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izzybella -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 6:50:17 AM)

Sorry, but there is one thing that will quickly decide whether a 'slave' has rights or limits, and that is a thing called reality. Seems to be in short supply around here at times. I personally could not give two fucks what the 'communities ' definition of slavery is, cos for as many people as there are in this lifestyle there wil be just as many definitoons of such a thing. And if as a 'master' or dominant you think that you have some inalieable right to take someones basic human rights away then by all means give it a shot and you will be in for a very quick surprise and a date with an angry guy named bubba on the bunk below you.(and believe me he WILL take away your basic human rights)

What alot of dominants tend to forget is that the one person who really decides the level of submission is the submissive themselves, this includes a so called slave. The one thing that they all share is a right to leave a situation that is not of their choosing, anything else is just abuse and should not be tolerated. And if they choose to let people know that there are activities or situations that they will not tolerate , that just makes them more self aware and infinitely more valuable I would think. If you wish to have some mindless drone as your slave by all means enjoy.

And I will say one thing, I am certainly glad that I would never have anything to do with someone who would be so cold as to state what the joker did a couple of posts ago. You my friend need to realise that  true dominant always has the feelings and needs of their submissive foremost in their mind and if they dont then they should maybe think about growing a soul before trying to play with adults. And if this goes against your so called 'widely held definition' then im afraid you need to realise that this lifestyle like life itself is full of diverse opinions. and to try and claim that you are with some so called majority and anyone who does not share your opinion is in some minority is just so much piss and wind.


Oh and by all means let us know where exactly it was that you checked this definition of yours.....


Too many people read too many books and spend too much time on the internet that they forget that they actually live in the real world. But then again nothing beats someone who is content that they are in posession of knowledge of "the one true way"



jezzabelle -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 6:50:25 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: NControlofU

I agree with you wholeheartedly.   When I read some profile that says she is a "TPE slave" and then says, she's not bi and will only submit to X,Y & Z but not to P, Q or R, I have to wonder just what it is that she means by the word "slave" and what does she think TPE stands for, anyway. 


When did being bi become a prerequisite for being a slave? 



GeekyGirl -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 6:51:59 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: FORCEFULL11229

As a Lifestyle Dom in the life for over 25 years, it still amazes me to read the various ads from females who claim that they are slaves, but yet in thier ads they dictate what they will and wont do. How they expect the "Master" to behave.
Funny, I always thought a slave does as the Master wishes, not the other way around. I also understand that the Master always has the slaves welfare at heart, making sure that no harm befalls her.


That's the biggest load of bull I ever heard. Slaves are still human and we still have a right to choose not to be in relationships with people who will ask us to do things which are unhealthy for us  or make us unhappy.

I will not be in a relationship with someone who asks me
-to quit my career
-relocate
-abandon my family
-give up pets
-give up the hobbies about which I am passionate
-stop spending time with my life-long friends
-ask me to do anything illegal
-ask me to do anything that would affect my long term mental health or physical health

Those are my hard limits..within those limits, I can be a slave. I will not give up those limits however because I happen to have a little thing called self respect.

Sounds like what you want is a doormat with no self worth who will jump up and say "YES MASTER!" no matter what stupid, ridiculous thing you tell her to do.

Sorry, this is planet earth not "Planet BDSM fantasy." This is the real world and people have priorities, even slaves!



juliaoceania -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 6:58:36 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Dartantris

A slave has no rights. They do as they are told. There is no such thing as a slave with limits. At least the last time I checked.

Comments regarding abuse and finding your compliment are irrelevant to the question. You can have abuse in any type of relationship and it just isn't relavent to being in a Master/slave relationship. If a slave is being abused, do they stay in the relationship if they can set some hard limits? Ridiculous. Does setting limits allow you to find the perfect match? Of course not. We're talking about the widely accepted definition of a Master and slave relationship and slaves who idenitify them as such but include information in their profile that is not consistant with the widely held understanding of these relationships.

I'm not interested in a slave's limits. I don't lay out a plan with defined rules when I go into a relationship. I don't expect or condone a slave taking on a Master before the relationship has developed to the point where a slave has the information they need to have confidence in their decision. And that is entirely subjective and often unique to the relationship between the two people involved.

Obviously, anyone can define anything in any manner they choose. That doesn't make it valid or accurate. If there is a widely held definition of a Master and a slave relationship, then that is how it's understood in the community. That's how communication works. If everyone defined words differently, it would make communicating a little challenging.  If you believe otherwise about Master and slave relationship definition, you are the exception not the new widely held definition. Any group is free to make up their own rules but they don't have the authority to replace the widely accepted and established definition and should come up with a term other than Master and slave to describe their relationship. 


