Patience

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rollinonward05 -> Patience (3/4/2007 6:22:10 AM)
[:o]One of the many things we subs and slaves learn ( sooner or later) is patience. In many different scenarios and life in general. Do you ever feel that your patience is being tested way to far ? Or feel that you are on the verge of losing it and doing something, or saying something you know you may regret later? How was this handled by you or your Owner? I know my own patience used to be next to nil when i first came into the lifestyle years ago. But I have learned and some of the lessons have been the hardest that I had to get through my head. And sometimes it took a long long time to allow the lesson to be learned. But there are still times I find my patience getting thin and me getting antsy. That is when I attempt to keep myself busy with other things to keep my mind on something else till I can think about things more clearly. But I still can use some help or advice there. Thanks rollin

Quivver -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 6:41:28 AM)
Back in the day I was called the most impatient bitch in the world by an employer. I too have learned patience or maybe better said, "I am still learning............." I believe that patience and trust are things that go hand in hand at times. Since I admit I have trust issues I end up with patience issues also. A dear friend said one word that I process daily that helps me stay on track. That word is ~ Believe ~ and the focus I get from it priceless.

sub4hire -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 7:13:33 AM)
I have near zero patience in my life. Never have and more than likely never will. Must we learn patience? I think it is how we choose our partners. I've had two within the scene in the last 20 years and no, never much had to learn patience yet. However, I do have patience for certain aspects of life just not a lot in general. The only advice I can offer you is the advice you've already given yourself. Try to busy your mind on other ideas while waiting.

juliaoceania -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 7:28:59 AM)
quote: One of the many things we subs and slaves learn ( sooner or later) is patience. In many different scenarios and life in general. Do you ever feel that your patience is being tested way to far ? Or feel that you are on the verge of losing it and doing something, or saying something you know you may regret later? How was this handled by you or your Owner? I used to think I needed to learn patience. So I set out to become more patient. I was given ample situations by the universe to become more patient. In fact the more patient I was, the more the situations that required patience came my way. I no longer feel the need to be patient...I am patient, and I need nothing further to try my patience. Sometimes impatience is not a bad thing. It is rarely a good idea to be impatient with one's dominant, but it is not a bad thing to be impatient in all situations. Why should one put up with trying circumstances if it is unnecessary? There is always a balance in enduring what one must, and taking action and changing what one can. I do not much care for enduring..lol I am an energetic person and I like everything NOW at times. It annoys my Daddy when I get passenger rage (he drives and I cuss at slow cars and jerks[:D]). He gets annoyed with me when I start bouncing around wanting to get everything done yesterday, he often tells me to slow down... in these ways I have become more patient with life I suppose.. but I still need reminding at times. I am learning to take my time and not rush.

innatedesire -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 8:38:46 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rollinonward05 [:o]One of the many things we subs and slaves learn ( sooner or later) is patience. In many different scenarios and life in general. Do you ever feel that your patience is being tested way to far ? Or feel that you are on the verge of losing it and doing something, or saying something you know you may regret later? How was this handled by you or your Owner? I consider myself a very patient person, at times to my own detriment sigh giving those I love the support, time and patience that they need. I do not know if it is the other person that is testing me or if it is the universe in general, but regardless I am always able to learn more about myself in the process. I know my own patience used to be next to nil when i first came into the lifestyle years ago. But I have learned and some of the lessons have been the hardest that I had to get through my head. And sometimes it took a long long time to allow the lesson to be learned. But there are still times I find my patience getting thin and me getting antsy. That is when I attempt to keep myself busy with other things to keep my mind on something else till I can think about things more clearly. But I still can use some help or advice there. The only thing that helps me through trying times is to stop and look at the big picture, when I begin to get upset or frustrated I force myself to stop with the negative thinking and I try to find what it is about the situation that is getting me all antsy, what button is being pushed here and it it really worth all the angst. I wish there were a magic cure. I feel your pain my current situation is really testing my patience like no other before combined with other circumstances that decided to throw themselves into the mix and I am ready to jump out of my skin.......patience be dammed it sucks!!! Just keep plugging away and know that it is not always going to be this way, I know that it sounds blase' but what else can you do.

petstorm -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 11:16:28 AM)
i think we all lose our patience from time to time... even those who have been submissives/slaves for 50 years and then some. It's human nature. We can all be pushed too far. Even things like stress, worry, kids running rampid, parents putting pressure on you, etc can wear us thin when normally we could maintain our composure. What happens when i lose mine? Well, that depends on how it's released. If it's directed at Master, i pay the consequences of it later. chuckle But otherwise, Master usually tells me in a very commanding tone to find my corner and THINK about what i'm saying or doing. Afterwards, i can talk to him and calmly vent. It helps, and usually puts things back into their right perspective.

DiurnalVampire -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 11:21:58 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: rollinonward05 Do you ever feel that your patience is being tested way to far ? Or feel that you are on the verge of losing it and doing something, or saying something you know you may regret later? How was this handled by you or your Owner? Angel and I feel our patience is being tested on a daily basis lately. We are living 15 minutes from one another and becasue of his demanding school schedule we are lucky if we manage to have dinner together once or twice a week. We have not been alone since the week after I moved down initially. When we have been together, he has lost it once or twice. Having gone from long distance to realtime, I do not pick up on his nonverbal cues wel yet, and likewise he doesnt get mine. We both miss a lot of one anotehr prods at moving something along, however I will just actively do something about it. He wont. Until his patience at hinting wears thin and then he'll say something, sometimes itll get the point across. We are learning to deal with one another, and as the face to face learning gets better, the patience issues get fewer. Granted it is going to be a long couple of months when we have to steal time between homeowrk, work and classes to spend time together, but he is worth the wait. It is a hard lesson to learn, but unfortunately there are priorities in our life that cannot be rearanged. I will not come before school, and I have to live with that decision. DV

