Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

The Cowboy


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> The Cowboy Page: [1]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
The Cowboy - 2/26/2007 2:12:20 PM   
MistressYlwa


Posts: 263
Joined: 8/25/2005
Status: offline
The Cowboy

A cowboy was overseeing his herd in a remote
mountainous pasture when suddenly a brand-new
BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.

The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci
shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out
the window and asks the cowboy, "If I tell you
exactly how many cows and calves you have in
your herd, will you give me a calf?"

The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie,
then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and
calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell
notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular
RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on
the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite
navigation system to get an exact fix on his
location which he then feeds to another NASA
satellite that scans the area in an
ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in
Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image
processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm
Pilot that the image has been processed and the
data stored.

He then accesses a MS-SQL database through an
ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on
his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives
a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report
on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer
and finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You
have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my
calves," says the cowboy.

He watches the young man select one of the
animals and looks on amused as the young man
stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I
can tell you exactly what your business is, will
you give me back my calf?"

The young man thinks about it for a second and
then says, "Okay, why not?"

You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government",
says the cowboy.

"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how
did you guess that?"

"No guessing required." answered the cowboy.
"You showed up here even though nobody called
you; you want to get paid for an answer I already
knew, to a question I never asked. You tried to
show me how much smarter than me you are; and
you don't know a thing about cows...this is a herd
of sheep."

"Now give me back my dog."


_____________________________

Mistress Ylwa

You see what power is - holding someone elses fear in your hand and showing it to them! - Amy Tan
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: The Cowboy - 2/27/2007 5:58:47 AM   
Bella1


Posts: 64
Joined: 2/19/2006
Status: offline
post it note to self....."No more coffee at computer while reading jokes" 

*Bella1*

(in reply to MistressYlwa)
Profile   Post #: 2
Page:   [1]
All Forums >> [Casual Banter] >> Humor and Games >> The Cowboy Page: [1]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.047