I wrote out a reply to you but it timed out, so now you can have the reader's digest condenscened version[:D]

Where is your community? And what is your reference for defining a slave in a One True Way? I would be really interested to learn these things, as no one else, including members of this community that have written books on the subject and spent decades doing this seem not to be defining things the way you do, so who would I rely on? Someone who wrote well regarded books, or someone who just wants to flame people on the internet because they are not a no limits slave?



NControlofU -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:00:18 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: jezzabelle

quote:

ORIGINAL: NControlofU

I agree with you wholeheartedly.   When I read some profile that says she is a "TPE slave" and then says, she's not bi and will only submit to X,Y & Z but not to P, Q or R, I have to wonder just what it is that she means by the word "slave" and what does she think TPE stands for, anyway. 


When did being bi become a prerequisite for being a slave? 


Fot this sadistic Master, Since Day ONE.   Look, it's a matter of fact that slaves choose their Master every bit as much as the Master chooses the slave.  This is, after all, CONSENSUAL, not forced, slavery.  So, of course each needs to be cautious and selective in their choices.  But, when a woman posts her profile as a TPE (Total Power Exchange) slave and then goes on to post a luandry list of things she WON'T do, whether it's wash windows or swallow cum or eat a pussy, then she is not what I would consider to be a TPE slave.  It's different if she says that she would like to be a TPE slave someday and that she has never done X, Y or Z and isn't sure how she would feel about doing it.  Then we have something to talk about and work out.  But, when she says flatly that she will not do certain things then she is not a Total Power Exchange slave.  She is a Partial Power Exchange slave, at best.  A Master looking to OWN a slave is not looking to have that slave ruined, destroyed or damaged, unless he is a sick psychopath and then anyone who comes within his grasp is at risk.  A slave is property but, it is living, breathing, feeling property and when a Master finds a slave that meets his needs, he is going to be very protective of that property.  Just be careful how you word your profiles, if you call yourself a TPE slave.




simplewhispers -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:04:34 AM)

so in general subs have limits and its ok but slaves cant have any and should not expect them ?[8|] Just trying to see exactly where I am gonna fit in ......



GeekyGirl -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:05:11 AM)

NControlofU: So you're saying you can't be TPE and be monogamous? Again, a load of bull. I could easily say, "I am TPE within the confines of monogamy". I might have NO interest in being in a TPE where other people will be brought in.



litleone8620 -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:08:12 AM)

I understand where you're coming from. It's about 'false advertisement', so to speak. And i still say a TPE, no-limits slave is highly unrealistic.

But it still seems to me that you're forgetting is that slaves are HUMAN, just like everyone else. We're allowed to have standards, and we're allowed to not engage in anything that would be harmful to us.

It might be true that the Master has his slave's best interests at heart, but how can that be if he is making her do something she doesn't want to do?



NControlofU -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:09:27 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl

NControlofU: So you're saying you can't be TPE and be monogamous? Again, a load of bull. I could easily say, "I am TPE within the confines of monogamy". I might have NO interest in being in a TPE where other people will be brought in.


That's for YOUR MASTER to decide, not the slave, if you really want a TOTAL Power Exchange, that is.  Otherwise you are a Partial Power Exchange slave because you are setting your own limits.  Be a partial power exchange slave, there isn't a thing wrong with that.  But, why bother calling it Total Power Exchange, when it isn't?



izzybella -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:10:56 AM)

And who died and made you the profile police pal?? What you do not seem to get is that this is indeed a free site. People can call themselves a TPE slave if they wish, even if they only want someone to give them a mild spanking every second tuesday. So please quit with the "do this and dont do that or else" bullshit cos it simply does not mean a bloody thing.  Because as you even said in your last post, when someone posts a laundry list of things that they will not do IN YOUR OPINION it does not make them a tpe slave. Well we all know what is said about people and opinions now dont we? Just because you lay claim to being a big bad sadistic dominant (im shaking in my babydoll at that one) does not mean that your word is absolute law. Oh and I know this might be a revolutionary concept for you guys but a tpe slave is not always a she  and a dominant is not always a he, last time I checked and im pretty sure this is something that everyone can agree on, roles in this lifestyle are far from gender based. 



