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subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 3:29:42 AM

MiladyElaine

Posts: 1086
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline

How many times have you heard this? I will admit that cancer is awfully widespread
but it just seems to be too frequent at times and seems to be a handy "excuse" for some that are no longer with their former Mistress.
Just an observance of Mine.

_____________________________

A crazy quilt is warm but oddly put together.

Milady

Post #: 1

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 4:14:54 AM

BeachMystress

Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline

I've also talked to a lot of subs who say their Domme died in a car wreck. It does happen, but you are right. It does make one wonder.

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to MiladyElaine)

Post #: 2

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 5:29:37 AM

MsCfromMelbourne

Posts: 777
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline

Last year I was in Berlin (wow....the festish capital of Europe. The BDSM clubs were amazing!!!!!)

Met an English sub (working offshore in the EU) who told a heart breaking story that his wife died in a car accident back home in the UK. He lost the plot for a year and then took a job in Germany travelling the world: he could not stand being home for obvious reasons. The 2nd anniversary of her death was coming up next week.

Wasn't that a shocking thing to cope with? Yes and no. His younger brother committed suicide and he found that harder to cope with. Stiff upper lip and all that English stuff

Later he revealed ....haltingly....fighting back tears.....that his two young sons died in the crash too. Poor little things were only 3 and 1.

He did not carry a mobile phone. Odd for an investment adviser. Call him silly but.......his wife had been killed because she was talking on the mobile phone and ran a stop sign. Killed the other driver too.

Yes.....*gulp* ...it was him on the phone. He heard the crash.

Then he let me know that his poor dead wife was pregnant with their third at the time of the fatal accident

He went home to the UK to spend the anniversary of their deaths in quiet contemplation. Another time he had a sudden business meeting in Japan...overnight that weekend

I searched high and low on the internet. Don't you think a triple fatality - especially a Mum with two toddlers - would be reported? I searched the local papers in the area he claimed she was killed. I knew her name and the names of the boys. I found nothing

What could I do? His wife and kids may be alive and kicking south of London. But if they really died - what kind of bitch would call the poor man a liar?

But if it was a scam, he was good!!! To this day I don't know the truth.......but I found him in alt.com so if anyone knows this sub and whether his tragic story is for real, email me!

(in reply to BeachMystress)

Post #: 3

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 6:28:53 AM

undergroundsea

Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline

I cannot bear to read these heartrending scenarios. It brings back all too much my recent grief. Just a few days ago, my domme was abducted by aliens. I miss her terribly. To make matters worse, I was attending a BDSM convention when it occurred. So I didn't even get to say goodbye. I mean, had I been there I could have at least waived at the departing spaceship. And I feel guilty that while the aliens were taking her away, I was partying. So now, I must keep content with staring at the sky and thinking of her. A few days back, there were people looking up at the sky, as was I. They thought that I, like them, was looking at the lunar eclipse. Little did they know. Anyway, I think a heavy flogging will help me get my mind off things.

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to MsCfromMelbourne)

Post #: 4

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 6:34:39 AM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

Yes, mistresses are dropping like flies if you were to believe that BS...
The thing is though, every time you hear "my former died in a car crash, or from cancer", you have to take a deep breath and keep talking to the person until you figure out if he's full of crap or it was a real occurrence, because you can't be an insensitive heartless bitch and say sure she did?!

It sure does happen much more frequently to mistresses than the general population to hear them tell it.. .
*Starting to wonder if masters die off too, or it's just the dominant babes.* M

< Message edited by BlkTallFullfig -- 3/6/2007 6:36:01 AM >

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to MiladyElaine)

Post #: 5

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 8:25:03 AM

DiannaVesta

Posts: 1087
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Mid-Atlantic area
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BeachMystress

I've also talked to a lot of subs who say their Domme died in a car wreck. It does happen, but you are right. It does make one wonder.

lol I was thinking just that when I read the first post. I've heard it all. This pitiful exchange and no real proof that they've done any real training. I work on Nite Flirt talking to guys all day. You should hear some of the stories. One guy spend over 30 minutes telling me how he met his mistress wife but how she stopped being dominant and didn't understand him but that he couldn't leave her because she depends on him sooo much and he feels its his duty to care for her as her slave. lol

Damn I'm thinking "you worthless fuck" if he was telling the truth not only is he spending her money but basically cheating and he's worried about hurting her?

