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KarbonCopy -> Male Slaves (4/1/2005 11:26:47 AM)
Its occured to me, that no matter where I go, I always seem to be heavily out numbered by female slaves. I go onto a chat room or something and its full of nothing but male Masters and female submissives. Problem is, the male Masters, it feels like they dont recognize that women can be Domme just as much as they are Master. There was a Master that I was talking to on a chat about a week ago, and for some reason I infurated him, and he messaged my Mistress and was incredibly rude to her, telling her to punnish me, and called her a whore, and not a real Domme (because women cant be in control I suppose). It was incredibly disrespectful. It seems that a Domme/sub relationship isnt as common as a Dom/sub relationship. Is this true? is it a new wave?

MadameDahlia -> RE: Male Slaves (4/1/2005 11:46:22 AM)
It isn't new or uncommon necessarily. And not all men will react that way. There are some incredible examples of Dominant Gentlemen here on the boards. They're upstanding, intelligent and easy to get along with. The ones who belittle you or think of your Mistress as a psuedo-dominant probably have insecurity issues or may simply by pricks. They use BDSM as a cover so that they can do whatever they want and get away with arrogant, asshole behavior (which sometimes includes abuse).

KarbonCopy -> RE: Male Slaves (4/1/2005 12:15:01 PM)
That makes sense. Just some over dominant assholes saying they're a master so that they can hide their Shovanistic behavior. Why do people pretend they're into this when they're not.

siamsa24 -> RE: Male Slaves (4/1/2005 12:18:52 PM)
quote: Why do people pretend they're into this when they're not. Because it's the internet and they can get away with it

KarbonCopy -> RE: Male Slaves (4/1/2005 12:25:59 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: siamsa24 quote: Why do people pretend they're into this when they're not. Because it's the internet and they can get away with it Touche

Sundew02 -> RE: Male Slaves (4/2/2005 9:47:37 PM)
kc, In my area I know personally 3 other Dommes. I live in a rather large city, but in the midwest. So, yes I would say there are far more Doms than Dommes. One reason might be the fact that unless you are one really strong willed woman you are not going to develop into a Domme. From craddle to grave women are told they need a man to take care of them and think for them, and then there are the men that buy that load of horse apples. I have met males in this lifestyle that view woman as arm ornaments.But I have been around more Doms who understand it isnt whats between your legs, but between your ears that says dominant. To pass along to your Domme as an FYI, she can send that rude email to the moderators here, if the email was sent on this service. Always remember, consider the source........those that speak out their ass spew manure. Enjoy being what and who you are and let the ignorant wallow in their own stupidity. Stay safe, Sundew

HypatiaSwan -> RE: Male Slaves (4/2/2005 10:37:10 PM)
As a leatherdyke, what you're describing is very common in my experience. And it happens mostly from het guys who don't have clue one about any other kind of relationship dynamics save for the "male dom, femme sub" model. They must think they invented bdsm! I really hate it when these assholes assume that all women are submissive and that I am owned by a male. I can't tell you how much this gets on my nerves. Just the whole presumption. So I'm complaining about jerky het guys whose egos sometimes are too big for the room. But I have also found a general cluelessness in the het community in general as far as other relationship models are concerned. Het munches and so-called 'pan groups' are almost always a collection of self-proclaimed male 'masters' and self-proclaimed female 'slaves.' I get the feeling I'm at family night, minus the kids. It's your regular collection of kinky married or dating people who dress up in black a few nights a month and come out to a restaurant to eat. Not that I mind this part because I don't really care much what other folks do or what other folks want to call their dynamic. But I do mind the complete and utter cluelessness that most of them demonstrate about other relationship models. I wish more of them would come out to the leather community functions. It would certainly be an education for a lot of them. So I hang mostly in the leather community. This community is about 90% gay/lesbian/queer and I am much happier here. There are jerks of every flavor everywhere, of course. But in my experience, LGBT people are much more in the know about different relationship models. When you are dealing with mostly same sex couples, obviously, it isn't going to be comprised of all male dominants and all female submissives. There is much greater respect for different relatioinship models, gender-bending and non-traditional roles in the leather community. Not that it's a pc, bdsm utopia, just that I have found fewer people making assumptions about gender roles. I really feel for het male submissives. I simply can't believe that most het males are tops. I just think that a lot of guys automatically say they are tops because they perceive it improper to be male and submissive. Pro domme establishments are chock full of guys who say they are slaves or submissives. I think that a lot of male submissives stay in the closet because of social pressures. All right. My 200 ppm. YMMV.

