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first fetish event.. - 2/24/2007 7:49:45 PM

moki1984

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I am new to this and the scene in general. I am going to my first fetish ball in april and not sure what to expect...to make me more nervous I am going alone lol. Is their anything in paticular i should expect or watch out for haha. I am also wondering in your experiences with these...people who are not collared and have no dom over them...ie me...do they sometimes still get put to the whipping posts or anything else of that nature at the parties? I undersatnd of course those are all vuluntary..but I dont know if the typical dom refuses to do those things unless the person submits fully.

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RE: first fetish event.. - 2/24/2007 7:57:41 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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RE: first fetish event.. - 2/24/2007 9:36:04 PM

moki1984

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if i were to play with fire and my distance was too close am i in "danger" of being pulled in lol. i say danger because at the time i could think of no other word ...
to be completely honest i think i am partially hoping i get a lil too close........

< Message edited by moki1984 -- 2/24/2007 9:39:43 PM >

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RE: first fetish event.. - 2/24/2007 11:39:35 PM

LuckyAlbatross

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The important issue here is- does your husband know where you're going and/or is he attending with you?

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RE: first fetish event.. - 2/25/2007 3:18:39 AM

BeachMystress

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Fetish balls do not always include play stations or open playtime. The main part of a fetish ball is the costuming. People go there to see and be seen in their fun and outrageous outfits. Some fetish balls include demos, performance art and/or play stations. Find out (by reading the website or sending an email to the ball organizers) what to expect at this one.

In any case, you do need to read up on the etiquette before you go. Here are a couple of links on it from respected sites.
http://www.iron-rose.com/IR/docs/etiq.htm
http://fetishexchange.org/protocol-and-etiquette.shtml
http://www.steel-door.com/dungeon_etiquette.htm

If you remember nothing else from those links when you go, keep in mind a few things.

Hands off! Do not touch other's stuff. That includes toys and subs. Many people will become irate if you handle their toys (inanimate or human) without asking first.

Submissives do not belong to the world! Just because someone identifies as a submissive doesn't mean they've agreed to submit to you. Treat everyone with basic respect.

No loud talking near a scene! Even whispering can be a faux pas if it disturbs the scene. When you are being a distraction, you can ruin the scene for the participants and even possibly cause a concentration lapse on the Dominants part, leading to an unfortunate accident.

And yes, if there is play going on, there will be males willing to play with you. The question is, do you really want to put yourself into such a situation with someone you do not know? Just because there are people around doesn't mean that everything will be ok. You need to get to know someone before trusting them to not harm you either physically, mentally or emotionally. I think you should go with the intention of having a good time, talking with people and watching with wide eyes. Hold off play till you get a feel for the scene. Have fun!

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RE: first fetish event.. - 2/25/2007 8:54:24 PM

moki1984

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i talked to my husband first off and told him i fully understood if he said no to me going. he cant go because he is in korea...he said he had no problems with me going, to enjoy myself. i made sure he was ok with it first off. i already read up ona site abou tit...their is equipment etc. like whipping posts, a crucifixion table..etc etc...their are pieces of equipment for volunteer play and i takled to a few ppl in my area who have went to past ones (this is an annual thing) and they said their is some playing etc going on their, theirs also some stuff on stage, a fashion show off in a seperate room which im hoping i can find some custom designers in their hehe. i am going alone which might be interesting

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RE: first fetish event.. - 2/25/2007 9:06:36 PM

SilverShadows

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People have posted good links and some of the common rules already. I think the one big difference I've seen between fetish events and other public events is that you keep your hands off of other people unless you have permission. That includes people putting hands on you. At least locally you ask before even giving a hug. If you’re a reasonable person the general answer, "Any time you want, no need to ask" or "You will have to ask my Master/Mistress." We are very hands on people but only with clear consent.

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RE: first fetish event.. - 2/25/2007 9:18:29 PM

SweetAndInnocent

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BeachMystress

And yes, if there is play going on, there will be males willing to play with you. The question is, do you really want to put yourself into such a situation with someone you do not know? Just because there are people around doesn't mean that everything will be ok. You need to get to know someone before trusting them to not harm you either physically, mentally or emotionally. I think you should go with the intention of having a good time, talking with people and watching with wide eyes. Hold off play till you get a feel for the scene. Have fun!

I couldn't agree with this statement more. When I do the orientations for our new members in our local group, one piece of advice we always offer is WAIT. Although you will see things that "turn you on" in ways you never imagined, take a step back and WAIT. You need to be in the atmosphere and take time to get to know yourself as well as the Dominants before jumping into play.

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RE: first fetish event.. - 2/26/2007 3:08:22 PM

moki1984

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i undersatnd what your saying about wait. god forbid i jump in too fast and get a bad experience which is very possible if they do not know what i like/dislike

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