Sometimes guys don't think.

_____________________________

(in reply to BeachMystress)

Post #: 6

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 9:13:23 AM

MiladyElaine

Posts: 1086
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline

It WOULD be interesting to find out if male Doms had these stories to listen to as much as Us. Something tells Me - again, that females as a whole are more honest.

_____________________________

A crazy quilt is warm but oddly put together.

Milady

(in reply to DiannaVesta)

Post #: 7

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 9:18:42 AM

littlesarbonn

Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline

Maybe it's just me, but when a potential partner asks me what happened in previous relationships, I just say it didn't work out, that hopefully I learned from the last relationship so that the next one works out better. In each interaction, I believe one learns more and more about what one needs to do and what one is willing to do.

Fortunately, I've never had a tragedy happen that ended such a relationship, and my personal belief is that these submissives just don't want to admit that perhaps they were in a relationship in the past that didn't work out for whatever reason, or as some others here suspect: They were never in a relationship to begin with.

_____________________________

<---- FYI, this picture looks JUST like me

http://www.littlesarbonn.com/Stickman/Stickman.htm
The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

(in reply to DiannaVesta)

Post #: 8

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 9:24:13 AM

MiladyElaine

Posts: 1086
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline

They all can't be you, sweetie!

_____________________________

A crazy quilt is warm but oddly put together.

Milady

(in reply to littlesarbonn)

Post #: 9

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 11:06:00 AM

MysticFireTopaz

Posts: 50939
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX
Status: offline

Yes, several have told me their former Mistress died from cancer. A few have told me she died in a car wreck. The most common one I hear is that she moved away and the sub couldn't relocate with her for some reason. Since she is presumably still alive and they had such a swimmingly successful relationship (according to the sub), I then ask if I can contact her. It is amazing how many subs pull a disappearing act after that question, or claim to have no means of contacting her.

I can thoroughly understand a relationship not ending on the best of terms and can handle the truth, but often that's not what I get. I can also handle a submissive who has no experience and respect his honesty in admitting it, rather than fabricating a fake former Mistress that never existed.

Lady Topaz

< Message edited by MysticFireTopaz -- 3/6/2007 11:08:10 AM >

(in reply to MiladyElaine)

Post #: 10

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 5:57:13 PM

GoddessDustyGold

Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline

<fast reply> I have also had more than a usual number advise Me that they are "D/s widowers". And/or that they were in a long term relationship and then She had to relocate. To both of these very common explanations of why these experienced boys are between Mistresses, I reply with questions. My number one question is:
"If you were in such a long term and committed relationship, why didn't you move with Her?"
And, as stated, I am always puzzled about the inability to contact this former Mistress. Oh, the hemming and hawing...amazing! And this most often from boys who are not local to Me, so it appears they are more than anxious to relocate now! *Smile*
As to the inordinate number of Mistress deaths...well,it has certainly made Me question, more than once, if I want to continue in the FemDom lifestyle. I am somewhat enamored of living and it seems the odds would not be with Me!

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom

(in reply to MysticFireTopaz)

Post #: 11

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 7:50:25 PM

undergroundsea

Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig
Yes, mistresses are dropping like flies

Maybe that's why the ratio is as tough as it is! ;-)

That's it. I am starting a new movement. At the next munch or BDSM convention, I am going to pass out pamphlets about healthy lifestyles to dommes. Furthermore, I will volunteer to be their exercise partner, especially if they want to take on kickboxing and need a sparring partner or, you know, punching bag. I will volunteer to cook them healthy meals like my special brand of seafood with pasta (more commonly known as tuna helper). I will volunteer to help them release stress through, well, miscellaneous activities.

So here is how I am going to contribute my share to lengthen the lives of dommes.

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

Post #: 12

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 8:09:43 PM

VeryMercurial

Posts: 620
Joined: 6/5/2006
Status: offline

You forgot all the subs whose Mistress moved either to Europe or 3000 miles away!