BRNaughtyAngel -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 11:51:41 AM)
My patience is being tested constantly in our relationship for a variety of reasons I won't go into here. But because I feel what we have can grow into something pretty amazing, I work overtime in trying not to be so impatient. I do respectfully vent about my frustrations in my journals. I get impatient about some things in life not related to my relationship, but I think that happens to most of us. Lately I've been impatient about not being able to do things I'd like because I'm recovering from major surgery. I did do something yesterday I shouldn't have and when my Master found about it, He was not pleased and asked if I wanted to be punished when I'm better for not following His orders (which were to follow doctors orders). Obviously I don't want to be punished, so I'll be working on my patience even harder in this area. [&o]

ToServeIsToLive -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 12:13:02 PM)
I've always had an immense amount of patience, but it's not good to have too much either. It can leave people feeling like you don't have much enthusiasm for things.

gypsygrl -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 2:02:13 PM)
I've come to the conclusion that, in general, I have too much patience. I think its a wrong headed assumption that "subs need to learn patience" because it assumes that there's some characteristic (impatience) that all submissives share beyond the fact that they submit. I don't really need to learn patience. No one has ever commented on the fact that I'm impatient. In fact, if someone comments on anything like that its to say how patient I am. To me, "infinite patience" is simply another way of saying "resignation." But, I do suspect there have been times when people have "tested" my patience. Generally, when they find that limit, they're looking at my butt as I'm walking out the door. That having been said, there are times when the rest of the world isn't moving on my schedule. Everyone is on their own timetable, and sometimes the ability to wait for what you want is a virtue. I can put myself in a trance really easy and its a nice way to pass the time. I also knit. Cleaning or other housework helps. For me, the trick is to do something to empty my mind so I'm not thinking about what I'm waiting for.

julietsierra -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 3:14:33 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: gypsygrl To me, "infinite patience" is simply another way of saying "resignation." But, I do suspect there have been times when people have "tested" my patience. Generally, when they find that limit, they're looking at my butt as I'm walking out the door. While I don't necessarily agree with you that patience is another way of saying resignation, I believe you've said everything else exactly right gypsygrl - at least from my perspective. I can wait a long long long time for things. It doesn't mean I should though. The longer I wait, the more I can see that I can live without it and the more I can see that, the less I need what I'm being patient about. My contention is that someone someday just might "out patience me and when I get tired of waiting; when I see that I'm not missing anything, then walking will be easy. Fortunately though, so far, that hasn't happened to me yet. I hope it never does. juliet

littlesarbonn -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 3:27:54 PM)
We live in an ADD society. Patience is a virtue rather than a norm. I think this is why people come to these boards all angry that they've been here a whole four days and haven't connected with a life partner yet. Everyone knows a patient person will wait at least six days.

BRNaughtyAngel -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 3:50:27 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn We live in an ADD society. Patience is a virtue rather than a norm. I think this is why people come to these boards all angry that they've been here a whole four days and haven't connected with a life partner yet. Everyone knows a patient person will wait at least six days. Wha? My Collarme membership manual states very clearly it's 7 days for a lifemate; 5 days for a serious, but not likely lifelong relationship; and 3.5 hours for a quick roll in the hay before coming to the boards to file a never-heard-before complaint. [sm=lol.gif]

FukinTroll -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 3:55:56 PM)
BRN I have 4 hours to kill. Do what do I get?

BRNaughtyAngel -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 4:01:21 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: FukinTroll BRN I have 4 hours to kill. Do what do I get? Whatever ya want naughty troll. [sm=flowers.gif] [;)]

littlesarbonn -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 4:12:11 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BRNaughtyAngel quote: ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn We live in an ADD society. Patience is a virtue rather than a norm. I think this is why people come to these boards all angry that they've been here a whole four days and haven't connected with a life partner yet. Everyone knows a patient person will wait at least six days. Wha? My Collarme membership manual states very clearly it's 7 days for a lifemate; 5 days for a serious, but not likely lifelong relationship; and 3.5 hours for a quick roll in the hay before coming to the boards to file a never-heard-before complaint. [sm=lol.gif] You got a membership manual??? My only welcome was that Moderator 73 showed up at my door to "inspect" me to make sure I was really submissive. She tortured me for five days before she decided I would be allowed to post. All this time, I kept asking for a collarme membership manual, and all she did was bring over seven of her sexy friends who proceeded to continue to enslave me. Man, I sure wanted a membership manual. It's so unfair.

BRNaughtyAngel -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 4:24:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: littlesarbonn quote: ORIGINAL: BRNaughtyAngel Wha? My Collarme membership manual states very clearly it's 7 days for a lifemate; 5 days for a serious, but not likely lifelong relationship; and 3.5 hours for a quick roll in the hay before coming to the boards to file a never-heard-before complaint. [sm=lol.gif] You got a membership manual??? My only welcome was that Moderator 73 showed up at my door to "inspect" me to make sure I was really submissive. She tortured me for five days before she decided I would be allowed to post. All this time, I kept asking for a collarme membership manual, and all she did was bring over seven of her sexy friends who proceeded to continue to enslave me. Man, I sure wanted a membership manual. It's so unfair. psssssssssssttttttt [:-] leans over to whisper to sarbonn There is no Moderator 73. [sm=whoa.gif]

gypsygrl -> RE: Patience (3/4/2007 4:27:50 PM)
I didn't mean to imply that patience, in general, is the same as resignation, I meant "infinite patience" is.

andreaC -> RE: Patience (3/5/2007 3:22:10 AM)
I am far from being patient as per my Master saying, but i think i am improving with his guidance. Just dont like fooling around......im the kind of girl that likes to get to the point. I use all my patience at work!!

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