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New to the dom/ sub - 3/2/2007 4:17:05 PM

columbo68

Posts: 3
Joined: 3/2/2007
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My wife has been to this site alot and I know she is sub. We never really got into it and know I think she may be going elsewhere. I am going to take contol of the situation and hopefully she will wear my collar exclusively. Should I just play it by ear?

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RE: New to the dom/ sub - 3/2/2007 4:21:08 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
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Are you saying that your wife is an online submissive or she has a real life dom? Have you spoken with her about these feelings to determine what she wants and needs? You really should take this discussion up with her and let her know what you know. Then you can proceed

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RE: New to the dom/ sub - 3/2/2007 4:24:57 PM

untamedshysub

Posts: 220
Joined: 2/26/2005
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you sound like you are fishing ask your wife.

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RE: New to the dom/ sub - 3/2/2007 4:27:55 PM

columbo68

Posts: 3
Joined: 3/2/2007
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I know that she is an online but I have afeeling that she has taken it a little further than that. No proof just 16 years of being togeather.
She keeps the whole online thing a secret..or tries to and never really wants to talk about it. I think that she is a little ashamed and I do not want that wedge in our marrage.

(in reply to juliaoceania)

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RE: New to the dom/ sub - 3/2/2007 4:33:30 PM

juliaoceania

Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline

Well I do not think any of us can help you, talk to her about it, she is the only one with your answers

Good luck

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

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RE: New to the dom/ sub - 3/2/2007 4:54:27 PM

mstrjx

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I'm not certain what your interest or experience is in the realm of D/s or BDSM, but it is very common that when people become 'involved', that connections they make might very well be intense emotionally.

You definitely need to speak to her. But the situation might be delicate.

Jeff

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Know thyself. It's the best gift you can ever give yourself.

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RE: New to the dom/ sub - 3/2/2007 5:36:24 PM

MasterFireMaam

Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline

This is your marriage...it's not time to be passive aggressive. If you want to save it, tell her you're interested in learning more. Also tell you how hurt and angry you are at the idea of her cheating on you. Keep the conversation about your feelings, not her actions. Consider going to councelling, too.

Master Fire

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RE: New to the dom/ sub - 3/2/2007 7:01:50 PM

sub4hire

Posts: 6775
Joined: 1/1/2004
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Communication is the key to any successful relationship. Of course you should ask her. Tell her you found the site and are curious about it.
What interests her here? Tell her if you are interested. Conversate in general.

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RE: New to the dom/ sub - 3/2/2007 8:44:55 PM

petstorm

Posts: 49
Joined: 6/22/2006
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Have you thought about sending your wife an email with the link to this very thread? Seems like a great way to open the door and communicate. Or in the least, show her that you're seriously interested and you want to give her what she needs, as well as save the marriage if indeed the boat is being rocked.

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RE: New to the dom/ sub - 3/2/2007 8:56:22 PM

proudsub

Posts: 6142
Joined: 1/31/2004
From: Washington
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: columbo68

My wife has been to this site alot and I know she is sub. We never really got into it and know I think she may be going elsewhere. I am going to take contol of the situation and hopefully she will wear my collar exclusively. Should I just play it by ear?

I was in your wife's shoes and did go outside my marriage because i was afraid to discuss my bdsm interests with Hubby. When He found out we had a long talk and He forgave me and wanted to learn to be my Dom. I hope you can talk to her about this and if she has strayed i hope you can consider forgiveness, that meant so much to me. Feel free to message me on the other side if you want more details. Good luck with it.

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proudsub

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