BlkTallFullfig -> RE: Male Slaves (4/2/2005 10:39:44 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: KarbonCopy There was a Master that I was talking to on a chat about a week ago, and for some reason I infurated him, and he messaged my Mistress and was incredibly rude to her, telling her to punnish me, and called her a whore, and not a real Domme (because women cant be in control I suppose). It was incredibly disrespectful. I would say he was more of a jerkoff than a Master... I see a Master as one who is confident enough not to hate/disrespect women (weather she is Dominant or Submissive), and one who doesn't lose control over nothing as you describe above. So, take most online bad behavior as that of people who are unable to deal with real life or unable to do what they profess in real life, spewing BS simply because they can anonymously. M

KarbonCopy -> RE: Male Slaves (4/3/2005 1:06:53 AM)
Hey thanks for everyone's replies, I really appreciate another more tollerant view on this subject. Its nice to know that there are more educated people that will accept us male subs and respect the choices and the lifestyles that we lead. Sure I'm a male sub, but that doesnt mean that I dont take charge in other areas, so sure that covers the redneck view on Male dominance. Mabey they just dont understand, because they havnt been taken dow, not a peg or two, but all the way to the bottom to experience 100% domination and servitude. When you have a woman that can completely work you under her thumb despite, your size, determination, or prejiduce for women in control, that can be an eye opener.

BeachMystress -> RE: Male Slaves (4/3/2005 4:32:38 AM)
Male subs are pretty common, they just have trouble finding a partner. Domme are rare. Due to that, the relationship is less common than a Dom/femsub one. It doesn't mean it is uncommon however, and I've yet to meet a Dom who was secure in himself who couldn't accept a Domme as an equal. You need to keep in mind that just because this male tacked the word Master to his description or ID, doesn't mean he is one. He is probably one of thousands of internet players who come home from their low level jobs and hide from wife and family in the computer room; recreating their life as a powerful, sexually competent being. Ya know.. the legend in their own mind type. Laugh about him and forget the incident. (I know that is a bit hard for you, since he insulted your Woman. Keep in mind he knows neither of you and his opinion is worthless in your life.) Anyone who feels the need to yell or be disrespectful rather than discuss an issue isn't worth your notice. Mentally label them as low class trash and move on.

KarbonCopy -> RE: Male Slaves (4/3/2005 8:09:15 AM)
Hey thanks alot BeachMystress. You're right its hard to just shrug it off, since not only is she my Mistress, she is also my fiancee, and we've been together for awhile now. BDSM, D/s, Whatever, you dont take kindly to some asshole calling your fiancee/girlfriend/wife etc a whore. I wonder how many bar fights were started as a result to just that. Some insecure asshole disrespecting another mans love.

HypatiaSwan -> RE: Male Slaves (4/3/2005 9:00:47 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: KarbonCopy >>Sure I'm a male sub, but that doesnt mean that I dont take charge in other areas, so sure that covers the redneck view on Male dominance. Mabey they just dont understand, because they havnt been taken dow, not a peg or two, but all the way to the bottom to experience 100% domination and servitude.<< Of course you take charge in other areas. Just like the countless independent female submissives and slaves who are, in their own rights, very competent and capable people. One has to have a very strong sense of who one is in order to truly submit. And we have to have our shit together. No owner wants to take on a problem child or a needy, feeble-minded slug. What good would we be to our owners if we needed to be cared for like small children? Submission is not about getting less responsibility. It is about having more responsibility. It is about being strong enough to allow one's vulnerabilities to be exposed. That takes courage. It takes hard work and it takes a tremendous amount of fortitude. And here I'm talking about really giving up power and control - not just doing a little spanky spanky in the bedroom. The bravado macho types who fancy themselves 'masters' are, in my experience, terribly little people.

KarbonCopy -> RE: Male Slaves (4/3/2005 9:19:49 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: HypatiaSwan quote: ORIGINAL: KarbonCopy >>Sure I'm a male sub, but that doesnt mean that I dont take charge in other areas, so sure that covers the redneck view on Male dominance. Mabey they just dont understand, because they havnt been taken dow, not a peg or two, but all the way to the bottom to experience 100% domination and servitude.<< Of course you take charge in other areas. Just like the countless independent female submissives and slaves who are, in their own rights, very competent and capable people. One has to have a very strong sense of who one is in order to truly submit. And we have to have our shit together. No owner wants to take on a problem child or a needy, feeble-minded slug. What good would we be to our owners if we needed to be cared for like small children? Submission is not about getting less responsibility. It is about having more responsibility. It is about being strong enough to allow one's vulnerabilities to be exposed. That takes courage. It takes hard work and it takes a tremendous amount of fortitude. And here I'm talking about really giving up power and control - not just doing a little spanky spanky in the bedroom. The bravado macho types who fancy themselves 'masters' are, in my experience, terribly little people. amen

