Marc2b
Posts: 6660
Joined: 8/7/2006
Status: offline
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Something like this had no doubt appeared on these boards before but I found this amusing:
Translating Women’s Personal ads
30ish – I’m 49
Athletic – I’m flat chested.
Natural Beauty – I’m ugly.
Emotionally Secure – I’m on medication.
Feminist – I’m fat.
New-Age – I don’t shave my arm pits.
Old-fashioned – I don’t give blow jobs.
Open-minded – I’m desperate.
Looks don’t matter to me – I’m really desperate.
Looking for my soul mate – I’m a stalker with several restraining orders against me.
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Translating men’s personal ads
Muscular – I have a small penis.
Financially secure – I have a very small penis.
Drives a Porsche – You’ll need a microscope to see my penis.
Free spirit – I can’t hold down a job.
Sensitive – I want to get in your pants.
Outgoing – I want to get in your pants.
Believes trust is important to any relationship – I want to get in your pants.
Looking for friendship only – I’m willing to wait three dates before getting in your pants.
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Do you know what the most awesome thing about being an Atheist is? You're not required to hate anybody!
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Translating Personal Ads - 
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