BOUNTYHUNTER -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:11:32 AM)

There seems to be some thing lost in your post.WE aren't taking any thing the slave is "giving " up all rights..WE don't have time for word games around here therefore when one kneels and accepts our collar  she will  knows before hand that it is for total slavery.OF courses if you ask 100 different people you perhaps will get about 75 different answers..Any how it just this ol" masters opinion on your post..bounty



jezzabelle -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:12:00 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: NControlofU

quote:

ORIGINAL: GeekyGirl

NControlofU: So you're saying you can't be TPE and be monogamous? Again, a load of bull. I could easily say, "I am TPE within the confines of monogamy". I might have NO interest in being in a TPE where other people will be brought in.


That's for YOUR MASTER to decide, not the slave, if you really want a TOTAL Power Exchange, that is.  Otherwise you are a Partial Power Exchange slave because you are setting your own limits.  Be a partial power exchange slave, there isn't a thing wrong with that.  But, why bother calling it Total Power Exchange, when it isn't?


But what if she finds a Master that only wants a monogamous relationship as well as has the same limits as she does?  Does that make her any less of a TPE slave than another that has a Master that wants poly or wants to share her, etc?  What would you say about that Master then?  Is he not a TPE Master because he doesn't want poly or doesn't want a bi slave?



sublizzie -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:15:20 AM)

~ fast reply ~

Where is the Troll with his food cart? This is soon going to be a slave vs submissive thread or another "true, real" one.

Communication is imperative. Each person has their own definition of what they are and what they seek. You *communicate* with people who seem to have similar wants and needs. Through that communication you find that they are/are not using the same definitions you are for various things. It would be easier if everyone had the same definitions, but you probably wouldn't make as many new friends that way.

Just my thoughts....



GeekyGirl -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:17:07 AM)

Thank you Jezzabelle. I am a monogamous slave seeking a monogamous master. If he's not monogamous, he's not the master for me. I don't think it makes me any less a slave!



jezzabelle -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:19:15 AM)

You're welcome GG.  I don't think it makes you any less of a slave either [:)]



izzybella -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:20:56 AM)

I tell you what bounty, by all means tell that to a judge when your slave decides that she isnt interested anymore and you feel the need to remind her that when she knelt she agreed to total slavery. Total slavery is a very powerful statement and although you may think that what you have over someone is total domination I can assure you that it is merely a construct created in a realm of mutual suspension of reality.


oh and p.s while you are there you might wanna try and explain what the deal is with the hat too, I think a gay leatherman in san fransisco is crying that someone stole it from him.....



GeekyGirl -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:21:42 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: NControlofU

That's for YOUR MASTER to decide, not the slave, if you really want a TOTAL Power Exchange, that is.  Otherwise you are a Partial Power Exchange slave because you are setting your own limits.  Be a partial power exchange slave, there isn't a thing wrong with that.  But, why bother calling it Total Power Exchange, when it isn't?


BUZZZ!  Wrong.  It's for ME decide before I accept him as a master. It's for me to decide before I sign contracts and give him power control.

Wrong answer but please play again!



GeekyGirl -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:23:43 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: izzybella

Total slavery is a very powerful statement and although you may think that what you have over someone is total domination I can assure you that it is merely a construct created in a realm of mutual suspension of reality.


WONDERFUL way to put it. We can call this TPE all we want but we're really mutually agreeing to a fantasy that will go right out the window when reality sets in. Sure, I'm a slave..but ask me to do something illegal for example and see how quick "yes master" turns in "screw you, you psycho!"



BOUNTYHUNTER -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:23:47 AM)

THEN girl why don't you become what you wish and leave the others to make their own decisions,I can tell from your attitude that you would have a "very" difficult time with a MASTER that takes no prisoners such as myself..When one accepts a collar I am sure most have had a discussion about all the why and why fore etc.SO it comes NOT as a big surprise that  a slave has no right except those granted by his kindness.THIS is America all have the rights to express them selfs,I have read your views and disagree but as always just the opinion of this ol" master and subject to change..bounty....



marieToo -> RE: Just a comment (3/5/2007 7:24:47 AM)

Reply to OP:

People who write up those types of profiles and try to label themselves based on what they would or wouldn't do for another person  have never been bound by anything other than ropes and chains.  I think there is far too much examination coming from the wrong angle, which is why there is never a defining moment where someone knows what the hell they should call themselves. 

I think you're enslaved when your head is so occupied by someone else that you don't even have the inclination to focus on what you wouldn't do for them, but rather the need to beg for the opportunity to do something you hate just for the priviledge to serve that person.  It's in that state of mind that the "sub vs slave vs bottom vs whathaveyou" debate becomes completely inapplicable.



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