MsSilvie -> RE: Male Slaves (4/3/2005 10:45:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: KarbonCopy Why do people pretend they're into this when they're not. Because what they are isn't nearly so appealing as what they pretend to be?

asissyforher -> RE: Male Slaves (6/14/2005 4:18:27 PM)
quote: Its occured to me, that no matter where I go, I always seem to be heavily out numbered by female slaves. and we always will be.......it's the nature of the beast. i just deal with it. a sissy

subrob1967 -> RE: Male Slaves (6/15/2005 7:23:55 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: KarbonCopy Its occured to me, that no matter where I go, I always seem to be heavily out numbered by female slaves. I go onto a chat room or something and its full of nothing but male Masters and female submissives. Problem is, the male Masters, it feels like they dont recognize that women can be Domme just as much as they are Master. There was a Master that I was talking to on a chat about a week ago, and for some reason I infurated him, and he messaged my Mistress and was incredibly rude to her, telling her to punnish me, and called her a whore, and not a real Domme (because women cant be in control I suppose). It was incredibly disrespectful. It seems that a Domme/sub relationship isnt as common as a Dom/sub relationship. Is this true? is it a new wave? I'd say your first mistake was going into a chat room, IMO 95% of chatters are fakes and wannabe's. My Dommes's and I have had trouble in the past with groups where the Doms didn't accept Fem Dommes, or male subs, so we found a new group. Domnme's are hard to find, and lifestyle non pro Dommes, even harder, and finding a local group that accepts ALL lifestyle choices the hardest one of all. I think it's sad the we alternative lfestylers are supposed to be the most tolerant of all, and we're not.

terah -> RE: Male Slaves (6/15/2005 8:47:51 AM)
Just chalk the experience up to a dom who has top disease. They all want to rule the roost. It wasn't you as much are you being a submissive male which he found infurating. That may have made him uncomfortable with his own dominance. If a male can be sub then a male can be controlled a contradiction as to what he tells his minion that he is god , all men are..lol Vice versa why would he want his minion to assume she has any power in a relationship. Your Domina is a direct contradiction again that women are weak. I wouldn't give this so called dominant male any consideration if he isn't willing to give you and yours the same. It's about respect. EVERYONE deserves it. Manners are lost online it's up to E/everyone to hold themselves as a good example and those who don't IGNORE.[:)]

suberic101 -> RE: Male Slaves (6/15/2005 8:16:22 PM)
Geez, there are some annoying freaks out there, lol. I wonder how he would do in the military with female officers...lol

Hissweetshiv -> RE: Male Slaves (6/28/2005 6:06:14 AM)
I have to agree that adopting the word master in your profile does not a Dominant make. If we were all sitting in a hall somewhere, these would be the men that i would turn my back on and refuse to call "Sir". Since this is online, i can refuse to give them that title, and i can refuse to cap the word master in reference to them because they aren't. These individuals are quick to earn an ignore from me. I can't answer the question of whether male subs are rare or not, having spent most of my online time in a BBW submissives chat room. They are certainly rare in a room intended for female submissives... but that doesn't mean they aren't out there. We had our share of Dommes wander through too. It really is a shame that some out there can't accept a different lifestyle model from what works for them, especially since the lifestyle is supposed to be (partially) about acceptance of different views. Bottom line, i'd just ignore the wannabe and get on with loving your Lady to the best of your ability.[;)]

lonewolf05 -> RE: Male Slaves (6/28/2005 7:46:16 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: subrob1967 quote: ORIGINAL: KarbonCopy Its occured to me, that no matter where I go, I always seem to be heavily out numbered by female slaves. I go onto a chat room or something and its full of nothing but male Masters and female submissives. Problem is, the male Masters, it feels like they dont recognize that women can be Domme just as much as they are Master. There was a Master that I was talking to on a chat about a week ago, and for some reason I infurated him, and he messaged my Mistress and was incredibly rude to her, telling her to punnish me, and called her a whore, and not a real Domme (because women cant be in control I suppose). It was incredibly disrespectful. It seems that a Domme/sub relationship isnt as common as a Dom/sub relationship. Is this true? is it a new wave? I'd say your first mistake was going into a chat room, IMO 95% of chatters are fakes and wannabe's. My Dommes's and I have had trouble in the past with groups where the Doms didn't accept Fem Dommes, or male subs, so we found a new group. Domnme's are hard to find, and lifestyle non pro Dommes, even harder, and finding a local group that accepts ALL lifestyle choices the hardest one of all. I think it's sad the we alternative lfestylers are supposed to be the most tolerant of all, and we're not. quote: ----------------- here here!!

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