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Padriag -> RE: Good reason for it (3/8/2007 9:26:23 AM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Arastella
So, for the most part, when you punish a slave/sub, usually a Dom/me will try to fit the punishment with the crime. In your own opinion, what crime(s) would be a good reason to spank your slave/sub and what crimes don't merit a spanking, but possibly a different form of punishment?
In my particular case, because spanking is something I do for play, it would never be appropriate as a punishment simply because it isn't... for myself and those I choose, its fun.
However, in the spirit of your question, here are a few examples of situations and punishments I might apply with a brief explanation of each.
A girl I am currently considering has been very reluctant to answer her cell phone in any public place (why is not relevant here, suffice it to say its mostly just a habit). This has gone against my instruction that when I call, she is to answer unless circumstance absolutely prohibit it. She has, on several occasions disobeyed. Her punishment was a 15 min lecture from me in which she got a good dose of my disapproval. For the week following this was followed by me calling at random times which of course she had to answer or get another brief lecture. Her habit soon changed. There were actually two forms of punishment here, one was my disapproval, the other was the lectures. Both are aversive stimuli (things she wants to avoid), and so she altered her behavior to avoid these two punishments.
Another example, a former girl I was training to adopt specific behaviors, in this case some basic position training (kneeling, crawling in a specific posture, etc.). Initially she kept forgetting or would not assume the correct position. When she failed to do so the punishment was to immediately be required to repeat the position until she had assumed the correct position ten times consecutively, after which she would be praised for having gotten it right. The punishment in this case was the constant repetition, which again was something she wanted to avoid having to do. Again, her behavior soon changed and she was assuming the correct postures when required to do so. In this case the punishment had the additional advantage of also being behavioral skill training. That is it not only helped correct the undesired behavior, but it taught precisely what was desired.
A third example is the most severe. A number of years ago a girl I was dealing with engaged in lying to both me and a number of other people. Her deceptions and some involved behaviors caused a number of people a lot of hurt, myself included. To punish her I required her to write letters to everyone involved, explaining what she had done and offer her humblest appologies, and if necessary face anyone who wanted to confront her and accept whatever they had to say without protest or argument. She was also put on probation with me and had to consciously work towards rebuilding the trust she had destroyed. It was something she had to work at for a long time. The fact that it was prolonged wasn't an intended part of the punishment, but a consequence of the broken trust (which is not rebuilt quickly).
In punishing a slave, I very rarely use corporeal punishments (ie, spankings, kneeling on rice kernels, etc.). That is mainly because most of the slaves I've dealt with have been masochist to one degree or another. Physical punishments were to them akin to throwing Burr Rabbit into the briar patch. That is, not very effective as a punishment. However, with a submissive who is not masochistic, physically aversive stimuli could be effective. The two cautions I would give here are that a) don't mix things done in play with things done for punishment, this can create confusion and undesired by-product behaviors; and b) keep in mind a physical punishment need only be aversive to be effective, it does not have to be extreme to do so.
I'll give two more examples that are NOT punishments.
In several cases I've dealt with girls that had extreme fantasies that I felt inappropriate. In each of these cases I simply ignored it and did nothing to indulge it. Instead I focused on other fantasies and goals. Eventually, in each case, the slave's fantasies faded. This is a process known as extinction in behavioral psychology. I present it only to point out not all behaviors need to be punished to be corrected.
Another, and unfortunate, case was a submissive with a fixation about tattoos. She insisted on getting more despite the fact I had instructed her not too. This led to my ending the relationship. This was not punishment, but it was a consequence of her actions. Whether it altered her behavior I can't say, it may or may not have. The purpose here was not to alter her behavior, but simply end a situation that was not going to be productive for me.
As a last note, what I refer to above as punishment, some prefer to call discipline. A fact that sometimes has caused misunderstandings and confusion. Also note that in none of the above examples of punishment I gave was there any retributive or vengeful aspect. In my considered opinion, anger and vengence have no place in the correct practice of punishment / discipline.
Edited to correct some typos and clarify two points.
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