(in reply to MiladyElaine)

Post #: 13

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/6/2007 10:49:32 PM

BeachMystress

Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline

I was just reminded of an incident that happened about four years ago. I was meeting a sub from the internet for the first time. I told him before we met that I would give him ONE chance and that if he didn't show up, that was it. Of course he didn't show up.

Two days later, this man contacts me via Yahoo Messenger and tells me how sorry he is he didn't show up, that it was just unavoidable and could we try again. My response was, of course.. NO. I asked if he remembered me saying one chance.. He then told me his father died of a heart attack the morning we were to meet. He seemed just too upbeat for someone whose father had just died and while I realize that people do deal with grief differently, I refused a second meeting. I cut off communication.

A year and a half later, the same man contacts me again. I remind him that he stood me up once. He tells me how he is more secure in his submission now. A few mins later I casually asked how his father was and he told me his father was doing great.. they'd gone fishing together over the weekend. Some people lie as easily as they breathe. It is sad to have to be suspicious of a tale of tragedy.

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to VeryMercurial)

Post #: 14

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/7/2007 2:30:24 AM

MadameDahlia

Posts: 2021
Joined: 8/11/2004
From: SoCal aka Hell
Status: offline

Some people will tell you that location is everything. I'm of the opinion that timing is!

I feel that you can safely bet that someone is a big faker if their first email goes a little something like this:

Dear Benevolent, Wise and Generous Mistress,

Thank you for taking time out of your hectic day to read these heartfelt words from a simple, honest man. I write to you with a fractured (and did I mention available?) soul! My poor, beloved Mistress was run over/shot in the head/abducted by bandits/mugged and left to die in the desert and/or perished after a long, brave struggle with (insert disease/condition of choice here).

Though I'm left feeling broken I know... I just know... that the right woman might mend the tattered remains of my throbbing organ (do I need to mention the other throbbing organ I'd like you to attend to??).

After reading your profile (by which I mean wanking to your photos!) I get a strange feeling that maybe we might be meant to be. Though I will always remember and cherish the time I had with Mistress Suzie I hope to move forward, as I know Mistress Samantha would have wanted me to. She really was a beautiful, giving woman. She wouldn't want me to be so alone.

So I humbly submit these words to you... hoping against hope that I might rise from amidst the, no doubt, countless emails you must receive. (Because let's face it toots... your ass is hawt!) Please consider me (even though I match none of your criteria and am lying through my teeth).

Yours faithfully and eternally (but only until you mysteriously get run over/shot in the head/abducted by bandits/mugged and left to die in the desert and/or perished after a long, brave struggle with ~ insert disease/condition of choice here~),

SubOnMyKneesReady2PLZ

Now if you and the submissive have been talking for a while and you both start discussing past relationships it'd be far more appropriate for this sort of information to come to light.

If they harp on the prior relationship for just about any reason it's probably time to cut the strings:

~ If they're not ready to move on and they're constantly singing Mistress So-and-So's praises you're going to likely end up second banana, no matter how invested they prattle on about being. Definitely a relationship that's not going anywhere... move on.
~ If they continually compare you to Mistress So-and-So and it seems that this woman was the submissive's version of perfection they may be a). not ready to move forward or b). living in LaLa-Land, describing their ideal. Either way, you don't fit the bill. Move on.
~ If they're talking heavily about Mistress So-and-So's accomplishments (author, teacher, lawyer AND a budding astronaut, oh my!) they're probably lying compulsively in order to perpetuate the myth that they're capable of relationships. Run. Don't walk. Perhaps suggest, as you flee, that they up the dose on their medication. They're still seeing purple polka-dotted elephants and dancing fruit.

< Message edited by MadameDahlia -- 3/7/2007 2:32:48 AM >

_____________________________

Insanity -- a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
--R. D. Laing

"Oh, but if I went 'round sayin' I was Emperor, just because some moistened bint lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away."

(in reply to BeachMystress)

Post #: 15

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/7/2007 5:07:19 AM

CoyoteWhips

Posts: 45
Joined: 9/11/2006
From: Fitchburg, Mass.
Status: offline

Well, this thread is all very encouraging -- I had fears that domination caused cancer.

