____________________________

"Hope is the thing with feathers,
That perches in the soul,
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all". - Emily Dickinson

(in reply to KaineD)

Post #: 15

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 10:48:00 AM

BOUNTYHUNTER

Posts: 9259
Joined: 2/5/2004
Status: offline

Face slapping and tit whipping is done by most,Just take care and learn as you go...ONE subbie on here made fun of my clothes pins in my profile pic and said "whoo what a sadists''I explained to her that we have about 2000 of them each one painted a glow in the dark color by a devote sub/slave and when about 400 0r 500 hundren of them on her body then I turn out the lights and taken them off one at a time with my single tail" then she would say damm what a sadist smile...Just my two cents....BH

_____________________________

US going to hell in a hand basket/

(in reply to SusanofO)

Post #: 16

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 11:49:12 AM

BDSM05478

Posts: 417
Joined: 10/27/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sleazybutterfly

When he did, I saw this big flash of light and my eye started to swell a bit.

And just to put this in perspective: Some of us are more than ok after a situation like this and would not consider it anything to stop, slow down or even think about afterwards; except maybe to savor that twing of pain over the following days.

_____________________________

"It's a fool that looks for logic in the chambers of the human heart" U.E. McGill

"Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present." - Marcus Aurelius

(in reply to sleazybutterfly)

Post #: 17

RE: Whats harmful and whats not? - 2/23/2007 12:08:22 PM

sleazybutterfly

Posts: 2801
Joined: 5/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BDSM05478

quote:

ORIGINAL: sleazybutterfly

When he did, I saw this big flash of light and my eye started to swell a bit.

And just to put this in perspective: Some of us are more than ok after a situation like this and would not consider it anything to stop, slow down or even think about afterwards; except maybe to savor that twing of pain over the following days.

Did I ever say we stopped???

_____________________________

~Flutterby
~Curvylicious
Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, she became a butterfly.
Life is not a popularity contest, it's better to be hated for what you believe, than loved for a lie.

(in reply to BDSM05478)

Post #: 18

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