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mp072004 -> RE: Have other Mistesses dominated a male Dom? (3/1/2007 3:47:32 PM)
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I've played with men who were top- and dominant- identified, and I've turned down offers from others. Some have been recurring playmates. My reasons for turning others down had to do with personal attraction, but also with the way they approached bottoming or submitting to me. Keeping it quiet and private can be fine, but asking for discretion in a way that presents our interactions as "dirty little secrets" doesn't make a person attractive to me. Asking me to top you as relative equals, or to top you for the sake of experience bottoming, is perfectly fine--I might still turn people down who approach me that way, but not because I disliked the approach. Being attracted to me personally and wanting to bottom to me as a way we might play together is also an appealing reason to want to bottom to me.
The activities differed. For some, it was very sensation-oriented, for others, power roleplay was more significant.
You know, I'm not sure whether many of them started calling themselves switches--or submissives or bottoms, for that matter. When people give me a word like that, they usually do it as part of introducing themselves, but not usually afterward. I tend to treat power and sensation orientations as like sexuality--it doesn't matter much whether the object of my desire is bi, het, or gay, the real question is whether she'll sleep with me. I know one continues to introduce himself as a top and dominant, because that's chiefly what he likes to do, and certainly he is seeking playmates who are looking to be topped and dominated.
Monica
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