Though, just in my personal experience, my former Domina is still alive and sexy.

(in reply to MadameDahlia)

Post #: 16

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/7/2007 5:43:14 AM

BBBTBW

Posts: 836
Joined: 5/21/2004
Status: offline

I was a little concerned about my demise as well. I have heard the cancer story, the car accident story and the moving away story more times than the sun rises and sets. Just yesterday I heard that she moved back to Jamaica after being served for 4 years along with a few others. When I asked him why he didn't go back with her, he said she was married and her husband didn't want him/them to go. I then made the comment about what an odd perdicament he put himself into.

I wish these subs/slaves would get more honest. I too would rather hear that the relationship didn't work out, you don't have any experience etc than some fabricated demise of someone's life. We reap what we sow...remember that.

_____________________________

"You keep using that word, I do not think it means what you think it means" -- Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride

(in reply to CoyoteWhips)

Post #: 17

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/7/2007 5:44:36 AM

MysticFireTopaz

Posts: 50939
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Dallas/Ft. Worth, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BeachMystress

I was just reminded of an incident that happened about four years ago. I was meeting a sub from the internet for the first time. I told him before we met that I would give him ONE chance and that if he didn't show up, that was it. Of course he didn't show up.

Two days later, this man contacts me via Yahoo Messenger and tells me how sorry he is he didn't show up, that it was just unavoidable and could we try again. My response was, of course.. NO. I asked if he remembered me saying one chance.. He then told me his father died of a heart attack the morning we were to meet. He seemed just too upbeat for someone whose father had just died and while I realize that people do deal with grief differently, I refused a second meeting. I cut off communication.

A year and a half later, the same man contacts me again. I remind him that he stood me up once. He tells me how he is more secure in his submission now. A few mins later I casually asked how his father was and he told me his father was doing great.. they'd gone fishing together over the weekend. Some people lie as easily as they breathe. It is sad to have to be suspicious of a tale of tragedy.

They certainly don't have great memories about the lies they tell. A while back, one "no-showed" on me. He claimed he was deathly ill in bed with a pneumonia and was so weak that he could not make it to either his phone or computer to let me know he could not make it. A while later, I was chatting with a Domme friend in IM's, who also happened to be chatting with the sub in question. She asked me if I knew him, and I said yes, I sure did, and told her that he had been a no-show. She confronted him, and he said, "Yeah, I'm really, really sorry that my car accident prevented me from meeting Ms. Topaz that day." I told her to tell him that if he is going to lie, he should at least keep straight which lies he tells to which Dommes.

Lady Topaz

< Message edited by MysticFireTopaz -- 3/7/2007 5:45:18 AM >

(in reply to BeachMystress)

Post #: 18

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/7/2007 7:32:11 AM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: undergroundsea
That's it. I am starting a new movement. At the next munch or BDSM convention, I am going to pass out pamphlets about healthy lifestyles to dommes. Furthermore, I will volunteer to be their exercise partner, especially if they want to take on kickboxing and need a sparring partner or, you know, punching bag. I will volunteer to cook them healthy meals like my special brand of seafood with pasta (more commonly known as tuna helper). I will volunteer to help them release stress through, well, miscellaneous activities.

So here is how I am going to contribute my share to lengthen the lives of dommes.
Sea

Finally a sub with the right idea!
Additionally, we'll have to agree that a healthy meal is the one I tell you I feel like eating, and you cook it because you want to retain your health, lol. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to undergroundsea)

Post #: 19

RE: subs Loosing Former Mistress from cancer - 3/7/2007 7:45:32 AM

BeachMystress

Posts: 2156
Joined: 4/3/2004
From: Naples Island- Long Beach CA - Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig
a healthy meal is the one I tell you I feel like eating, and you cook it because you want to retain your health, lol. M

ROFLMAO.. oh how great! Knew there was a reason I like you!

_____________________________

Beach Mystress
*Do not threaten the weak. Intimidate the strong. ~ Stevenson*
http://beachmystress.jigsy.com
http://www.flickr.com/photos/beachmystress/

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

Post #: 20

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